“let the boys have it if they like it,” said mrs. garrow, pleading to her only daughter on behalf of her two sons.
“pray don’t, mamma,” said elizabeth garrow. “it only means romping. to me all that is detestable, and i am sure it is not the sort of thing that miss holmes would like.”
“we always had it at christmas when we were young.”
“but, mamma, the world is so changed.”
the point in dispute was one very delicate in its nature, hardly to be discussed in all its bearings, even in fiction, and the very mention of which between mother and daughter showed a great amount of close confidence between them. it was no less than this. should that branch of mistletoe which frank garrow had brought home with him out of the lowther woods be hung up on christmas eve in the dining-room at thwaite hall, according to his wishes; or should permission for such hanging be positively refused? it was clearly a thing not to be done after such a discussion, and therefore the decision given by mrs. garrow was against it.
i am inclined to think that miss garrow was right in saying that the world is changed as touching mistletoe boughs. kissing, i fear, is less innocent now than it used to be when our grand-mothers were alive, and we have become more fastidious in our amusements. nevertheless, i think that she made herself fairly open to the raillery with which her brothers attacked her.
“honi soit qui mal y pense,” said frank, who was eighteen.
“nobody will want to kiss you, my lady fineairs,” said harry, who was just a year younger.
“because you choose to be a puritan, there are to be no more cakes and ale in the house,” said frank.
“still waters run deep; we all know that,” said harry.
the boys had not been present when the matter was decided between mrs. garrow and her daughter, nor had the mother been present when these little amenities had passed between the brothers and sister.
“only that mamma has said it, and i wouldn’t seem to go against her,” said frank, “i’d ask my father. he wouldn’t give way to such nonsense, i know.”
elizabeth turned away without answering, and left the room. her eyes were full of tears, but she would not let them see that they had vexed her. they were only two days home from school, and for the last week before their coming, all her thoughts had been to prepare for their christmas pleasures. she had arranged their rooms, making everything warm and pretty. out of her own pocket she had bought a shot-belt for one, and skates for the other. she had told the old groom that her pony was to belong exclusively to master harry for the holidays, and now harry told her that still waters ran deep. she had been driven to the use of all her eloquence in inducing her father to purchase that gun for frank, and now frank called her a puritan. and why? she did not choose that a mistletoe bough should be hung in her father’s hall, when godfrey holmes was coming to visit him. she could not explain this to frank, but frank might have had the wit to understand it. but frank was thinking only of patty coverdale, a blue-eyed little romp of sixteen, who, with her sister kate, was coming from penrith to spend the christmas at thwaite hall. elizabeth left the room with her slow, graceful step, hiding her tears,—hiding all emotion, as latterly she had taught herself that it was feminine to do. “there goes my lady fineairs,” said harry, sending his shrill voice after her.
thwaite hall was not a place of much pretension. it was a moderate-sized house, surrounded by pretty gardens and shrubberies, close down upon the river eamont, on the westmoreland side of the river, looking over to a lovely wooded bank in cumberland. all the world knows that the eamont runs out of ulleswater, dividing the two counties, passing under penrith bridge and by the old ruins of brougham castle, below which it joins the eden. thwaite hall nestled down close upon the clear rocky stream about half way between ulleswater and penrith, and had been built just at a bend of the river. the windows of the dining-parlour and of the drawing-room stood at right angles to each other, and yet each commanded a reach of the stream. immediately from a side of the house steps were cut down through the red rock to the water’s edge, and here a small boat was always moored to a chain. the chain was stretched across the river, fixed to the staples driven into the rock on either side, and the boat was pulled backwards and forwards over the stream without aid from oars or paddles. from the opposite side a path led through the woods and across the fields to penrith, and this was the route commonly used between thwaite hall and the town.
major garrow was a retired officer of engineers, who had seen service in all parts of the world, and who was now spending the evening of his days on a small property which had come to him from his father. he held in his own hands about twenty acres of land, and he was the owner of one small farm close by, which was let to a tenant. that, together with his half-pay, and the interest of his wife’s thousand pounds, sufficed to educate his children and keep the wolf at a comfortable distance from his door. he himself was a spare thin man, with quiet, lazy, literary habits. he had done the work of life, but had so done it as to permit of his enjoying that which was left to him. his sole remaining care was the establishment of his children; and, as far as he could see, he had no ground for anticipating disappointment. they were clever, good-looking, well-disposed young people, and upon the whole it may be said that the sun shone brightly on thwaite hall. of mrs. garrow it may suffice to say that she always deserved such sunshine.
for years past it had been the practice of the family to have some sort of gathering at thwaite hall during christmas. godfrey holmes had been left under the guardianship of major garrow, and, as he had always spent his christmas holidays with his guardian, this, perhaps, had given rise to the practice. then the coverdales were cousins of the garrows, and they had usually been there as children. at the christmas last past the custom had been broken, for young holmes had been abroad. previous to that, they had all been children, excepting him. but now that they were to meet again, they were no longer children. elizabeth, at any rate, was not so, for she had already counted nineteen winters. and isabella holmes was coming. now isabella was two years older than elizabeth, and had been educated in brussels; moreover she was comparatively a stranger at thwaite hall, never having been at those early christmas meetings.
and now i must take permission to begin my story by telling a lady’s secret. elizabeth garrow had already been in love with godfrey holmes, or perhaps it might be more becoming to say that godfrey holmes had already been in love with her. they had already been engaged; and, alas! they had already agreed that that engagement should be broken off!
young holmes was now twenty-seven years of age, and was employed in a bank at liverpool, not as a clerk, but as assistant-manager, with a large salary. he was a man well to do in the world, who had money also of his own, and who might well afford to marry. some two years since, on the eve of leaving thwaite hall, he had with low doubting whisper told elizabeth that he loved her, and she had flown trembling to her mother. “godfrey, my boy,” the father said to him, as he parted with him the next morning, “bessy is only a child, and too young to think of this yet.” at the next christmas godfrey was in italy, and the thing was gone by,—so at least the father and mother said to each other. but the young people had met in the summer, and one joyful letter had come from the girl home to her mother. “i have accepted him. dearest, dearest mamma, i do love him. but don’t tell papa yet, for i have not quite accepted him. i think i am sure, but i am not quite sure. i am not quite sure about him.”
and then, two days after that, there had come a letter that was not at all joyful. “dearest mamma,—it is not to be. it is not written in the book. we have both agreed that it will not do. i am so glad that you have not told dear papa, for i could never make him understand. you will understand, for i shall tell you everything, down to his very words. but we have agreed that there shall be no quarrel. it shall be exactly as it was, and he will come at christmas all the same. it would never do that he and papa should be separated, nor could we now put off isabella. it is better so in every way, for there is and need be no quarrel. we still like each other. i am sure i like him, but i know that i should not make him happy as his wife. he says it is my fault. i, at any rate, have never told him that i thought it his.” from all which it will be seen that the confidence between the mother and daughter was very close.
elizabeth garrow was a very good girl, but it might almost be a question whether she was not too good. she had learned, or thought that she had learned, that most girls are vapid, silly, and useless,—given chiefly to pleasure-seeking and a hankering after lovers; and she had resolved that she would not be such a one.
industry, self-denial, and a religious purpose in life, were the tasks which she set herself; and she went about the performance of them with much courage. but such tasks, though they are excellently well adapted to fit a young lady for the work of living, may also be carried too far, and thus have the effect of unfitting her for that work. when elizabeth garrow made up her mind that the finding of a husband was not the only purpose of life, she did very well. it is very well that a young lady should feel herself capable of going through the world happily without one. but in teaching herself this she also taught herself to think that there was a certain merit in refusing herself the natural delight of a lover, even though the possession of the lover were compatible with all her duties to herself, her father and mother, and the world at large. it was not that she had determined to have no lover. she made no such resolve, and when the proper lover came he was admitted to her heart. but she declared to herself unconsciously that she must put a guard upon herself, lest she should be betrayed into weakness by her own happiness. she had resolved that in loving her lord she would not worship him, and that in giving her heart she would only so give it as it should be given to a human creature like herself. she had acted on these high resolves, and hence it had come to pass,—not unnaturally,—that mr. godfrey holmes had told her that it was “her fault.”
she was a pretty, fair girl, with soft dark-brown hair, and soft long dark eyelashes. her grey eyes, though quiet in their tone, were tender and lustrous. her face was oval, and the lines of her cheek and chin perfect in their symmetry. she was generally quiet in her demeanour, but when moved she could rouse herself to great energy, and speak with feeling and almost with fire. her fault was a reverence for martyrdom in general, and a feeling, of which she was unconscious, that it became a young woman to be unhappy in secret;—that it became a young woman, i might rather say, to have a source of unhappiness hidden from the world in general, and endured without any detriment to her outward cheerfulness. we know the story of the spartan boy who held the fox under his tunic. the fox was biting into him,—into the very entrails; but the young hero spake never a word. now bessy garrow was inclined to think that it was a good thing to have a fox always biting, so that the torment caused no ruffling to her outward smiles. now at this moment the fox within her bosom was biting her sore enough, but she bore it without flinching.
“if you would rather that he should not come i will have it arranged,” her mother had said to her.
“not for worlds,” she had answered. “i should never think well of myself again.”
her mother had changed her own mind more than once as to the conduct in this matter which might be best for her to follow, thinking solely of her daughter’s welfare. “if he comes they will be reconciled, and she will be happy,” had been her first idea. but then there was a stern fixedness of purpose in bessy’s words when she spoke of mr. holmes, which had expelled this hope, and mrs. garrow had for a while thought it better that the young man should not come. but bessy would not permit this. it would vex her father, put out of course the arrangements of other people, and display weakness on her own part. he should come, and she would endure without flinching while the fox gnawed at her.
that battle of the mistletoe had been fought on the morning before christmas-day, and the holmeses came on christmas-eve. isabella was comparatively a stranger, and therefore received at first the greater share of attention. she and elizabeth had once seen each other, and for the last year or two had corresponded, but personally they had never been intimate. unfortunately for the latter, that story of godfrey’s offer and acceptance had been communicated to isabella, as had of course the immediately subsequent story of their separation. but now it would be almost impossible to avoid the subject in conversation. “dearest isabella, let it be as though it had never been,” she had said in one of her letters. but sometimes it is very difficult to let things be as though they had never been.
the first evening passed over very well. the two coverdale girls were there, and there had been much talking and merry laughter, rather juvenile in its nature, but on the whole none the worse for that. isabella holmes was a fine, tall, handsome girl; good-humoured, and well disposed to be pleased; rather frenchified in her manners, and quite able to take care of herself. but she was not above round games, and did not turn up her nose at the boys. godfrey behaved himself excellently, talking much to the major, but by no means avoiding miss garrow. mrs. garrow, though she had known him since he was a boy, had taken an aversion to him since he had quarrelled with her daughter; but there was no room on this first night for showing such aversion, and everything went off well.
“godfrey is very much improved,” the major said to his wife that night.
“do you think so?”
“indeed i do. he has filled out and become a fine man.”
“in personal appearance, you mean. yes, he is well-looking enough.”
“and in his manner, too. he is doing uncommonly well in liverpool, i can tell you; and if he should think of bessy—”
“there is nothing of that sort,” said mrs. garrow.
“he did speak to me, you know,—two years ago. bessy was too young then, and so indeed was he. but if she likes him—”
“i don’t think she does.”
“then there’s an end of it.” and so they went to bed.
“frank,” said the sister to her elder brother, knocking at his door when they had all gone up stairs, “may i come in,—if you are not in bed?”
“in bed,” said he, looking up with some little pride from his greek book; “i’ve one hundred and fifty lines to do before i can get to bed. it’ll be two, i suppose. i’ve got to mug uncommon hard these holidays. i have only one more half, you know, and then—”
“don’t overdo it, frank.”
“no; i won’t overdo it. i mean to take one day a week, and work eight hours a day on the other five. that will be forty hours a week, and will give me just two hundred hours for the holidays. i have got it all down here on a table. that will be a hundred and five for greek play, forty for algebra—” and so he explained to her the exact destiny of all his long hours of proposed labour. he had as yet been home a day and a half, and had succeeded in drawing out with red lines and blue figures the table which he showed her. “if i can do that, it will be pretty well; won’t it?”
“but, frank, you have come home for your holidays,—to enjoy yourself?”
“but a fellow must work now-a-days.”
“don’t overdo it, dear; that’s all. but, frank, i could not rest if i went to bed without speaking to you. you made me unhappy to-day.”
“did i, bessy?”
“you called me a puritan, and then you quoted that ill-natured french proverb at me. do you really believe your sister thinks evil, frank?” and as she spoke she put her arm caressingly round his neck.
“of course i don’t.”
“then why say so? harry is so much younger and so thoughtless that i can bear what he says without so much suffering. but if you and i are not friends i shall be very wretched. if you knew how i have looked forward to your coming home!”
“i did not mean to vex you, and i won’t say such things again.”
“that’s my own frank. what i said to mamma, i said because i thought it right; but you must not say that i am a puritan. i would do anything in my power to make your holidays bright and pleasant. i know that boys require so much more to amuse them than girls do. good night, dearest; pray don’t overdo yourself with work, and do take care of your eyes.”
so saying she kissed him and went her way. in twenty minutes after that, he had gone to sleep over his book; and when he woke up to find the candle guttering down, he resolved that he would not begin his measured hours till christmas-day was fairly over.
the morning of christmas-day passed very quietly. they all went to church, and then sat round the fire chatting until the four o’clock dinner was ready. the coverdale girls thought it was rather more dull than former thwaite hall festivities, and frank was seen to yawn. but then everybody knows that the real fun of christmas never begins till the day itself be passed. the beef and pudding are ponderous, and unless there be absolute children in the party, there is a difficulty in grafting any special afternoon amusements on the sunday pursuits of the morning. in the evening they were to have a dance; that had been distinctly promised to patty coverdale; but the dance would not commence till eight. the beef and pudding were ponderous, but with due efforts they were overcome and disappeared. the glass of port was sipped, the almonds and raisins were nibbled, and then the ladies left the room. ten minutes after that elizabeth found herself seated with isabella holmes over the fire in her father’s little book-room. it was not by her that this meeting was arranged, for she dreaded such a constrained confidence; but of course it could not be avoided, and perhaps it might be as well now as hereafter.
