笔下文学
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Chapter 14

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我醒来时,房间里阳光明亮。我以为又回到了前线,所以在床上把身子伸了伸。想不到双腿疼痛,低头一看,看到双腿还包扎着肮脏的绷带,才明白身在何地。我伸手抓住电线按电铃。我听见走廊上的电铃响声,随后有个穿着橡皮底鞋子的人在走近来。来的是盖琪小姐,在明亮的阳光下,她看起来人苍老一点,而且不怎么好看。

“早上好,”她说。“你夜里睡得好吗?”

“好。多谢你,”我说。“我可以叫个理发师来吗?”

“方才我来看你,你正抱着这东西熟睡在床上。”

她打开橱门,举起那瓶味美思。差不多喝光了。“你床底下的那一瓶我也放在橱里了,”她说。“你为什么不跟我要个杯子呢?”

“我就怕你不让我喝。”

“我本可以陪你喝一点的。”

“你是个好姑娘。”

“单独一人喝酒不好,”她说。“你以后别这么做。”

“好的。”

“你的朋友巴克莱小姐来了,”她说。

“真的?”

“是真的。我不喜欢她。”

“你会喜欢她的。她人非常好。”

她摇摇头。“她当然是好的。你往这一边挪一挪行不行?好了。我给你洗一洗,预备吃早点。”她拿了块布和肥皂,用温水给我洗。“你把肩膀抬起来,”她说。“这样行啦。”

“早饭前打发理发师来行不行?”

“我给你找门房叫他去。”她走了出去又走回来。“他去叫了,”她说,一面把手里的那块布浸在水盆里。

理发师跟着门房进来了。他年纪约莫五十,留着向上翘的小胡子。盖琪小姐给我洗好了,走了出去。理发师过来在我脸上涂上皂沫,给我刮胡子。他人很严肃,一声不响。

“怎么啦?有什么消息没有?”我问。

“什么消息?”

“随便什么消息。城里有什么事?”

“这是战争时期,”他说。“到处有敌人的耳目。”

我抬头看看他。“请你的脸别动,”他说,一边继续刮胡子。“我什么都不说。”

“你究竟怎么啦?”我问。

“我是意大利人。我不和敌人通信息。”

我只好由他去了。倘若他是疯子,我的脸还是早一点离开他的剃刀好。

有一次,我想好好地看他一下。“当心,”他说。“剃刀快得很。”修脸后我付钱给他,给了他半个里拉做小帐。他退回了小帐。

“我不收。我没有上前线。但是我还是意大利人。”

“滚你妈的蛋。”

“那我就告退了,”他说,用报纸包好剃刀。他走了出去,把半个里拉留在床头的桌子上。我按按铃。盖琪小姐走进来。“劳驾把门房喊来。”“好的。”

门房来了。他竭力忍住了笑。

“那理发师是不是疯子?”

“不是,长官。他搞错了。他听不大懂,以为我说你是个奥国军官。”

“噢,”我说。

“嗬,嗬,嗬,”门房直笑。“他这个人真有趣。他说只要你动一动,他就——”他伸着食指划一划喉咙。

“嗬,嗬,嗬,”他竭力忍住笑。“后来我对他说,你并不是奥地利人。嗬,嗬,嗬。”

“嗬,嗬,嗬,”我埋怨道。“倘若他把我喉咙割断的话,那就更有趣了。嗬,嗬,嗬!”

“那倒不会,长官。他非常害怕奥地利人。嗬,嗬,嗬。”

“嗬,嗬,嗬,”我说。“滚你的。”

他走出去,我听见他在走廊上的笑声。我听见有人在走廊上走近来。我望着门。来的是凯瑟琳·巴克莱。她走进房,走到床边。

“你好,亲爱的,”她说。她看上去又清新又年轻,十分美丽。我以为从来没见过这样美丽的人。

“你好,”我说。我一看到她,就爱上了她。心里神魂颠倒。她望望门口,看是没有人,就在床沿上坐下,弯下身来吻我。我把她拉下,吻她,感到她的心在怦怦地跳。

“你这亲爱的,”我说。“你能够到这里来岂不是太奇妙吗?”“其实要来也不太困难。不过要呆下去,可能不容易。”

“你非呆下去不可,”我说。“噢,你真奇妙。”我爱她爱得疯了。我简直不相信她真的就在跟前,紧紧地抱住她。

“别这样,”她说。“你身体还没有复原哩。”

“哪里,我行了。来吧。”

“不。你还没十分好。”

“哪里。我行。我行的。求求你。”

“你真的爱我吗?”

“我真的爱你。我为你发疯了。请你快来吧。”

“我们的心在跳哩。”

“心我不管。我要的是你。我只是爱你爱得发疯了。”

“你果真爱我吗?”

“别老是说这个。来吧。求求你。求求你,凯瑟琳。”

“好,不过只能来一会儿。”

“好,”我说。“把门关好。”

“你不能这样。你不该。”

“来吧。别说话。请你来吧。”

凯瑟琳坐在床边的椅子上。门开着,外面就是走廊。疯狂劲儿过去了,我觉得空前愉快。

她问道:“你现在可相信我爱你吗?”

“噢,你真可爱,”我说。“你非呆下去不可。他们不能打发你走。我爱你爱得发疯了。”

“我们得十分小心。刚才那真是发疯。我们不该这么做。”“夜里来还是行的。”

“我得十分小心。你在旁人面前要留个神。”

“我会留神的。”

“你得小心。你讨人喜欢。你真的爱我,可不是吗?”

“别再说这个了。你不知道那对我的影响是多么厉害。”“那么我以后小心就是了。我不想对你再干什么了。我现在得走了,亲爱的,真的。”

“就要回来啊。”

“能够来时我就来。”

“再会。”

“再会,亲爱的。”

她走了出去。天知道我本来不想爱她。我本来不想爱什么人。但是天知道我现在可爱上她了,当我躺在米兰一家医院的房间里的床上时,百感交集,涌进了我的脑海,不过我感到非常愉快幸福。最后盖琪小姐来了。“医生快来啦,”她说。“他从科莫湖打来了电话。”

“他什么时候到?”

“今天下午。”

it was bright sunlight in the room when i woke. i thought i was back at the front and stretched out in bed. my legs hurt me and i looked down at them still in the dirty bandages, and seeing them knew where i was. i reached up for the bell-cord and pushed the button. i heard it buzz down the hall and then some one coming on rubber soles along the hall. it was miss gage and she looked a little older in the bright sunlight and not so pretty.

"good-morning," she said. "did you have a good night?"

"yes. thanks very much," i said. "can i have a barber?"

"i came in to see you and you were asleep with this in the bed with you."

she opened the armoire door and held up the vermouth bottle. it was nearly empty. "i put the other bottle from under the bed in there too," she said. "why didn't you ask me for a glass?"

"i thought maybe you wouldn't let me have it."

"i'd have had some with you."

"you're a fine girl."

"it isn't good for you to drink alone," she said. "you mustn't do it."

"all right."

"your friend miss barkley's come," she said.

"really?"

"yes. i don't like her."

"you will like her. she's awfully nice."

she shook her head. "i'm sure she's fine. can you move just a little to this side? that's fine. i'll clean you up for breakfast." she washed me with a cloth and soap and warm water. "hold your shoulder up," she said. "that's fine."

"can i have the barber before breakfast?"

"i'll send the porter for him." she went out and came back. "he's gone for him," she said and dipped the cloth she held in the basin of water.

the barber came with the porter. he was a man of about fifty with an upturned mustache. miss gage was finished with me and went out and the barber lathered my face and shaved. he was very solemn and refrained from talking.

"what's the matter? don't you know any news?" i asked.

"what news?"

"any news. what's happened in the town?"

"it is time of wai" he said. "the enemy's ears are everywhere."

i looked up at him. "please hold your face still," he said and went on shaving. "i will tell nothing."

"what's the matter with you?" i asked.

"i am an italian. i will not communicate with the enemy."

i let it go at that. if he was crazy, the sooner i could get out from under the razor the better. once i tried to get a good look at him. "beware," he said. "the razor is sharp."

i paid him when it was over and tipped him half a lira. he returned the coins.

"i will not. i am not at the front. but i am an italian."

"get the hell out of here."

"with your permission," he said and wrapped his razors in newspaper. he went out leaving the five copper coins on the table beside the bed. i rang the bell. miss gage came in. "would you ask the porter to come please?"

"all right."

the porter came in. he was trying to keep from laughing.

"is that barber crazy?"

"no, signorino. he made a mistake. he doesn't understand very well and he thought i said you were an austrian officer."

"oh," i said.

"ho ho ho," the porter laughed. "he was funny. one move from you he said and he would have--" he drew his forefinger across his throat.

"ho ho ho," he tried to keep from laughing. "when i tell him you were not an austrian. ho ho ho."

"hoho ho," i said bitterly. "how funny if he would cut my throat. ho ho ho."

"no, signorino. no, no. he was so frightened of an austrian. ho ho ho."

"ho ho ho," i said. "get out of here."

he went out and i heard him laughing in the hall. i heard some one coming down the hallway. i looked toward the door. it was catherine barkley.

she came in the room and over to the bed.

"hello, darling," she said. she looked fresh and young and very beautiful. i thought i had never seen any one so beautiful.

"hello," i said. when i saw her i was in love with her. everything turned over inside of me. she looked toward the door, saw there was no one, then she sat on the side of the bed and leaned over and kissed me. i pulled her down and kissed her and felt her heart beating.

"you sweet," i said. "weren't you wonderful to come here?"

"it wasn't very hard. it may be hard to stay."

"you've got to stay," i said. "oh, you're wonderful." i was crazy about her. i could not believe she was really there and held her tight to me.

"you mustn't," she said. "you're not well enough."

"yes, i am. come on."

"no. you're not strong enough."

"yes. i am. yes. please."

"you do love me?"

"i really love you. i'm crazy about you. come on please."

"feel our hearts beating."

"i don't care about our hearts. i want you. i'm just mad about you."

"you really love me?"

"don't keep on saying that. come on. please. please, catherine."

"all right but only for a minute."

"all right," i said. "shut the door."

"you can't. you shouldn't."

"come on. don't talk. please come on."

catherine sat in a chair by the bed. the door was open into the hall. the wildness was gone and i felt finer than i had ever felt.

she asked, "now do you believe i love you?"

"oh, you're lovely," i said. "you've got to stay. they can't send you away. i'm crazy in love with you."

"we'll have to be awfully careful. that was just madness. we can't do that."

"we can at night."

"we'll have to be awfully careful. you'll have to be careful in front of other people."

"i will."

"you'll have to be. you're sweet. you do love me, don't you?"

"don't say that again. you don't know what that does to me."

"i'll be careful then. i don't want to do anything more to you. i have to go now, darling, really."

"come back right away."

"i'll come when i can."

"good-by."

"good-by, sweet."

she went out. god knows i had not wanted to fall in love with her. i had not wanted to fall in love with any one. but god knows i had and i lay on the bed in the room of the hospital in milan and all sorts of things went through my head but i felt wonderful and finally miss gage came in.

"the doctor's coming," she said. "he telephoned from lake como."

"when does he get here?"

"he'll be here this afternoon."

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