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VIII. LIGHTER FANCIES

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when my uncles changed their minds in regard to colonizing their families at the mills, as they did in about a year, it became necessary for my father to look about for some new employment, and he naturally looked in the old direction. there were several schemes for getting hold of this paper and that, and there were offers that came to nothing. in that day there were few salaried editors in the country outside of new york, and the only hope we could have was of some place as printers in an office which we might finally buy. the affair ended in our going to the state capital, where my father found work as a reporter of legislative proceedings for one of the daily journals, and i was taken into the office as a compositor. in this way i came into living contact with literature again, and the daydreams began once more over the familiar cases of type. a definite literary ambition grew up in me, and in the long reveries of the afternoon, when i was distributing my case, i fashioned a future of overpowering magnificence and undying celebrity. i should be ashamed to say what literary triumphs i achieved in those preposterous deliriums. what i actually did was to write a good many copies of verse, in imitation, never owned, of moore and goldsmith, and some minor poets, whose work caught my fancy, as i read it in the newspapers or put it into type.

one of my pieces, which fell so far short of my visionary performances as to treat of the lowly and familiar theme of spring, was the first thing i ever had in print. my father offered it to the editor of the paper i worked on, and i first knew, with mingled shame and pride, of what he had done when i saw it in the journal. in the tumult of my emotions i promised myself that if i got through this experience safely i would never suffer anything else of mine to be published; but it was not long before i offered the editor a poem myself. i am now glad to think it dealt with so humble a fact as a farmer's family leaving their old home for the west. the only fame of my poem which reached me was when another boy in the office quoted some lines of it in derision. this covered me with such confusion that i wonder that i did not vanish from the earth. at the same time i had my secret joy in it, and even yet i think it was attempted in a way which was not false or wrong. i had tried to sketch an aspect of life that i had seen and known, and that was very well indeed, and i had wrought patiently and carefully in the art of the poor little affair.

my elder brother, for whom there was no place in the office where i worked, had found one in a store, and he beguiled the leisure that light trade left on his hands by reading the novels of captain marryat. i read them after him with a great deal of amusement, but without the passion that i bestowed upon my favorite authors. i believe i had no critical reserves in regard to them, but simply they did not take my fancy. still, we had great fun with japhet in 'search of a father', and with 'midshipman easy', and we felt a fine physical shiver in the darkling moods of 'snarle-yow the dog-fiend.' i do not remember even the names of the other novels, except 'jacob faithful,' which i chanced upon a few years ago and found very, hard reading.

we children who were used to the free range of woods and fields were homesick for the country in our narrow city yard, and i associate with this longing the 'farmer's boy of bloomfield,' which my father got for me. it was a little book in blue cloth, and there were some mild woodcuts in it. i read it with a tempered pleasure, and with a vague resentment of its trespass upon thomson's ground in the division of its parts under the names of the seasons. i do not know why i need have felt this. i was not yet very fond of thomson. i really liked bloomfield better; for one thing, his poem was written in the heroic decasyllabics which i preferred to any other verse.

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