6
mostly about gussy
it was fun settling in at quarry cottage. mrs cunningham was pleased and happy. she hadn’t beenlooking forward to a holiday for seven people, five of them children, knowing that she would haveto do everything for them, and that perhaps the shopping would be difficult.
but it was easy. the village was not too far away, even for walking purposes. the farmhousewas willing to supply a wonderful selection of good food. mrs gump, the tiny little charwoman,came every day, and was cheerful and hardworking. she also liked children, which was a greatblessing.
she didn’t like gussy, though. ‘he orders me about, that one,’ she complained. ‘he evenwanted me to go upstairs and fetch his handkerchief for him, mam. he’s staying with you, isn’the? well, i’m not going to be ordered about by anyone, specially not little nippers like that.’
gussy was very difficult those first days. he didn’t like this and he didn’t like that. hecomplained if he was given a cracked plate. he absolutely refused to make his bed, though it was arule in the house that everyone should make their own.
‘i do not make beds,’ he announced, in his haughtiest manner. ‘mrs gump shall make my bed.’
‘mrs gump shall not,’ said dinah, firmly. ‘you go and make your own – and for goodness’
sake don’t make such a fuss, gussy.’
‘fussy-gussy, fussy-gussy!’ chanted kiki, in delight. ‘fussy-gussy, fussy …’
gus caught up a book and flung it at kiki. the bird dodged easily, sat on the back of a chair andcackled with laughter. gus was just about to pick up another book when he found himself on hisback on the floor.
dinah had put up with enough from gussy. she had now lost her temper, and was showing himhow well she could do it! she banged his head on the floor, and he yelled the place down.
mrs cunningham came in at once. ‘dinah! what are you thinking of? get up at once. goupstairs and stay there till i come to you.’
‘he flung a book at kiki,’ panted dinah, rising up red and angry. gussy still lay on the floor,and the tears ran down his cheeks.
‘get up, gussy,’ said mrs cunningham. ‘i’m just as cross with you as i am with dinah. go upto your room too, and stay there.’
‘you cannot order me,’ said gussy, with as much dignity as he could manage through his tears.
‘send this girl back home. and that wicket bird.’
‘ go to your room !’ said mrs cunningham in such a furious voice that gussy leapt to his feet,tore up the stairs, went into his room, slammed the door and turned the key!
bill came in. ‘it’s gussy again,’ said his wife. ‘he’s such a little fathead. i hope this is going towork out all right, bill. i think we should have thought of some other idea. the others don’tunderstand, you see. can’t we tell them?’
‘i’ll have a word with gussy again,’ said bill. ‘if he doesn’t come to heel i’ll take him away bymyself – but i thought it would be so much safer if he was here with all of us.’
he went upstairs. mrs cunningham also went up to dinah. lucy-ann was with her, arrangingthe clothes in the drawers. dinah was very mutinous.
‘it’s all very well,’ she said, when her mother scolded her, ‘but why should gussy spoileverything for us? he’s always interfering, always ordering us about, always wanting the best ofeverything for himself – and fancy daring to try and hurt kiki!’
‘i understand how you all feel,’ said her mother. ‘so does bill. but he’s promised to keep aneye on gussy for the next few weeks, and he must. i think perhaps it would be best if he tookgussy off somewhere, and left us here by ourselves.’
‘oh, no,’ said lucy-ann at once. ‘no, aunt allie! you’ve married him, and he belongs to usnow. please don’t let him do that! dinah, say something!’
‘well – i thought, i could put up with gussy, rather than have bill leave us,’ said dinah. ‘but –but – oh dear, i can’t promise not to go for gussy. i don’t think i’ll be able to stop myself! and ican’t possibly let bill go away either.’
‘well, stay here by yourself for an hour and make up your mind,’ said her mother, losingpatience. ‘lucy-ann, come downstairs with me.’
nobody told jack or philip about gussy flinging a book at kiki. kiki didn’t forget though! sheplagued the life out of poor gussy! he never knew when she was under the table ready to tweakhis toes at the end of his sandals. he never knew when she would hide in his bedroom and wait forhim to come up. then she would produce one of her extraordinary noises and send him downstairsin a panic at top speed!
‘well, if bill didn’t punish him – and i don’t think he did – kiki’s doing it all right!’ said dinahto lucy-ann. ‘anyway, gussy is certainly better. i wish he wasn’t coming on the picnic with ustoday, though.’
a picnic had been arranged for everyone on sugar-loaf hill. it was really the name that hadattracted the children – sugar-loaf hill! what a lovely name!
they set off together, bill and the boys carrying the food in satchels on their backs. gus hadmade a fuss, of course. he seemed to think that it was a great indignity to carry something on hisback.
‘never haf i done this before,’ he protested. ‘in my country it is the – how do you call it? –donkeys who carry for us. why do you not haf donkeys? i will not be a donkey.’
he was puzzled at the shouts of laughter that greeted this speech. ‘oh, gus – you’ll be the deathof me,’ said jack. ‘do you mean to say you didn’t know you were a donkey?’
‘it is bad to call me that,’ said gussy, frowning. ‘in my country you would …’
‘oh, gee-up, donkey, and stop fussing,’ said philip, giving gussy a shove. ‘leave your satchelbehind, if you like. no one will mind. it’s got your lunch in, but nobody else’s! we’re carrying thegirls’ lunch, and bill’s got mother’s. you’ve only got your own.’
‘so chuck it into the bushes, then you won’t have to carry it like a donkey,’ said dinah, with asqueal of laughter. ‘go on, gus!’
but gus didn’t. he thought better of it, and took the satchel of food on his back, though helooked extremely annoyed about it.
sugar-loaf hill was just like its name – it was very like a sugar-loaf, cone shaped but flat at thetop, and was covered with primroses, cowslips and dog-violets.
‘we ought to be able to see quite a good way from the top,’ said jack, as they toiled up. it was astiff pull up but at last they were at the top. a strong breeze blew round them, but the sun was hot,so it was very pleasant to feel the wind blowing by.
‘i say! gussy carried his lunch after all!’ said jack, pretending to be surprised. ‘my word, i’mhungry.’
they all were. they ate every single thing they had brought, and kiki had a good share, too,especially of the bananas. she loved holding a banana in one foot and biting big pieces off it.
gussy sneezed. kiki immediately sneezed too, a much bigger sneeze than gussy’s. then gussysniffed, a little habit he had which annoyed mrs cunningham very much.
kiki sniffed too. ‘stop it, kiki,’ said mrs cunningham. ‘one sniffer is quite enough.’
‘polly’s got a cold,’ said kiki, and sniffed again, exactly like gussy. gussy took no notice butafter a minute he suddenly sniffed again.
‘blow your nose!’ shouted kiki. ‘where’s your hanky! gussy’s got a cold, send for …’
‘be quiet, kiki,’ said jack. ‘gussy, don’t keep sniffing. if you do, you’ll set kiki off and she’lldo nothing but sniff too.’
‘i do not sniff,’ said gussy. ‘that bird is wicket and too clever. it should have a cage.’
‘shut up, gus,’ said bill, who was now leaning back, enjoying a pipe. ‘remember what i saidto you.’
gus apparently remembered. he subsided and lay back and closed his eyes. the others sat andlooked at the view. it was marvellous, for they could see a great way off.
‘that’s the village over there,’ said philip, pointing. ‘and there’s the farmhouse. and you canjust see the tops of the chimneys and a bit of one end of the thatched roof belonging to quarrycottage. in those trees, look.’
‘and there’s the road we came by – the main road,’ said jack. ‘where are my field glasses?
would you pass them, di. gosh, i can see miles with these. i can see the way the main road twistsand turns; i can see the traffic on it – looking just as small as the toy cars we used to have, philip.
have a look.’
philip put the glasses to his eyes. they really were magnificent ones. he could see for miles,just as jack had said. ‘yes – it’s queer to see the cars and the lorries looking like toys, going alongthose ribbony roads,’ said philip. ‘now – there’s a black car – rather like bill’s. i’m going towatch it and see how far i can follow it.’
the others lay back, half asleep, listening to philip’s voice. the sun was hot now, and theydidn’t feel inclined to go walking after such a big picnuc,‘yes – it’s on the main road still,’ said philip, staring through the glasses. ‘there it goes – agood speed too. jolly good speed. may be a police car, perhaps.’
‘you can’t tell a police car so far away,’ said jack. bill looked up from his newspaper. he knewa lot about police cars!
‘tell me its number and i’ll tell you if it’s a police car,’ he said. the boys laughed.
‘that’s clever of you, bill,’ said jack, ‘but you know jolly well you’re safe – you can’t possiblyread the number at this distance. still got the car, philip?’
‘lost it for a bit,’ said philip. ‘it’s gone behind some buildings – no, there it is again. it’s cometo crossroads – it’s gone across. now it’s stopped.’
gussy gave a little snore which kiki immediately copied. philip went on with his car story.
‘a man got out – i think he must have gone back to look at the sign post. he’s got into the caragain. yes, they missed their way, they’re backing. ah, i thought so – they’ve turned down theother road – the road that leads to our village.’
‘you’ll tell us it’s at quarry cottage next,’ said jack, sleepily. you’re making all this up now, ibet!’
‘i’ve lost it again. no, here it comes,’ said philip, pleased. yes, it’s going through the village –down into the lane. it’s stopped again. i think they’re asking the way from someone – a labourerprobably. can’t see from here. on they go again – and they’ve turned up the farm road! they’regoing to the farmhouse. probably rich relations of mrs ellis.’
bill put down his paper abruptly and reached out for the glasses. he focused them on thefarmhouse and saw the car immediately – a big one, obviously expensive. he studied it intently fora minute and then handed back the glasses without a word.
‘do you know the car, bill?’ asked jack, curiously, seeing bill’s expression.
‘no,’ said bill. ‘i don’t. but – it just makes me think a bit, that’s all. sorry i can’t tell you anymore. i’ll wander up to the farmhouse tonight and ask a few questions – then i’ll know a bitmore!’
