within the first few days, a great many of these conversations took place, and frances gradually formed an idea to herself—not, perhaps, very like reality, but yet an idea—of the other life from which her sister had come. the chief figure in it was “mamma,” the mother with whom constance was so carelessly familiar, and of whom she herself knew nothing at all. frances did not learn from her sister’s revelations to love her mother. the effect was very different from that which, in such circumstances, might have been looked for. she came to look upon this unknown representative of “the parents’ side,” as constance said, as upon a sort of natural opponent, one who understood but little and sympathised not at all with the younger, the other faction, the generation which was to succeed and replace her. of this fact the other girl never concealed her easy con{v1-195}viction. the elders for the moment had the power in their hands, but by-and-by their day would be over. there was nothing unkind or cruel in this certainty; it was simply the course of nature: by-and-by their sway would be upset by the natural progress of events, and in the meantime it was modified by the other certainty, that if the young stood firm, the elders had no alternative but to give in. altogether, it was evident the parents’ side was not the winning side; but all the same it had the power of annoying the other to a very great extent, and exercised this power with a selfishness which was sometimes brutal. mamma, it was evident, had not considered constance at all. she had taken her about into society for her own ends, not for her daughter’s pleasure: and, finally, she had formed a plan by which constance was to be handed over to another proprietor without any consultation of her own wishes.
the heart of frances sank as she slowly identified this maternal image, so different from that which fancy and nature suggest. she tried to compare it with the image which she herself might in her turn have communicated of her{v1-196} father, had it been she who was the expositor. it frightened her to find, as she tried this experiment in her own mind, that the representation of papa would not have been much more satisfactory. she would have shown him as passing his time chiefly in his library, taking very little notice of her tastes and wishes, settling what was to be done, where to go, everything that was of any importance in their life, without at all taking into account what she wished. this she had always felt to be perfectly natural, and she had no feeling of a grievance in the matter; but supposing it to be necessary to tell the story to an ignorant person, what would that ignorant person’s opinion be? it gave her a great shock to perceive that the impression produced would also be one of harsh authority, indifferent, taking no note of the inclinations of those who were subject to it. that was how constance would understand papa. it was not the case, and yet it would look so to one who did not know. perceiving this, frances came to feel that it might be natural to represent the world as consisting of two factions, parents and children. there was a certain truth in it. if{v1-197} there should happen to occur any question—which was impossible—between papa and herself, she felt sure that it would be very difficult for him to realise that she had a will of her own; and yet frances was very conscious of having a will of her own.
in this way she learned a great many things vaguely through the talk of her sister. she learned that balls and other entertainments, such as, to her inexperienced fancy, had seemed nothing but pleasure, were not in reality intended, at least as their first object, for pleasure at all. constance spoke of them as things to which one must go. “we looked in for an hour,” she would say. “mamma thinks she ought to have half-a-dozen places to go to every evening,” with a tone in which there was more sense of injury than pleasure. then there was the mysterious question of love, which was at once so simple and so awful a matter, on which there could be no doubt or question: that, it appeared, was quite a complicated affair, in which the lover, the hero, was transferred into “the man,” whose qualities had to be discovered and considered, as if he were a candidate for a pub{v1-198}lic office. all this bewildered frances more than can be imagined or described. her sister’s arrival, and the disclosures involved in it, had broken up to her all the known lines of heaven and earth; and now that everything had settled down again, and these lines were beginning once more to be apparent, frances felt that though they were wider, they were narrower too. she knew a great deal more; but knowledge only made that appear hard and unyielding which had been elastic and infinite. the vague and imaginary were a great deal more lovely than this, which, according to her sister’s revelation, was the real and true.
another very curious experience for frances occurred when mrs durant and mrs gaunt, as in duty bound, and moved with lively curiosity, came to call and make acquaintance with mr waring’s new daughter. constance regarded these visitors with languid curiosity, only half rising from her chair to acknowledge her introduction to them, and leaving frances to answer the questions which they thought it only civil to put. did she like bordighera?
“oh yes; well enough,” constance replied.{v1-199}
“my sister thinks the people not so picturesque as she expected,” said frances.
“but of course she felt the delightful difference in the climate?” people, mrs durant understood, were suffering dreadfully from east wind in london.
“ah! one doesn’t notice in town,” said constance.
“my sister is not accustomed to living without comforts and with so little furniture. you know that makes a great difference,” said her anxious expositor and apologist.
and then there would ensue a long pause, which the new-comer did nothing at all to break: and then the conversation fell into the ordinary discussion of who was at church on sunday, how many new people from the hotels, and how disgraceful it was that some who were evidently english should either poke into the roman catholic places or never go to church at all.
“it comes to the same thing, indeed,” mrs durant said, indignantly; “for when they go to the native place of worship, they don’t understand. even i, that have been so long on the continent, i can’t follow the service.{v1-200}”
“but papa can,” said tasie.
“ah, papa—papa is much more highly educated than i could ever pretend to be; and besides, he is a theologian, and knows. there were quite half-a-dozen people, evidently english, whom i saw with my own eyes coming out of the chapel on the marina. oh, don’t say anything, tasie! i think, in a foreign place, where the english have a character to keep up, it is quite a sin.”
“you know, mamma, they think nobody knows them,” tasie said.
mrs gaunt did not care so much who attended church; but when she found that constance had, as she told the general, “really nothing to say for herself,” she too dropped into her habitual mode of talk. she did her best in the first place to elicit the opinions of constance about bordighera and the climate, about how she thought mr waring looking, and if dear frances was not far stronger than she used to be. but when these judicious inquiries failed of a response, mrs gaunt almost turned her back upon constance. “i have had a letter from katie, my dear,” she said.{v1-201}
“have you indeed? i hope she is quite well—and the babies?”
“oh, the babies; they are always well. but poor katie, she has been a great sufferer. i told you she had a touch of fever, by last mail. now it is her liver. you are never safe from your liver in india. she had been up to the hills, and there she met douglas, who had gone to settle his wife and children. his wife is a poor little creature, always ailing; and their second boy—— but, dear me, i have not told you my great news! frances—george is coming home! he is coming by brindisi and venice, and will be here directly. i told him i was sure all my kind neighbours would be so glad to see him; and it will be so nice for him—don’t you think?—to see italy on his way.”
“oh, very nice,” said frances. “and you must be very happy, both the general and you.”
“the general does not say much, but he is just as happy as i am. fancy! by next mail! in another week!” the poor lady dried her eyes, and added, laughing, sobbing, “only think—in a week—my youngest boy!”
“do you mean to say,” said constance, when{v1-202} mrs gaunt was gone, “that you have made them believe you care? oh, that is exactly like mamma. she makes people think she is quite happy and quite miserable about their affairs, when she does not care one little bit! what is this woman’s youngest son to you?”
“but she is—— i have been here all my life. i am glad that she should be happy,” cried frances, suddenly placed upon her defence.
when she thought of it, mrs gaunt’s youngest boy was nothing at all to her; nor did she care very much whether all the english in the hotels on the marina went to church. but mrs gaunt was interested in the one, and the durants in the other. and was it true what constance said, that she was a humbug, that she was a deceiver, because she pretended to care? frances was much confused by this question. there was something in it: perhaps it was true. she faltered as she replied, “do you think it is wrong to sympathise? it is true that i don’t feel all that for myself. but still it is not false, for i do feel it for them—in a sort of a way.”
“and that is all the society you have here? the clergywoman and the old soldier. and{v1-203} will they expect me, too, to feel for them—in a sort of a way?”
“dear constance,” said frances, in a pleading tone, “it could never be quite the same, you know; because you are a stranger, and i have known them ever since i was quite a little thing. they have all been very kind to me. they used to have me to tea; and tasie would play with me; and mrs gaunt brought down all her indian curiosities to amuse me. oh, you don’t know how kind they are! i wonder, sometimes, when i see all the carved ivory things, and remember how they were taken out from under the glass shades for me, a little thing, how i didn’t break them, and how dear mrs gaunt could trust me with them! and then tasie——”
“tasie! what a ridiculous name! but it suits her well enough. she must be forty, i should think.”
“her right name is anastasia. she is called after the countess of denrara, who is her godmother,” said frances, with great gravity. she had heard this explanation a great many times from mrs durant, and unconsciously repeated it in something of the same tone. constance{v1-204} received this with a sudden laugh, and clapped her hands.
“i didn’t know you were a mimic. that is capital. do tasie now. i am sure you can; and then we shall have got a laugh out of them at least.”
“what do you mean?” asked frances, growing pale. “do you think i would laugh at them? when you know how really good they are——”
“oh yes; i suppose i shall soon know,” said constance, opening her mouth in a yawn, which frances thought would have been dreadful in any one else, but which, somehow, was rather pretty in her. everything was rather pretty in her, even her little rudenesses and impertinences. “if i stay here, of course i shall have to be intimate with them, as you have been. and must i take a tender interest in the youngest boy? let us see! he will be a young soldier probably, as his mother is an old one, and as he is coming from india. he will never have seen any one. he is bound to take one of us for a goddess, either you or me.{v1-205}”
“constance!” cried frances, in her consternation raising her voice.
“well,” said her sister, “is there anything wonderful in that? we are very different types, and till we see the hero, we shall not be able to tell which he is likely to prefer. i see my way to a little diversion, if you will not be too puritanical, fan. that never does a man any harm. it will rouse him up; it will give him something to think of. a place like this can’t have much amusement, even for a youngest boy. we shall make him enjoy himself. his mother will bless us. you know, everybody says it is part of education for a man.”
frances looked at her sister with eyes bewildered, somewhat horrified, full of disapproval; while constance, roused still more by her sister’s horror than by the first mischievous suggestion which had awakened her from her indifference, laughed, and woke up into full animation. “we will go and return their visits,” she said, “and i will be sympathetic too. but you shall see, when i take up a part, i make much more of it than you do. i know who these people{v1-206} were who did not go to church. they were my people—the people i travelled with; and they shall go next sunday, and tasie’s heart shall rejoice. when we call, i will let them know that england, even at bordighera, expects every man—and every woman, which is more to the purpose—and that their absence was remarked. they will never be absent again, fan. and as for the other interest, i shall inquire all about katie’s illnesses, and secure the very last intelligence about the youngest boy. she will show me his photograph. she will tell me stories of how he cut his first tooth. i wonder,” said constance, suddenly pausing and falling back into the old languid tone, “whether you will take up my old ways, when you are with mamma.”
“i shall never have it in my power to try,” said frances. “mamma will never want me.” she was a little shy of using that name.
“don’t you know the condition, then? i think you don’t half know our story. papa behaved rather absurdly, but honestly too. when they separated, he settled that one of us should always be with her, and one of us{v1-207} with him. he had the right to have taken us both. men have more rights than women. we belong to him, but we don’t belong to her. i don’t see the reason of it, but still that is law. he allowed her to have one of us always. i daresay he thought two little things like what we were then would have been a bore to him. at all events, that is how it was settled. now it does not need much cleverness to see, that as i have left her, she will probably claim you. she will not let papa off anything he has promised. she likes a girl in the house. she will say, ‘send me frances.’ i should like to hide behind a door or under a table, and see how you get on.”
“i am sure you must be mistaken,” said frances, much disturbed; “there was never any question about me.”
“no; because i was there. oh yes; there was often question of you. mamma has a little picture of you as you were when you were taken away. it always hangs in her room; and when i had to be scolded, she used to apostrophise you. she used to say, ‘that little angel would never have done so-and-so.{v1-208}’ i did, for i was a little demon; so i rather hated you. she will send for you now; and i wonder if you will be a little angel still. i should like to see how you get on. but i shall be fully occupied here driving people to church, and making things pleasant for the old soldier’s youngest son.”
“i wish you would not talk so wildly,” said frances. “you are laughing at me all the time. you think i am such a simpleton, i will believe all you say. and indeed i am not clever enough to understand when you are laughing at me. all this is impossible. that i should take your place, and that you should take mine—oh, impossible!” cried frances, with a sharper certainty than ever, as that last astounding idea made itself apparent: that constance should order papa’s dinners and see after the mayonnaise, and guide mariuccia—“oh, impossible!” she cried.
“nothing is impossible. you think i am not good enough to do the housekeeping for papa. i only hope you will s’en tirer of the difficulties of my place, as i shall of yours. be a kind girl, and write to me, and tell me{v1-209} how things go. i know what will happen. you will think everything charming at first; and then—— but don’t let markham get hold of you. markham is very nice. he is capital for getting you out of a scrape; but still, i should not advise you to be guided by him, especially as you are papa’s child, and he is not fond of papa.”
“please don’t say any more,” cried frances. “i am not going—anywhere. i shall live as i have always done; but only more pleasantly from having—you.”
“that is very pretty of you,” said constance, turning round to look at her; “if you are sure you mean it, and that it is not only true—in a sort of a way. i am afraid i have been nothing but a bore, breaking in upon you like this. it would be nice if we could be together,” she added, very calmly, as if, however, no great amount of philosophy would be necessary to reconcile her to the absence of her sister. “it would be nice; but it will not be allowed. you needn’t be afraid, though, for i can give you a number of hints which will make it much easier. mamma is a little—she is just a little{v1-210}—but i should think you would get on with her. you look so young, for one thing. she will begin your education over again, and she likes that; and then you are like her, which will give you a great pull. it is very funny to think of it; it is like a transformation scene; but i daresay we shall both get on a great deal better than you think. for my part, i never was the least afraid.”
with this, constance sank into her chair again, and resumed the book she had been reading, with that perfect composure and indifference which filled frances with admiration and dismay.
it was with difficulty that frances herself kept her seat or her self-command at all. she had been drawing, making one of those innumerable sketches which could be made from the loggia: now of a peak among the mountains; now of the edge of foam on the blue, blue margin of the sea; now of an olive, now of a palm. frances had a consistent conscientious way of besieging nature, forcing her day by day to render up the secret of another tint, another shadow. it was thus she had come{v1-211} to the insight which had made her father acknowledge that she was “growing up.” but to-day her hand had no cunning. her pulses beat so tumultuously that her pencil shared the agitation, and fluttered too. she kept still as long as she could, and spoiled a piece of paper, which to frances, with very little money to lose, was something to be thought of. and when she had accomplished this, and added to her excitement the disagreeable and confusing effect of failure in what she was doing, frances got up abruptly and took refuge in the household concerns, in directions about the dinner, and consultations with mariuccia, who was beginning to be a little jealous of the signorina’s absorption in her new companion. “if the young lady is indeed your sister, it is natural she should have a great deal of your attention; but not even for that does one desert one’s old friends,” mariuccia said, with a little offended dignity.
frances felt, with a sinking of the heart, that her sister’s arrival had been to her perhaps less an unmixed pleasure than to any of the household. but she did not say so. she{v1-212} made no exhibition of the trouble in her bosom, which even the consultations over the mayonnaise did not allay. that familiar duty indeed soothed her for the moment. the question was whether it should be made with chicken or fish—a very important matter. but though this did something to relieve her, the culinary effort did not last. to think of being sent away into that new world in which constance had been brought up—to leave everything she knew—to meet “mamma,” whose name she whispered to herself almost trembling, feeling as if she took a liberty with a stranger,—all this was bewildering, wonderful, and made her heart beat and her head ache. it was not altogether that the anticipation was painful. there was a flutter of excitement in it which was almost delight; but it was an alarmed delight, which shook her nerves as much as if it had been unmixed terror. she could not compose herself into indifference as constance did, or sit quietly down to think, or resume her usual occupation, in the face of this sudden opening out before her of the unforeseen and unknown.
