she was a phantom of delight
when first she gleamed upon my sight;
a lovely apparition, sent
to be a moment’s ornament. . . .
i saw her, upon nearer view,
a spirit, yet a woman too!
her household motions light and free,
and steps of virgin-liberty. . .
a perfect woman, nobly planned,
to warn, to comfort, and command;
and yet a spirit still, and bright
with something of an angel-light.
wordsworth.
“the gloom, which had for some time been lowering darkly round our house, now burst over our heads with the fury of a thunder-storm. you must often have observed, sir, that as all the little ailments of a man’s body, which singly are insignificant enough, gradually combine together, and produce death; so the misfortunes of life, long kept at a distance, seem at last to come upon an individual or a family with one united assault, and press it with irresistible force to the very ground. so it was with us. my father, habitually silent and reserved, began to talk more, especially to strangers, and to show a greater liveliness of manner than we had ever observed in him before. he spoke about the value of his land, and the produce of his crops, in a way to make me think that i had a very comfortable prospect of inheritance before me, and i considered myself already as one of the established statesmen of the valley. alas! how puzzling is poor human nature! at the very time when my father seemed most to rejoice in his possessions, he had just come to the conviction that he could no longer retain them. he had never really felt their value till they were about to pass away from him and his race for ever! his p. 88father had been a somewhat expensive man in his habits, and had mortgaged his little estate to the father of tom hebblethwaite, in the hope, as times were then very good, of quickly redeeming it. but worse times soon succeeded; and my poor father and mother, with all their care and industry, were not able even to pay the interest of the sum borrowed, so that the debt gradually increased in amount, and the unavoidable issue was clearly foreseen. this disheartening news my father took a quiet opportunity of communicating to me, my poor mother standing by, and the silent tears rolling down her cheeks—not for herself, but for her children.
“‘my dear lad,’ said he, ‘you must fend for yourself. i have engaged that you shall become apprentice to an engraver in manchester, who is a distant relation of your mother’s, and, i am told, in a very thriving condition. your mother and i have given you learning, and we hope, good principles; we had wished to have given you more, but god’s will be done.’
“a change now came over the whole course of my thoughts. it was like telling me that i was to pass my days in another world, so little notion had i of anything that was going on beyond the boundaries of my native mountains; and i speculated, and wondered, till my mind became confused and perplexed, and i was unable to attend to even the commonest concerns of life. i will hasten over this distressing period, for it is too painful to dwell on, even at this distance of time. i believe that age magnifies the anxieties that are far off, as much as it deadens the pain of those that are near. the recollection to me now, is more grievous than was the reality at the time. robert walker took leave of me with much sound advice, but with a cheerfulness that removed much of my horror—for that was what i felt—at leaving, probably for ever, my native hills.
“‘my good lad,’ said he, ‘you are only about to do what thousands have done before you—leave these barren mountains for a scene of usefulness to which you are evidently called by your heavenly father. many of my p. 89flock have gone before you in the same path, and most of them, i thank god, have been highly successful in their labours. some of the highest and richest merchants in manchester drew their first breath in these humble valleys, and were taught at my village school. having here been taught the lessons of frugality, industry, and attention to religious duties, they were thus trained for the after-toils of life, and have become an honour to their country and their church. but as for you, i would rather see you good than rich. the one, with god’s grace, you can be; the other may depend on a thousand accidents. i have prepared a little present for you, which i trust you will always cherish as proof of my good will. the bible i know you have, and its fitting companion and interpreter, the prayer-book: here is ‘nelson’s companion to the fasts and festivals of the church of england,’ the best book, next to the prayer-book, that the uninspired mind of man ever compiled; full of learning, full of piety, full of prayer. know this book well, and you will be wiser than your teachers; for to understand and retain in one’s mind the contents of one such book as this, is better than to read whole libraries, and to have but a dim and misty recollection of them all; and here is another good book, which you will find a valuable companion to you in some of your silent and solitary hours—‘the whole duty of man.’ blessed be the memory of the pious lady who wrote it! and may the blessing of god rest for ever on the family which sheltered the saintly hammond in his persecutions, and produced her who left to the world this invaluable legacy! [89] in these books you have a religious library which will meet all your spiritual wants. pray for me, as i shall not cease to pray for you—for this is the way to remember friends that are far off; and now go, and the lord be with thee!’
“but i had another parting of a very different kind to encounter—with my poor sister martha. since her separation from her lover, she had gone about her daily avocations with her usual, and even more than her usual p. 90cheerfulness and quiet alacrity. indeed her eye sparkled with more brilliance, and her spirits rose to a higher pitch of excitement than i had ever before observed. she grew perceptibly thinner, but no alarm was thereby occasioned, as her colour was even heightened in brightness, and her mind seemed peaceful and happy. yet i had watched her with more than common anxiety, and felt much alarmed for her state, though i could hardly assign the grounds of my fears. a few days before it was proposed that i should take my departure, she called me into her room after the rest of the family had retired to rest, and desired me to sit down by her side, with a seriousness of manner which seemed to show that she had some important communication to make.
“‘brother,’ said she, ‘we part soon; it may be sooner than you expect.’
“‘how so?’ said i.
“‘you must listen to my tale. we have never talked about him since we parted at mr. walker’s. i have never repented what i did then.’
“‘oh, how nobly you acted, dear sister,’ said i, ‘and how little you seem to have felt the shock of such a parting. how i love you for your determination! you have never seen him since?’
“‘i saw him last night!’
“‘indeed?’
“‘yes—last night. he stood by my bed-side, looking most pale and ghastly; and reproached me with deserting him, and leaving him to his fate. he said that i might have saved him by converting him from his evil ways, but now on me must rest the consequences of his ruin, both in body and soul.’
“‘it must surely have been a troubled dream!’
“‘no, brother, it was a sad reality. i appeared to myself as wide awake as i am at this moment, and though my reason tells me that he could not be there, i saw him with as sober a mind, and an eye as steady as i see you now!’
“‘and how do you explain this strange delusion?’
p. 91“‘easily—i am dying! look at this hand,’ said she, holding up her taper fingers before the candle. i could distinctly see the flame through the transparent skin, and trace the blue fret-work of the veins, as though they had been traced with a lead pencil on a sheet of white paper. i saw that all was over!
“‘brother,’ said she, ‘i do not regret my past conduct in this matter; on the contrary, i rejoice in it as the only proof of fidelity that i have been permitted to give to the law of my divine master. could i believe that i might have saved him—but no, i will not think it possible! i was not to do evil that good might come. my bible, robert walker, and my own heart approve of what i have done; and if i die for it, it may be that i shall live for it (through my saviour’s blood) hereafter. brother, pray for me! i dread the coming night; but i trust to the lord’s power to drive away from my pillow evil thoughts, and evil spirits. my mind begins to wander—i must to prayer. come to me early to-morrow morning. good night, and god bless you!’
“i went early according to her request, anxious to hear her report of the past night, and sincerely praying that it might have been more peaceful than my own. i stood by her bed-side, and called her name: all was still. i opened her window-curtain (bed-curtain there was none) and gazed on her face. she was dead! her hands were folded peacefully on her breast, showing that she had passed away in prayer, and there was a faint—a very faint—smile still lingering on her lips, as though at the very moment when she closed her eyes on earth she had just caught a glimpse of heaven.—poor martha!” [91]
after a pause, the old man proceeded—“i will say no more of my final parting, because i would avoid my p. 92mother’s name. behold me then in salford! hard at work from morning till night, breathing the dense and foggy air of hanging-ditch, instead of the pure and invigorating breezes of tilberthwaite and yewdale. much have i learnt, from sad experience, during my long life, of the condition of the labouring classes in this busy hive of men, and much could i tell you of cruelty on the part of masters, and of ingratitude and improvidence on the part of men. but i will keep these matters for another occasion. suffice it to say, that i believe a manufacturing state may and will become (though it may be neither in my time nor yours) quite as happy and as healthy a one as that of the best-regulated agricultural district. but, sir, the reformation must begin at the other end—it must be from the top first, and then to the bottom! i will tell you a little secret—the men, as a body, are quite as well educated for their station in life, as the masters, as a body, are for theirs. the next generation may see masters who have been brought up to the trade of masters, and not merely men who have become masters by good fortune; and then may we hope for a thorough reform in the whole system of conduct of masters and men towards each other; of which, till then, i almost despair. meantime, if the church had fair play, she would throw her healing branch into the bitter waters which surround us, and teach mutual love and forbearance to ‘all sorts and conditions of men.’”
“i fully agree with you,” said i; “we have heard much of late of the want of education among the poor; i hope we shall hear, soon, of the necessity of a better system of education among the rich. but, my good old friend, you are quite forgetting that your tale is about anything else than that with which it professed to begin, ‘the old church clock.’”
“right! my dear sir; like many other old men i have allowed my tongue to out-run my tale. well, sir, sunday came—a day of joy to me, both as a rest from unusual labour, and as an opportunity of pouring out my soul p. 93in prayer in the manner that i used to do in my native mountains; so that i looked to be reminded of my temporal and eternal home, by joining once more in the same form of worship with my absent parents, and my good old pastor, robert walker. little do they know of the beauty of a prescribed form of prayer who have never offered it up in a distant land! alas! how were my hopes and expectations disappointed! i naturally entered the first place of worship within my reach, expecting it to be, like seathwaite chapel, free and open to all comers. but i was woefully mistaken! a well-cloaked and liveried beadle soon informed me that there was no room for strangers, and that the aisle was the only place for me. it was true that i had this advantage over the sleepers in the well-cushioned pews around me, that i could kneel in prayer to god, whilst the rest were compelled to sit in his presence while they asked him to forgive them their sins! still it was most painful to me to worship in communion with those to whom my joining with them in prayer was an unwelcome act; and i now felt myself really a solitary amidst crowds, when, not even in the presence of our common father, had they any sympathy with their homeless brother! well, sir, time passed on; and among my smaller grievances was the occasionally receiving, and indeed deserving a reprimand from my over-looker, for having been behind my time in a morning, at the early hour at which the work of our establishment commenced. six was the precise hour; and even a minute behind that time subjected the truant to a serious fine. i well remember, one cold wintry morning, looking anxiously for the first sight of the old church clock, as i crossed the salford bridge into manchester, and saw, to my horror, that it pointed to exactly five minutes past that hour. there seemed to my imagination an expression of strong displeasure in the hard outlines of that old clock’s face, which administered a far stronger rebuke to me than the violent and unfeeling language which was addressed to me by the over-looker; and i resolved, if it were possible, not to fall into the p. 94same disgrace again. the next morning i was, by the same clock, ten minutes before my time. the old clock seemed to smile at my punctuality, as i do now at the recollection. how apt is the youthful mind to put a portion of its own overflowing life even into inanimate things! and what dead thing is so like a living one as a clock?”
