on june 7th dr. macnare wrote, "something is developing which i hesitate to put down on paper—for a variety of reasons. creating adam was a scientific experiment, nothing more than that. both the premises on which the project was based have been proven: that the principle of verification is the main factor in learned response, and that, given the proper conditions, some animals are capable of abstract symbol systems and therefore of thinking with words to form meaningful concepts.
"nothing more was contemplated in the experiment. i stress this because—adam is becoming deeply religious—and before any mistaken conclusions are drawn from this i will explain what caused this development. it was an oversight of a type that is bound to happen in any complex project.
"alice's experimental data on the effects of opiates, and especially the data on increasing the dose to offset growing tolerance, were based on observation of the subject alone, without any knowledge of the mental aspects of increased tolerance—which would of course be impossible except with human subjects.
"unknown to us, adam has been becoming partly conscious during his bath. just conscious enough to be vaguely aware of certain sensations, and to remember them afterward. few, if any, of these half remembered sensations are such that he can fit them into the pattern of his waking reality.
"the one that has had the most pronounced influence on him is, to quote him, 'feel clean inside. feel good.' quite obviously this sensation is caused by his bath.
"with it is a distinct feeling of disembodiment, of being—and these are his own words—'outside my body'! this, of course, is an accurate realization, because to him the robot is his body, and he knows nothing of the existence of his actual, living, rat body.
"in addition to these two effects, there is a third one. a feeling of walking, and sometimes of floating, of stumbling over things he can't see, of talking, of being talked to by disembodied voices.
"the explanation of this is also obvious. when he is being bathed his legs are moved about. any movement of a leg is to him either a spoken sound or a movement of some part of his robot body. any movement of his right front leg, for example, tells his mind that he is making a sound. but, since his leg is not connected to the sound system of his robot body, his ears bring no physical verification of the sound. the mental anticipation of that verification then becomes a disembodied voice to him.
"the end result of all this is that adam is becoming convinced that there is a hidden side of things (which there is), and that it is supernatural (which it is, in the framework of his orientation).
"what we are going to have to do is make sure he is completely unconscious before taking him out and bathing him. his mental health is far more important than exploring the interesting avenues opened up by this unforeseen development.
"i do intend, however, to make one simple test, while he is fully awake, before dropping this avenue of investigation."
dr. macnare does not state in his notes what this test was to be: but his wife says that it probably refers to the time when he pinched adam's tail and adam complained of a sudden, violent headache. this transference is the one well known to doctors. unoriented pain in the human body manifests itself as a "headache," when the source of the pain is actually the stomach, or the liver, or any one of a hundred spots in the body.
the last notes made by dr. macnare were those of june 11, 1957, and are unimportant except for the date. we return, therefore, to actual events, so far as they can be reconstructed.
we have said little or nothing about dr. macnare's life at the university after embarking on the research project, nor of the social life of the macnares. as conspirators, they had kept up their social life to avoid any possibility of the board getting curious about any radical change in dr. macnare's habits; but as time went on both dr. macnare and his wife became so engrossed in their project that only with the greatest reluctance did they go anywhere.
the annual faculty party at professor long's on june 12th was something they could not evade. not to have gone would have been almost tantamount to a resignation from the university.
"besides," alice had said when they discussed the matter in may, "isn't it about time to do a little hinting that you have something up your sleeve?"
"i don't know, alice," dr. macnare had said. then a smile quirked his lips and he said, "i wouldn't mind telling off veerhof. i've never gotten over his deciding something was impossible without enough data to pass judgment." he frowned. "we are going to have to let the world know about adam pretty soon, aren't we? that's something i haven't thought about. but not yet. next fall will be time enough."
"don't forget, joe," alice said at dinner. "tonight's the party at professor long's."
"how can i forget with you reminding me?" dr. macnare said, winking at his son.
"and you, paul," alice said. "i don't want you leaving the house. you understand? you can watch tv, and i want you in bed by nine thirty."
"ah, mom!" paul protested. "nine thirty?" he suppressed a grin. he had a party of his own planned.
"and you can wipe the dishes for me. we have to be at professor long's by eight o'clock."
"i'll help you," dr. macnare said.
"no, you have to get ready. besides don't you have to look up something for one of the faculty?"
"i'd forgotten," said dr. macnare. "thanks for reminding me."
after dinner he went directly to the study. adam was sitting on the floor playing with his wooden blocks. they were alphabet blocks, but he didn't know that yet. the summer project was going to be teaching him the alphabet. already, though, he preferred placing them in straight rows rather than stacking them up.
at seven o'clock alice rapped on the door to the study.
"time to get dressed, joe," she called.
"you'll be all right while we're gone, adam?" dr. macnare said.
"i be all right, papa," adam said. "i sleep."
"that's good," dr. macnare said. "i'll turn out the light."
at the door he waited until adam had sat down in the chair he always slept on, and settled himself. then he pushed the switch just to the right of the door and went out.
"hurry, dear," alice called.
"i'm hurrying," dr. macnare protested—and, for the first time, he forgot to lock the study door.
the bathroom was next to the study, the wall between them soundproofed by a ceiling-high bookshelf in the study filled with thousands of books. on the other side was the master bedroom, with a closet with sliding panels that opened both on the bedroom and the bathroom. these sliding panels were partly open, so that dr. macnare and alice could talk.
"did you lock the study door?"
"of course," dr. macnare said. "but i'll check before we leave."
"how is adam taking being alone tonight?" alice called.
"okay," dr. macnare said. "damn!"
"what's the matter, joe?"
"i forgot to get razor blades."
the conversation died down.
alice macnare finished dressing.
"aren't you ready yet, joe?" she called. "it's almost a quarter to eight."
"be right with you. i nicked myself shaving with an old blade. the bleeding's almost stopped now."
alice went into the living room. paul had turned on the tv and was sprawled out on the rug.
"you be sure and stay home, and be in bed by nine thirty, paul," she said. "promise?"
"ah, mom," he protested. "well, all right."
dr. macnare came into the room, still working on his tie. a moment later they went out the front door. they had been gone less than five minutes when there was a knock. paul jumped to his feet and opened the door.
"hi, fred, tony, bill," he said.
the boys, all nine years old, sprawled on the rug and watched television. it became eight o'clock, eight thirty, and finally five minutes to nine. the commercial began.
"where's your bathroom?" tony asked.
"in there," paul said, pointing vaguely at the doorway to the hall.
tony got up off the floor and went into the hall. he saw several doors, all looking much alike. he picked one and opened it. it was dark inside. he felt along the wall for a light switch and found it. light flooded the room. he stared at what he saw for perhaps ten seconds, then turned and ran down the hall to the living room.
"say, paul!" he said. "you never said anything about having a real honest to gosh robot!"
"what are you talking about?" paul said.
"in that room in there!" tony said. "come on. i'll show you!"
the tv program forgotten, paul, fred, and bill crowded after him. a moment later they stood in the doorway to the study, staring in awe at the strange figure of metal that sat motionless in a chair across the room.
adam, it seems certain, was asleep, and had not been wakened by this intrusion nor the turning on of the light.
"gee!" paul said. "it belongs to dad. we'd better get out of here."
"naw," tony said with a feeling of proprietorship at having been the original discoverer. "let's take a look. he'll never know about it."
they crossed the room slowly, until they were close up to the robot figure, marveling at it, moving around it.
"say!" bill whispered, pointing. "what's that in there? it looks like a white rat with its head stuck into that kind of helmet thing."
they stared at it a moment.
"maybe it's dead. let's see."
"how you going to find out?"
"see those hinges on the cover?" tony said importantly. "watch." with cautious skill he opened the transparent back half of the dome, and reached in, wrapping his fingers around the white rat.
he was unable to get it loose, but he succeeded in pulling its head free of the helmet.
at the same time adam awoke.
"ouch!" tony cried, jerking his hand away. "he bit me!"
"he's alive all right," bill said. "look at him glare!" he prodded the body of the rat and pulled his hand away quickly as the rat lunged.
"gee, look at its eyes," paul said nervously. "they're getting blood-shot."
"dirty old rat!" tony said vindictively, jabbing at the rat with his finger and evading the snapping teeth.
"get its head back in there!" paul said desperately. "i don't want papa to find out we were in here!" he reached in, driven by desperation, pressing the rat's head between his fingers and forcing it back into the tight fitting helmet.
immediately screaming sounds erupted from the lips of the robot. (it was determined by later examination that only when the rat's body was completely where it should be were the circuits operable.)
"let's get out of here!" tony shouted, and dived for the door, thereby saving his life.
"yeah! let's get out of here!" fred shouted as the robot figure rose to its feet. terror enabled him to escape.
bill and paul delayed an instant too long. metal fingers seized them. bill's arm snapped halfway between shoulder and elbow. he screamed with pain and struggled to free himself.
paul was unable to scream. metal fingers gripped his shoulder, with a metal thumb thrust deeply against his larynx, paralyzing his vocal cords.
fred and tony had run into the front room. there they waited, ready to start running again. they could hear bill's screams. they could hear a male voice jabbering nonsense, and finally repeating over and over again, "oh my, oh my, oh my," in a tone all the more horrible because it portrayed no emotion whatever.
then there was silence.
the silence lasted several minutes. then bill began to sniffle, rubbing his knuckles in his eyes. "i wanta go home," he whimpered.
"me too."
they took each other's hand and tiptoed to the front door, watching the open doorway to the hall. when they reached the front door tony opened it, and when it was open they ran, not stopping to close the door behind them.
there isn't much more to tell. it is known that tony and bill arrived at their respective homes, saying nothing of what had happened. only later did they come forward and admit their share in the night's events.
joe and alice macnare arrived home from the party at professor long's at twelve thirty, finding the front door wide open, the lights on in the living room, and the television on.
sensing that something was wrong, alice hurried to her son's room and discovered he wasn't there. while she was doing that, joe shut the front door and turned off the television.
alice returned to the living room, eyes round with alarm, and said, "paul's not in his room!"
"adam!" joe croaked, and rushed into the hallway, with alice following more slowly.
she reached the open door of the study in time to see the robot figure pounce on joe and fasten its metal fingers about his throat, crushing vertebrae and flesh alike.
oblivious to her own danger, she rushed to rescue her already dead husband, but the metal fingers were inflexible. belatedly she abandoned the attempt and ran into the hallway to the phone.
when the police arrived, they found her slumped against the wall in the hallway. she pointed toward the open doorway of the study, without speaking.
the police rushed into the study. at once there came the sounds of shots. dozens of them, it seemed. later both policemen admitted that they lost their heads and fired until their guns were empty.
but it was not yet the end of adam.
it would perhaps be impossible to conceive the full horror of his last hours, but we can at least make a guess. asleep when the boys entered the study, he awakened to a world he had never before perceived except very vaguely and under the soporific veil of opiate.
but it was a world vastly different even than that. there is no way of knowing what he saw—probably blurred ghostly figures, monstrous beyond the ability of his mind to grasp, for his eyes were adjusted only to the series of prisms and lenses that enabled him to see and co?rdinate the images brought to him through the eyes of the robot.
he saw these impossible figures, he felt pain and torture that were not of the flesh as he knew it, but of the spirit; agony beyond agony administered by what he could only believe were fiends from some nether hell.
and then, abruptly, as ten-year-old paul shoved his head back into the helmet, the world he had come to believe was reality returned. it was as though he had returned to the body from some awful pit of hell, with the soul sickness still with him.
before him he saw four human-like figures of reality, but beings unlike the only two he had ever seen. smaller, seeming to be a part of the unbelievable nightmare he had been in. two of them fled, two were within his grasp.
perhaps he didn't know what he was doing when he killed paul and bill. it's doubtful if he had the ability to think at all then, only to tremble and struggle in his pitiful little rat body, with the automatic mechanisms of the robot acting from those frantic motions.
but it is known that there were three hours between the deaths of the two boys and the entry of dr. macnare at twelve thirty, and during those three hours he would have had a chance to recover, and to think, and to partially rationalize the nightmare he had experienced in realms outside what to him was the world of reality.
adam must certainly have been calm enough, rational enough, to recognize dr. macnare when he entered the study at twelve thirty.
then why did adam deliberately kill joe by breaking his neck? was it because, in that three hours, he had put together the evidence of his senses and come to the realization that he was not a man but a rat?
it's not likely. it is much more likely that adam came to some aberrated conclusion dictated by the superstitious feelings that had grown so strongly into his strange and unique existence, that dictated he must kill joseph.
for it would have been impossible for him to have realized that he was only a rat. you see, joseph macnare had taken great care that adam never, in all his life, should see another rat.
there remains only the end of adam to relate.
physically it can be only anticlimactic. with his metal body out of commission from a dozen or so shots, two of which destroyed the robot extensions of his eyes, he remained helpless until the coroner carefully removed him.
to the coroner he was just a white rat, and a strangely helpless one, unable to walk or stand as rats are supposed to. also a strangely vicious one, with red little beads of eyes and lips drawn back from sharp teeth the same as some rabid wild animal.
the coroner had no way of knowing that somewhere in that small, menacing form there was a noble but lost mentality that knew itself as adam, and held thoughts of a strange and wonderful realm of peace and splendor beyond the grasp of the normal physical senses.
the coroner could not know that the erratic motions of that small left front foot, if connected to the proper mechanisms, would have been audible as, perhaps, a prayer, a desperate plea to whatever lay in the great beyond to come down and rescue its humble creature.
"vicious little bastard," the coroner said nervously to the homicide men gathered around dr. macnare's desk.
"let me take care of it," said one of the detectives.
"no," the coroner answered. "i'll do it."
quickly, so as not to be bitten, he picked adam up by the tip of the tail and slammed him forcefully against the top of the desk.
the end
