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CHAPTER V. "THERE'S NOTHING HALF SO SWEET IN LIFE."

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four days had slipped away since churchill's first arrival at bissett grange, and he had begun to acknowledge to himself that they had passed more pleasantly than any previous time in his recollection. the mere fact of getting out of business was a great relief to him; he revelled in the knowledge that he had nothing to do; and, in odd times and seasons,--as he lay in bed of nights, for instance,--he would chuckle at the thought that the coming morrow had for him no work and no responsibilities in store; and when he went up to dress himself for dinner, he would settle down into an easy-chair, or hang out of the open window, and delight in the prospect of a good dinner and delightful society, of music and conversation, from which no horrid clock-striking would tear him away, and send him forth to dreary rooms and brain-racking until the small hours of the morning. society, music, and conversation! it is true that he enjoyed them all; and yet, when he came to analyse his happiness, he was fain to admit that they all meant barbara lexden. as in a glass darkly, that tall majestic figure moved through every thought, and sinuously wound itself round every impulse of his heart. at first he laughed at his own weakness, and tried to exorcise the spirit, to whose spells he found himself succumbing, by rough usage and hard exercise. there is probably nothing more serviceable in getting rid of a sharp attack of what is commonly known as "spooniness"--when it is accidental, be it remembered, not innate--than the eager pursuit of some healthy sport. men try wine and cards; both of which are instantaneous but fleeting remedies, and which leave them in a state of reaction, when they are doubly vulnerable; but shooting or hunting, properly pursued, are thoroughly engrossing while they last, and when they are over necessitate an immediate recourse to slumber from the fatigue which they have induced. in the morning, even should opportunity offer, the "spoony" stage is at its lowest ebb; it is rarely possible to work oneself up to the proper pitch of silliness immediately after breakfast, and then some farther sporting expedition is started, which takes one out of harm's way. but in churchill's case even this remedy failed; he was not much of a sportsman; not that he shot badly, but that he was perpetually distrait, and when reminded of his delinquencies by a sharp, "your bird, sir!" from one of his companions, would fire so quickly, and with so much effect, as to mollify the speaker, and lead him to believe that it was shortsightedness, and not being a "cockney"--that worst of imputations amongst sportsmen--that led the stranger to miss marking the rise of the covey. and yet churchill displayed no lack of keen vision in making out the exact whereabouts of a striped petticoat and a pair of high-heeled balmoral boots which crossed a stile a little in advance of the servants bringing the luncheon; but these once seen, and their wearer once talked to, sport was over with him for the day, and he strolled back with miss lexden, at a convenient distance behind miss townshend and captain lyster, who led the way.

"you are soon tired of your sport, mr. churchill," said barbara; "i should have thought that you would have followed ardently any pursuit on which you entered."

"you do me a great deal too much honour, miss lexden," replied churchill, laughing; "my pursuits are of a very desultory nature, and in all of them i observe talleyrand's caution,--point de zèle."

"and you carry that out in every thing?"

"in most things. mine is a very easy-going, uneventful, unexcitable life; i live thoroughly quietly; da capo--all over again; and it is seldom that any thing breaks in upon the routine of my humdrum existence."

"then," said barbara, looking saucily up at him from under her hat--"then you do not follow the advice which your favourite talleyrand gave to the ambassadors whom he was despatching, tenez bonne table, et soignez les femmes."

churchill looked up, and for an instant caught her glance; then he laughed lightly, and said,

"well, not exactly; though the dinners at the club, even the modest joint and the table-beer, are not by any means to be despised; and as for the rest of it, not being a diplomatist, miss lexden, i have no occasion to play the agreeable to any one save in my own house, and, being a bachelor, the only woman i have to see to as properly soignée is my old mother, and i do like her to have the best of every thing."

"your mother lives with you?"

"yes, and will, so far as i can see, until the end of the chapter."

"she--you must be very fond of her!" said barbara, as by a sudden impulse, looking up at his kindling eyes and earnest face.

"i am very proud of her," he replied; "she is more like my sister than my mother; enters into all my hopes and fears, shares all my aspirations, and consoles me in all my doubts."

"more like your wife, then," said barbara, with a slight sneer. "you have in her a rare combination of virtues."

"no," said churchill; "not rare, i am disposed to think. i don't suppose that, in your class,--where maternity means nothing in particular to sons, and merely chaperonage, or the part of buffer, to ward off paternal anger for bills incurred, to daughters,--such characters flourish; but in mine they are common enough."--("a little touch of old harding's radicalism in that speech, by jove!" thought he to himself.)

"i don't exactly fallow your reference to my class as distinct from your own. i suppose we mix amongst pretty much the same people, though as individuals we have not met before. but," added barbara, with a smile, "now that that great occurrence has taken place, i don't think we need enter into lengthy disquisitions as to the charms and duties of maternity; indeed, we will not, for i shall ask you to observe the only conditions which i require from my friends."

"and they are--?" asked churchill.

"qu'on exécute mes orders, as louis napoleon said when asked what should be done on the second of december. so long as my commands are obeyed, i am amiability itself."

"and suppose they were disobeyed?" asked churchill again.

"then--but i won't tell you what would happen! i don't think you'll ever have the chance of knowing; do you think you shall? not that i like amiable people generally--do you? your blue-eyed girls, with colourless hair like blotting-paper, and--but i forgot i was talking to an author. i suppose you're making fun of all i say?"

"on the contrary," said churchill, struggling to keep his gravity, and producing a small memorandum-book, "i purpose making a note of that description for use on a future occasion. there is a spiteful simplicity in that phrase about 'blotting-paper hair' which is really worth embalming in a leader."

"now i know you're laughing, and i hate to be laughed at--"

"by no means; i subscribe the roll. i am now one of the ames damnées, sworn to obey the spell of the sorceress; and the spell is--?"

"nothing. never mind. you will know easily enough when it is once uttered. now they're coming back to us, and i've lost my glove. have you seen it? how very absurd!"

as she spoke, they came up with lyster and miss townshend, who were waiting for them at a gate leading into the grange lands.

"how slowly you walk, miss lexden!" said lyster; "miss townshend thought you never would come up with us."

miss townshend, with much curl-tossing and laughter, declared she had never said any thing of the kind.

"quite otherwise," replied barbara; "from the earnest manner in which you were carrying on the conversation, there could be no doubt that it was you who were going ahead."

"i?--i give you my word i was merely talking of scenery, and telling miss townshend how much i should like to show her rome."

"and promising, when there, to enter into the spirit of the proverb, and do as the romans--eh, captain lyster?"

"oh, ah,--yes! i see what you mean. that's not so bad, eh, mr. churchill? you might use that in some of your thingummies, eh? though i don't know that there's much difference between rome and any other place, after all. it's rather like london, i think."

"is it?" said churchill. "i confess my short sojourn there gave me a very different idea."

"well, i don't know; it's mouldier and more tumbledown, certainly, but there are some parts of it that are uncommonly like the unfinished streets in the new part of belgravia. and people walk about, and eat and drink, and flirt, you know, just as they do in town. there's a colosseum at rome, too, as well as in london, only the one in rome isn't in such good repair."

this was said in perfect good faith; and the others shouted with laughter at it, in the midst of which they came to a stile, joining upon the paddock, and here they parted into couples again, only this time churchill and barbara took the lead.

"i think she's made another coup," said lyster, looking at them, as they immediately fell into earnest conversation. "she certainly is wonderful,--never misses fire!"

"if i were barbara, i should be careful about any flirtation with mr. churchill. they're dreadful people, these poets, you know,--at least so i've always heard; and if you give them any encouragement, and then won't marry them, they cry out, and abuse you terribly in books and newspapers."

"that would be awful!" said lyster; "as bad as having your letters read out in a breach-of-promise case, by jove! never could understand how fellows wrote such spoony letters to women,--never could fancy how they thought of all the things they said."

and yet i think, if captain lyster had been rigorously cross-examined, he must needs have confessed that he himself had never, throughout the whole course of his previous life, gone through so much actual thinking as since he knew miss townshend. there was, perhaps, no species of flirtation in which he was not an adept, for he had sufficient brains to do what he called the "talkee-talkee;" while his natural idleness enabled him to carry on a silent solitude à deux, and to make great play with an occasional elevation of the eyebrow or touch of the hand. he had run through a thorough course of garrison hacks, and had seen all the best produce of the export indian market; he had met the beauties of the season at london balls and in country houses, and his listlessness and languor had hitherto carried him through scot-free. but now he was certainly "fetched," as his friends would call it, and began to feel an interest in miss townshend which he had never felt for any other person. there had been a two days' flirtation between him and barbara lexden; but they were so utterly unsuited, that, at the end of that time, they, as it were, showed their hands to each other, and then, with a laugh, threw up their cards. the flirtation was never renewed; but a curious, strange friendship,--exhibited in the conversation about the coming professor,--and always half raillery on both sides, existed between them. but "this little townshend girl," as he thought of her in his dreamy reveries, was quite another matter; she was so jolly and good-tempered, and so approachable, and never gave herself any airs, and never wanted talking to or that sort of thing, but could amuse herself always, as chirpy as a bird, by jove! and these attributes had an immense amount of weight with taciturn fred lyster, who, moreover, had recently discovered a bald spot about the size of a sixpence at the top of his back-parting, and who immediately perceived imminent age, determined on marriage, and even thought of making his will. and little miss townshend walks by his side, and prattles away, and laughs, saucily tossing her curls in the air, and is as merry as possible; save when, stealing an occasional glance from under her hat, she detects her companion's eyes very earnestly fixed upon her, and then a serious expression will settle on her face for an instant, and something like a sigh escape her.

we are a strange race! here are two couples engaged in the same pursuit, and yet how different is the process! while lyster is strolling idly by miss townshend's side, and listening to her little nonsense, churchill and barbara are stepping ahead, thoroughly engrossed in their conversation. he is talking now, telling her of a german adventure of his; how, with some other students, he made the descent of the rhine on one of the timber-rafts; how they came to grief just below the l?rely, and were all nearly drowned. he tells this with great animation and with many gestures, acting out his story, as is his wont; and throughout all he has a sensation of pleasure as he catches glimpses of her upturned earnest face, lighting up at the special bits of the narrative, always eager and attentive. his earnestness seems infectious. she has dropped all her society drawl, all her society tricks and byplay, and shows more of the real woman than she has for many a day. they talk of germany and its literature, of goethe and schiller and heine; and he tells her some of those stories of hoffmann which are such special favourites with bürschen. thus they pass on to our home poets; and here barbara is the talker, churchill listening and occasionally commenting. barbara has read much, and talks well. it is an utter mistake to suppose that women nowadays have what we have been accustomed, as a term of reproach, to call "miss-ish" taste in books or art. five minutes' survey of that room which barbara called her own in her aunt's house in gloucester place would have served to dispel any such idea. on the walls were proofs of leonardo's "last supper" and landseers "shoeing the horse;" a print of delaroche's "execution of lady jane grey;" a large framed photograph of gerome's "death of c?sar;" an old-fashioned pencil-sketch of barbara's father, taken in the old days by d'orsay long before he ever thought of turning that pencil to actual use; and a coloured photograph--a recent acquisition--of a girl sitting over a wood-fire in a dreamy attitude, burning her love-letters, called "l' auto da fé." on the bookshelves you would have found milton, thomas à-kempis, david copperfield, the christmas carol, a much-used tennyson, keats, george herbert's poems, quarles' emblems, the christian year, carlyle's french revolution, dante, schiller, faust, tupper (of course! "and it is merely envy that makes you laugh at him," she always said), the newcomes, and a quarto shakespeare. no french novels, i am glad to say; but a fat little béranger, and a yellow-covered alfred de musset are on the mantelpiece, while a brass-cross-bearing red-edged prayer-book lies on the table by the bed. barbara's books were not show-books; they all bore more or less the signs of use; but she had read them in a desultory manner, and had never thoroughly appreciated the pleasure to be derived from them. she had never lived in a reading set; for when old miss lexden had mastered the police intelligence and the fashionable news from the post, her intellectual exercises were at an end for the day; and her friends were very much of the same calibre. so now for the first time barbara heard literature talked of by one who had hitherto made it his worship, and who spoke of it with mingled love and reverence--spoke without lecturing, leading his companion into her fair share of the talk, mingling apt quotation with caustic comment or enthusiastic eulogy, until they found themselves, to barbara's surprise, at the hall-door.

i am glad that it is my province as historian to discourse to my readers of the thoughts, impulses, and motives influencing the characters in this story, else it would be difficult for me to convey so much of their inner life as i wish to be known, and which yet would not crop out in the course of the action. in writing a full-flavoured romance of the sensational order, it is not, perhaps, very difficult to imbue your readers with a proper notion of your characters' character. the gentleman who hires two masked assassins to waylay his brother at the foot of the bridge has evidently no undue veneration for the sixth commandment; while the marchioness who, after having only once seen the young artist in black velvet, gives him the gold key leading to her secret apartments, and makes an assignation with him at midnight, is palpably not the style of person whom you would prefer as governess for your daughters. but in a commonplace story of every-day life, touching upon such ordinary topics as walks and dinners and butchers' meat, marrying and giving in marriage, running into debt, and riding horses in rotten row,--where (at least; so far as my experience serves) you find no such marked outlines of character, you must bring to your aid all that quality of work which in the sister art is known by the title pre-raphaelitic, and show virtue in the cut of a coat and vice in the adjustment of a cravat. moreover, we pen-and-ink workers have, in such cases, an advantage over our brethren of the pencil, inasmuch as we can take our readers by the button-hole, and lead them out of the main current of the story, showing them our heroes and heroines in déshabille, and, through the medium of that window which vulcan wished had been fixed in the human breast--and which really is there, for the novelist's inspection--making them acquainted with the inmost thoughts and feelings of the puppets moving before them.

when barbara went to her room that night and surrendered herself to parker and the hair-brushes, that pattern of ladies'-maids thought that she had never seen her mistress so preoccupied since karl von knitzler, an attaché of the austrian embassy,--who ran for a whole season in the ruck of the lexden's admirers, and at last thought he had strength for the first flight,--had received his coup de grace. in her wonderment parker gave two or three hardish tugs at the hair which she was manipulating, but received no reproof; for the inside of that little head was so busy as to render it almost insensible to the outside friction. barbara was thinking of mr. churchill--as yet she had not even thought of him by his christian name, scarcely perhaps knew it--and of the strange interest which he seemed to have aroused in her. the tones of his voice yet seemed ringing in her ears; she remembered his warm, earnest manner when speaking from himself, and the light way in which he fell into her tone of jesting badinage. then, with something like a jar, she recollected his suppressed sneer at the difference in their "class," and her foot tapped angrily on the floor as the recollection rose in her mind. mingled strangely with these were reminiscences of his comely head, white shapely hands, strong figure, and well-made boots; of the way in which he sat and walked; of--and then, with a start which nearly hurled one of the brushes out of parker's hand, she gathered herself together as she felt the whole truth rush upon her, and knew that she was thinking too much of the man and determined that she would so think no more. who was he, living away in some obscure region in london among a set of people whom no one knew, leading a life which would not be tolerated by any of her friends, to engross her thoughts? between them rolled a gulf, wide and impassable, on the brink of which they might indeed stand for a few minutes interchanging casual nothings in the course of life's journey, but which rendered closer contact impossible. and yet--but barbara determined there should be no "and yet;" and with this determination full upon her, she dismissed parker and fell asleep.

and churchill--what of him? alas, regardless of his doom, that little victim played! when old marmaduke gave the signal for retiring, churchill would not, on this night, follow the other men into the smoking-room. the politics, the ribaldry, the scandal, the horsey-doggy talk, would be all more intolerable than ever; he wanted to be alone, to go through that process, so familiar to him on all difficult occasions, of "thinking it out;" so he told gumble to take a bottle of claret to his room, and, arrived there, he lit his old meerschaum, and leant out of the window gazing over the distant moonlit park. but this time the "thinking it out" failed dismally; amid the white smoke-wreaths curling before him rose a tall, slight grateful figure; in his ear yet lingered the sound of a clear low voice; his hand yet retained the thrill which ran through him as she touched it in wishing him "good night." he thought of her as he had never thought of woman before, and he gloried in the thought: he was no love-sick boy, to waste in fond despair, and sicken in his longing; he was a strong, healthy man, with a faultless digestion, an earnest will, a clear conscience, and a heart thinking no guile. there was the difference in the rank, certainly--and in connexion with this reflection a grim smile crossed his face as he remembered harding, and his caution about "swells"--but what of that? did not good education, and a life that would bear scrutiny, lift a man to any rank? and would not she--and then he drew from his pocket a dainty, pearl-gray glove (jouvin's two-buttoned, letter b), and pressed it to his lips. it was silly, ladies and gentlemen, i admit; but then, you know, it never happened to any of us; and though "the court, the camp, the grove" suffer, we have the pleasure of thinking that the senate, the bar, the commerce of england, and the public press, always escape scot-free.

breakfast at bissett grange lasted from nine--at the striking of which hour old sir marmaduke entered the room, and immediately rang the bell for a huge smoking bowl of oatmeal porridge, his invariable matutinal meal--until twelve; by which time the laziest of the guests had generally progressed from yorkshire-pie, through bacon, eggs, and finnan haddies, down to toast and marmalade, and were sufficiently refected. barbara was always one of the last; she was specially late on the morning after the talk just described; and on her arrival in the breakfast-room found only mr. and mrs. vincent, who always lingered fondly over their meals, and who, so long as the cloth remained on the table, sat pecking and nibbling, like a couple of old sparrows, at the dishes within reach of them; captain lyster, who between his sips of coffee was dipping into bell's life; and sir marmaduke himself, who had returned from a brisk walk round the grounds and the stables and the farm, and was deep in the columns of the times. but, to her astonishment, the place at table next hers had evidently not yet been occupied. the solid white breakfast-set was unused, the knives and forks were unsoiled; and yet mr. churchill, who had hitherto occupied that place, had usually finished his meal and departed before barbara arrived. this morning, however, was clearly an exception; he had not yet breakfasted, for by his plate lay three unopened letters addressed to him. barbara noticed this--noticed moreover that the top letter, in a long shiny pink envelope, was addressed in a scrawly, unmistakably female hand, and had been redirected in a larger, bolder writing. as she seated herself, with her eyes, it must be confessed, on this dainty missive, the door opened, and churchill entered. after a general salutation, he was beginning a half-laughing apology for his lateness as he sat down, when his eye lit on the pink envelope. he changed colour slightly; then, before commencing his breakfast, took up his letters and placed them in the breast-pocket of his shooting-coat.

"this is horrible, miss lexden," he said, "bringing these dreadful hours into the country; here--where you should enjoy the breezy call of incense-breathing morn, the cock's shrill clarion, and all the rest of it--to come down to your breakfast just when the bucolic mind is pondering on the immediate advent of its dinner."

"be good enough to include yourself in this sweeping censure, mr. churchill," said barbara. "i was down before you; but i accepted my position, nor, however late i might have been, should i have attempted--"

"i congratulate you, sir," interrupted mr. vincent, dallying with a lump of marmalade on a wedge of toast,--"i congratulate you, mr. churchill, on a prudence which but few men of your age possess."

"you are very good, but i scarcely follow you."

"i saw you--i saw you put away your letters until after breakfast. a great stroke that! men generally are so eager to get at their letters, that they plunge into them at once, before meals little thinking that the contents may have horrible influence on their digestion."

"i am sorry to say that i was influenced by no such sanitary precautions. my correspondence will keep; and i have yet to learn that to read letters in the presence of ladies is--"

"pray, make no apologies, as far as i am concerned," said barbara, with a curl of her lip and an expansion of nostril; "if you have any wish to read your doubtless important correspondence--"

"i have no such wish, miss lexden. litera scripta manet; which, being interpreted, means, my letters will keep. and now, mr. vincent, i'll trouble you for a skilful help of that game-pie."

churchill remained firm; he was still at breakfast, and his letters remained unopened in his pocket, when barbara left the room to prepare for a drive with miss townshend. as they re?ntered the avenue after a two hours' turn round the downs, they met captain lyster in a dog-cart.

"i have been over to brighton," he explained; "drove churchill to the station. he got some news this morning, and is obliged to run up to town for a day or two. but he's coming back, miss lexden."

"is he, indeed!" said barbara. "what splendid intelligence! i should think, captain lyster, that, since the announcement of the fall of sebastopol, england has scarcely heard such glorious news as that mr. churchill is coming back to bissett." and, with a clear, ringing laugh, she pulled the ponies short up at the hall-door, jumped from the carriage, and passed to her room.

"she don't like his going, all the same,--give you my word," said lyster, simply, to miss townshend.

and she did not. she coupled his sudden departure with the receipt of that pink envelope and the address in the feminine scrawl. who was the writer of that letter? what could the business be to take him away so hastily? with her head leaning on her hand, she sits before her dressing-table pondering these things. it certainly was a woman's writing. is this quiet, sedate, self-possessed man a flirt? does he carry on a correspondence with-- and if he does, what is it to her? she is nothing to him--and yet--who can it be? it was a woman's hand! she wonders where he is at that moment; she would like to see him just for an instant.

if she could have had her wish, she would have seen him by himself in a railway-carriage, an unheeded times lying across his knee, and in his hand a little pearl-gray kid-glove.

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