in the land where you do as you please
bob and his comrade went straight to the mayor’s office; and to that august official fitz mee said:
“your honor, master taylor wishes to go through our factories.”
“so i’ve heard,” the mayor answered grimly, “but could hardly credit my ears.” then to bob: “master taylor, is this true that i hear: that you desire to go through our factories?”
“yes, sir,” bob replied respectfully but sturdily, rather wondering, however, why such an ado should be made over so small a matter.
“very well, fitz mee,” said the mayor to that worthy, “i’ll depend upon you to see that master taylor goes through our factories; and i’ll hold you responsible for any trouble that may arise. here’s your permit.”
when the two were out of the mayor’s presence and on their way to the factories, bob remarked:
[160]
“fitz, how did the mayor learn that i want to go through your machine-shops and places?”
“he heard us talking.”
“heard us talking?”
“yes. there’s a wireless telephone instrument in the room where we were, an automatic one that catches every sound.”
“oh!”
“yes.”
“and what did the mayor mean by saying he’d hold you responsible for any trouble that might arise?”
“oh, nothing—nothing!” fitz mee answered hastily and grumpily.
the boy questioned his companion no further, and soon they crossed one of the picturesque bridges spanning the brook, ascended a long, gentle slope to the base of the black cliffs, and stood before a wide, nail-studded door. to the officers on guard fitz mee presented the mayor’s permit. the guard deliberately and carefully read the slip of paper, then he lifted his brows, drew down the corners of his mouth and grunted pompously:
“fitz mee, you’re aware of the import of this official document, are you?”
fitz mee nodded gravely, grimly, and bob looked from one to the other in silent wonder.
bob and his comrade went straight to the mayor’s office.
[161]
the guard went on: “this permit of his honor, the mayor, says that not only is master robert taylor, the friend and comrade of the honorable fitz mee, hereby permitted to go through our factories, but by the same token is compelled to go through them, this being his expressed desire and pleasure; and that the honorable fitz mee shall be held responsible for any trouble that may thereby arise. that’s all right, is it, fitz mee?”
“it’s all right,” fitz mee muttered sullenly, but determinedly.
“pass in,” said the officer, unbolting the door and dragging it open.
as soon as the two had stepped over the sill, the door was slammed shut behind them, and bob heard the great bolts shot into place—and shuddered in spite of himself. on each side of him were smooth, solid walls of rock: ahead of him stretched a dusky corridor dimly lighted with electric fireflies suspended here and there. the dull rumble of distant machinery came to his ears; the faint smell of smoke and sulphurous fumes greeted him.
[162]
“fitz?” the lad said to his comrade, who stood silent at his side.
the goblin simply gave the speaker a look in reply.
“fitz,” bob continued, “what’s the meaning of all this talk about my going through the factories? what’s the matter, anyhow?”
“nothing—nothing!” fitz murmured hoarsely, shiftily gazing here and there.
“yes, there is,” the boy insisted. “why do you all emphasize the word ‘through’?”
“why—why,” fitz stammered, rubbing his nose and blinking his pop eyes, “we thought maybe you didn’t mean that you desired to go through the factories; thought maybe you meant you desired to go partly through only—just wanted to see some of the things.”
“no,” bob hastily made reply, “i want to go through; i want to see everything. understand?”
fitz nodded.
“well, come on, then,” he said; “we’ve got to be moving.”
as they went along the corridor, bob became aware of doors ahead opening to right and left. he saw the flash of flames and heard the whirr of wheels and the hub-bub of hammers.
“this room to the right,” said fitz mee, “is the machine-shop; that on the left is the forging-room.”
they visited each in turn, and the lad was delighted with all he saw.
[163]
“he! he!” he laughed when they were again out in the corridor and free from the thunder and crash and din that had almost deafened them. “the idea, fitz, of me not wanting to go through your factories; of not wanting to see everything! you bet i want to go through! you thought i’d be afraid—that’s what you thought; and the mayor, too. but i’ll show you; i’m no baby—not much!”
his companion grinned impishly, but made no reply.
the next place they entered was the great moulding-room. open cupolas were pouring forth white-hot streams of molten metal, which half-nude and sweaty, grimy goblins were catching in ladles and bearing here and there. the temperature of the room was almost unbearable; the atmosphere was poisonous with sulphurous gases. bob crossed the threshold and stopped.
“come on,” commanded his companion; “we must hurry along, or we won’t get through to-day.”
“i—i don’t believe i care to go through here,” bob said hesitatingly.
“why?” fitz mee jerked out.
“it’s so awful hot and smelly,” the boy explained; “and i’m—i’m a little afraid of all that hot metal.”
“no matter; you must go through here.”
“i must?” bob cried indignantly.
“certainly. you said you’d be pleased to go through our factories;[164] so now you must go through—through every apartment. boys in goblinville, you know, must do what pleases ’em.”
“but it doesn’t please me to go through this fiery furnace, fitz.”
“well, boys’re not allowed to change their minds every few minutes in goblinville. come on.”
“i won’t!” bob said obstinately.
“you’ll get into trouble, bob.”
“i don’t care.”
“and you’ll get me into trouble.”
“you into trouble? how?”
“you heard what the mayor said, didn’t you?”
“y-e-s.”
“well?”
“well, i’ll go through for your sake, fitz; but i don’t want to. it is a fool law or custom—or whatever it is—that won’t let a fellow change his mind once in a while, when he feels like it! a great way that is to let a boy do what he pleases! but lead on.”
they sauntered through the moulding—room, bob trembling and dodging and blinking, and out into the corridor again.
“mercy!” the urchin exclaimed, inhaling a deep breath of relief. “i don’t want any more of that! i’m all in a sweat and a tremble; i was afraid all the time some of that hot metal would splash on me.”
[165]
“it does splash on the workers at times,” fitz mee observed quietly.
not heeding his companion’s remark, bob continued: “and my lungs feel all stuffy. i couldn’t stand such a hot and smelly place more than a few minutes.”
“how do you suppose the moulders stand it for ten hours a day?” fitz asked.
“i don’t see how they do—and i don’t see why they do,” the boy replied.
“you don’t see why they do?”
“no, i don’t.”
“for the same reason workmen stand disagreeable and dangerous kinds of work in your country, bob; to earn a living.”
“i wouldn’t do it,” the boy declared loftily.
“you might have to, were you a grown man or goblin.”
“well, i wouldn’t. my papa doesn’t have to do anything of the kind.”
“your father’s a physician, isn’t he?”
“yes.”
“well, doesn’t he miss meals, and lose sleep, and worry over his patients, and work sometimes for weeks at a time without rest or peace of mind?”
“yes, he does.”
[166]
“but you’d rather do that than be a common laborer for eight or ten hours a day, would you?”
“i—i don’t know; i’d rather just be a boy and have fun all the time. and i guess i’ve seen enough of your factories, fitz; i want to get out into the fresh air and sunshine again.”
“you must go on through,” the goblin answered, quietly but positively.
“well, have we seen nearly all there is to see?”
“no, we’ve just begun; we haven’t seen one-tenth part yet.”
“oh, dear!” bob groaned. “i never can stand it, fitz; it’ll take us all day.”
“yes,” the goblin nodded.
“well, i tell you i can’t stand it.”
“but you must; it was your choice.”
“choice!” angrily. “i didn’t know what it would be like.”
“you shouldn’t have chosen so rashly. come on.”
bob demurred and pleaded, and whimpered a little, it must be confessed; but his guide was inexorable.
it is not necessary to enter into details in regard to all the boy saw, experienced and learned. let it suffice to say that at three o’clock that afternoon he was completely worn out with strenuous sight-seeing. the grating, rumbling, thundering sounds had made his head ache; the sights and smells had made his heart sick. he[167] had seen goblins, goblins, goblins—goblins sooty and grimed, goblins wizened and old before their time; goblins grinding out their lives in the cutlery factory; goblins inhaling poisonous fumes in the chemical works; goblins, like beasts of burden, staggering under heavy loads; goblins doing this thing, that thing and the other thing, that played havoc with their health and shortened their lives. and he was disgusted—nauseated with it all!
“oh, fitz!” he groaned. “i can’t go another step; i can’t stand it to see any more! i thought it would be pleasant; but—oh, dear!”
“sit down here and rest a minute,” fitz mee said, not unkindly, indicating a rough bench against the wall of the corridor. “now, why can’t you bear to see any more?”
“oh, it’s so awful!” the boy moaned. “i can’t bear to see ’em toiling and suffering, to see ’em so dirty and wretched.”
the goblin laughed outright.
“bob, you’re a precious donkey!” he cried. “true, the workers in the factories toil hard at dirty work—work that shortens their lives in some cases; but they’re inured to it, and they don’t mind it as much as you think. and what would you? all labor is hard, if one but thinks so; there are no soft snaps, if one does his duty. it’s the way of the goblin world, and it’s the way of the human world. all must labor, all must suffer more or less; there’s no escape for the highest or the lowest. and work has its compensation, has its reward; it—”
[168]
“oh, shut up!” the lad muttered petulantly. “i don’t want to hear any more. you talk just like my papa does. i wish i’d never been born, if i’ve got to grow up and work. so there!”
“you’ll never grow up, if you stay in goblinville, bob,” fitz mee said softly; but his pop eyes were twinkling humorously. “and you won’t have to work—not much, anyhow.”
bob sat soberly silent; evidently he was doing some deep thinking.
the goblin went on: “if you’re rested now, we’ll resume our sight-seeing.”
“i don’t want to see any more,” the lad grunted pugnaciously; “and i’m not going to, either.”
“yes, come on.”
“i won’t do it.”
“please do, bob.”
“i won’t, i say.”
“you’ll get us both into trouble.”
“i don’t care if i do.”
“they’ll send us to prison.”
“what!”
“they will.”
“who will?”
“the mayor and his officers.”
[169]
“send us both?”
“yes.”
“well,” bristling, “i guess they won’t send me—the old meddlers! they won’t dare to; i’m not a citizen of this country.”
“that won’t make any difference, bob!”
“it will too. if they send me to prison, the people of my country will come over here and—and lick ’em out of their boots. now!”
fitz mee bent double and stamped about the floor, laughing till the tears ran down his fat cheeks. but suddenly he sobered and said:
“come on, bob; you’ve got to.”
“i won’t!” the boy declared perversely. “i don’t have to.”
the goblin made no further plea; but placing a silver whistle to his lips blew a sharp blast. in answer, a squad of officers stepped from the shadows.
“what’s wanted, fitz mee?” said the leader.
“this boy flatly refuses to obey the law, to go on through the factories, as he stated would please him.”
“boy, is this true?” demanded the officer.
“yes, it is,” bob confessed fearlessly, shamelessly.
“fitz mee, he confesses,” muttered the officer. “what would you have me do?”
“take him and carry him through,” fitz mee said icily.
“very well,” answered the officer. “but if we do that we take[170] the case out of your hands, fitz mee. and in order to make a satisfactory report to the mayor, we’ll have to carry him through all the factories—those he has already visited as well as those he has not.”
“yes, that’s true,” fitz nodded.
“what’s that?” bob cried, keenly concerned.
the officer gravely repeated his statement.
“oh, nonsense!” the boy exclaimed. “you fellows go away and quit bothering me. i never saw such a country! a fine place for a boy to do as he pleases, surely! come on, fitz.”
all the goblins laughed heartily, and bob disrespectfully made faces at them, to their increased amusement.
when the two comrades had made their round of the factories, and were out in the fresh air again, the boy murmured meekly, a sob in his throat:
“fitz, i’m tired—i’m sick of it all! i wish i hadn’t come here, i—i wish i was back home again.”
“what!” his companion cried in assumed surprise.
“i do!”
[171]
“back home, and be compelled to obey your elders—your parents and your teachers?” fitz mee said, grinning and winking impishly.
“well,”—pettishly,—“it wouldn’t be any worse than being compelled to obey a lot of fool officers, anyhow.”
“you’re just compelled to do what pleases you, just as i told you,” fitz mee explained smoothly.
“oh, do shut up!” the lad pouted.
“you’re out of sorts,” the goblin giggled; “you’re hungry—you need some food tablets.”
“bah!” bob gagged. “pills! i can’t swallow any more of ’em—i just can’t! oh, i wish i had a good supper like mother cooks!”
fitz mee threw himself prone and kicked and pounded the earth, laughing and whooping boisterously; and bob stood and stared at him, in silent disapproval and disgust.
