it was for this blessed and wonderful learning, he said to himself, that he had been beaten, that his body had been scored with red and purple stripes. he remembered his father’s oft-repeated exclamation, “cythrawl sais!” he understood that the phrase damned not englishmen qua englishmen, but anglo–saxonism — the power of the creed that builds manchester, that “does business,” that invents popular dissent, representative government, adulteration, suburbs, and the public school system. it was, according to his father, the creed of “the prince of this world,” the creed that made for comfort, success, a good balance at the bank, the praise of men, the sensible and tangible victory and achievement; and he bade his little boy, who heard everything and understood next to nothing, fly from it, hate it and fight against it as he would fight against the devil —“and,” he would add, “it is the only devil you are ever likely to come across.”

and the little ambrose had understood not much of all this, and if he had been asked — even at fifteen — what it all meant, he would probably have said that it was a great issue between norman mouldings and mr. horbury, an armageddon of selden abbey versus rocker. indeed, it is doubtful whether old nicholas meyrick would have been very much clearer, for he forgot everything that might be said on the other side. he forgot that anglo–saxonism (save in the united states of america) makes generally for equal laws; that civil riot (“labour” movements, of course, excepted) is more a celtic than a saxon vice; that the penalty of burning alive is unknown amongst anglo–saxons, unless the provocation be extreme; that englishmen have substituted “indentured labour” for the old-world horrors of slavery; that english justice smites the guilty rich equally with the guilty poor; that men are no longer poisoned with swift and secret drugs, though somewhat unwholesome food may still be sold very occasionally. indeed, the old meyrick once told his rector that he considered a brothel a house of sanctity compared with a modern factory, and he was beginning to relate some interesting tales concerning the three gracious courtesans of the isle of britain when the rector fled in horror — he came from sydenham. and all this was a nice preparation for lupton.

a wonderful joy, an ecstasy of bliss, swelled in ambrose’s heart as he assured himself that he was a witness, though a mean one, for the old faith, for the faith of secret and beautiful and hidden mysteries as opposed to the faith of rocker and sticker and mucker, and “the thought of the school as an inspiring motive in life”— the text on which the head had preached the sunday before. he bared his arms and kissed the purple swollen flesh and prayed that it might ever be so, that in body and mind and spirit he might ever be beaten and reviled and made ridiculous for the sacred things, that he might ever be on the side of the despised and the unsuccessful, that his life might ever be in the shadow — in the shadow of the mysteries.

he thought of the place in which he was, of the hideous school, the hideous town, the weary waves of the dun midland scenery bounded by the dim, hopeless horizon; and his soul revisited the faery hills and woods and valleys of the west. he remembered how, long ago, his father had roused him early from sleep in the hush and wonder of a summer morning. the whole world was still and windless; all the magic odours of the night rose from the earth, and as they crossed the lawn the silence was broken by the enchanted song of a bird rising from a thorn tree by the gate. a high white vapour veiled the sky, and they only knew that the sun had risen by the brightening of this veil, by the silvering of the woods and the meadows and the water in the rejoicing brook. they crossed the road, and crossed the brook in the field beneath, by the old foot-bridge tremulous with age, and began to climb the steep hillside that one could see from the windows, and, the ridge of the hill once surmounted, the little boy found himself in an unknown land: he looked into deep, silent valleys, watered by trickling streams; he saw still woods in that dreamlike morning air; he saw winding paths that climbed into yet remoter regions. his father led him onward till they came to a lonely height — they had walked scarcely two miles, but to ambrose it seemed a journey into another world — and showed him certain irregular markings in the turf.

and nicholas meyrick murmured:

“the cell of iltyd is by the seashore,

the ninth wave washes its altar,

there is a fair shrine in the land of morgan.

“the cell of dewi is in the city of the legions,

nine altars owe obedience to it,

sovereign is the choir that sings about it.

“the cell of cybi is the treasure of gwent,

nine hills are its perpetual guardians,

nine songs befit the memory of the saint.”

“see,” he said, “there are the nine hills.” he pointed them out to the boy, telling him the tale of the saint and his holy bell, which they said had sailed across the sea from syon and had entered the severn, and had entered the usk, and had entered the soar, and had entered the canthwr; and so one day the saint, as he walked beside the little brook that almost encompassed the hill in its winding course, saw the bell “that was made of metal that no man might comprehend,” floating under the alders, and crying:

“sant, sant, sant,

i sail from syon

to cybi sant!”

“and so sweet was the sound of that bell,” ambrose’s father went on, “that they said it was as the joy of angels ym mharadwys, and that it must have come not from the earthly, but from the heavenly and glorious syon.”

and there they stood in the white morning, on the uneven ground that marked the place where once the saint rang to the sacrifice, where the quickening words were uttered after the order of the old mass of the britons.

“and then came the yellow hag of pestilence, that destroyed the bodies of the cymri; then the red hag of rome, that caused their souls to stray; last is come the black hag of geneva, that sends body and soul quick to hell. no honour have the saints any more.”

then they turned home again, and all the way ambrose thought he heard the bell as it sailed the great deeps from syon, crying aloud: “sant, sant, sant!” and the sound seemed to echo from the glassy water of the little brook, as it swirled and rippled over the shining stones circling round those lonely hills.

so they made strange pilgrimages over the beloved land, going farther and farther afield as the boy grew older. they visited deep wells in the heart of the woods, where a few broken stones, perhaps, were the last remains of the hermitage. “ffynnon ilar bysgootwr — the well of saint ilar the fisherman,” nicholas meyrick would explain, and then would follow the story of ilar; how no man knew whence he came or who his parents were. he was found, a little child, on a stone in a river in armorica, by king alan, and rescued by him. and ever after they discovered on the stone in the river where the child had lain every day a great and shining fish lying, and on this fish ilar was nourished. and so he came with a great company of the saints to britain, and wandered over all the land.

“so at last ilar sant came to this wood, which people now call st. hilary’s wood because they have forgotten all about ilar. and he was weary with his wandering, and the day was very hot; so he stayed by this well and began to drink. and there on that great stone he saw the shining fish, and so he rested, and built an altar and a church of willow boughs, and offered the sacrifice not only for the quick and the dead, but for all the wild beasts of the woods and the streams.

“and when this blessed ilar rang his holy bell and began to offer, there came not only the prince and his servants, but all the creatures of the wood. there, under the hazel boughs, you might see the hare, which flies so swiftly from men, come gently and fall down, weeping greatly on account of the passion of the son of mary. and, beside the hare, the weasel and the pole-cat would lament grievously in the manner of penitent sinners; and wolves and lambs together adored the saint’s hierurgy; and men have beheld tears streaming from the eyes of venomous serpents when ilar agios uttered ‘curiluson’ with a loud voice — since the serpent is not ignorant that by its wickedness sorrow came to the whole world. and when, in the time of the holy ministry, it is necessary that frequent alleluyas should be chanted and vociferated, the saint wondered what should be done, for as yet none in that place was skilled in the art of song. then was a great miracle, since from all the boughs of the wood, from every bush and from every green tree, there resounded alleluyas in enchanting and prolonged harmony; never did the bishop of rome listen to so sweet a singing in his church as was heard in this wood. for the nightingale and thrush and blackbird and blackcap, and all their companions, are gathered together and sing praises to the lord, chanting distinct notes and yet concluding in a melody of most ravishing sweetness; such was the mass of the fisherman. nor was this all, for one day as the saint prayed beside the well he became aware that a bee circled round and round his head, uttering loud buzzing sounds, but not endeavouring to sting him. to be short; the bee went before ilar, and led him to a hollow tree not far off, and straightway a swarm of bees issued forth, leaving a vast store of wax behind them. this was their oblation to the most high, for from their wax ilar sant made goodly candles to burn at the offering; and from that time the bee is holy, because his wax makes light to shine upon the gifts.”

this was part of the story that ambrose’s father read to him; and they went again to see the holy well. he looked at the few broken and uneven stones that were left to distinguish it from common wells; and there in the deep green wood, in the summer afternoon, under the woven boughs, he seemed to hear the strange sound of the saint’s bell, to see the woodland creatures hurrying through the undergrowth that they might be present at the offering. the weasel beat his little breast for his sins; the big tears fell down the gentle face of the hare; the adders wept in the dust; and all the chorus of the birds sang: “alleluya, alleluya, alleluya!”

once they drove a long way from the wern, going towards the west, till they came to the great mountain, as the people called it. after they had turned from the high road they went down a narrow lane, and this led them with many windings to a lower ridge of the mountain, where the horse and trap were put up at a solitary tavern. then they began to toil upward on foot, crossing many glistening and rejoicing streams that rushed out cold from the limestone rock, mounting up and up, through the wet land where the rare orchis grew amongst the rushes, through hazel brakes, through fields that grew wilder as they still went higher, and the great wind came down from the high dome above them. they turned, and all the shining land was unrolled before them; the white houses were bright in the sunlight, and there, far away, was the yellow sea and the two islands, and the coasts beyond.

nicholas meyrick pointed out a tuft of trees on a hill a long way off and told his son that the wern was hidden beyond it; and then they began to climb once more, till they came at last to the line where the fields and hedges ended, and above there was only the wild mountain land. and on this verge stood an old farmhouse with strong walls, set into the rock, sheltered a little from the winds by a line of twisted beeches. the walls of the house were gleaming white, and by the porch there was a shrub covered with bright yellow flowers. mr. meyrick beat upon the oak door, painted black and studded with heavy nails. an old man, dressed like a farmer, opened it, and ambrose noticed that his father spoke to him with something of reverence in his voice, as if he were some very great person. they sat down in a long room, but dimly lighted by the thick greenish glass in the quarried window, and presently the old farmer set a great jug of beer before them. they both drank heartily enough, and mr. meyrick said:

“aren’t you about the last to brew your own beer, mr. cradock?”

“iss; i be the last of all. they do all like the muck the brewer sends better than cwrw dda.”

“the whole world likes muck better than good drink, now.”

“you be right, sir. old days and old ways of our fathers, they be gone for ever. there was a blasted preacher down at the chapel a week or two ago, saying — so they do tell me — that they would all be damned to hell unless they took to ginger-beer directly. iss indeed now; and i heard that he should say that a man could do a better day’s work on that rot-belly stuff than on good beer. wass you ever hear of such a liarr as that?”

the old man was furious at the thought of these infamies and follies; his esses hissed through his teeth and his r’s rolled out with fierce emphasis. mr. meyrick nodded his approval of this indignation.

“we have what we deserve,” he said. “false preachers, bad drink, the talk of fools all the day long — even on the mountain. what is it like, do you think, in london?”

there fell a silence in the long, dark room. they could hear the sound of the wind in the beech trees, and ambrose saw how the boughs were tossed to and fro, and he thought of what it must be like in winter nights, here, high upon the great mountain, when the storms swept up from the sea, or descended from the wilds of the north; when the shafts of rain were like the onset of an army, and the winds screamed about the walls.

“may we see it?” said mr. meyrick suddenly.

“i did think you had come for that. there be very few now that remember.”

he went out, and returned carrying a bunch of keys. then he opened a door in the room and warned “the young master” to take care of the steps. ambrose, indeed, could scarcely see the way. his father led him down a short flight of uneven stone steps, and they were in a room which seemed at first quite dark, for the only light came from a narrow window high up in the wall, and across the glass there were heavy iron bars.

cradock lit two tall candles of yellow wax that stood in brass candlesticks on a table; and, as the flame grew clear, ambrose saw that he was opening a sort of aumbry constructed in the thickness of the wall. the door was a great slab of solid oak, three or four inches thick — as one could see when it was opened — and from the dark place within the farmer took an iron box and set it carefully upon the floor, mr. meyrick helping him. they were strong men, but they staggered under the weight of the chest; the iron seemed as thick as the door of the cupboard from which it was taken, and the heavy, antique lock yielded, with a grating scream, to the key. inside it there was another box of some reddish metal, which, again, held a case of wood black with age; and from this, with reverent hands, the farmer drew out a veiled and splendid cup and set it on the table between the two candles. it was a bowl-like vessel of the most wonderful workmanship, standing on a short stem. all the hues of the world were mingled on it, all the jewels of the regions seemed to shine from it; and the stem and foot were encrusted with work in enamel, of strange and magical colours that shone and dimmed with alternating radiance, that glowed with red fires and pale glories, with the blue of the far sky, the green of the faery seas, and the argent gleam of the evening star. but before ambrose had gazed more than a moment he heard the old man say, in pure welsh, not in broken english, in a resonant and chanting voice:

“let us fall down and adore the marvellous and venerable work of the lord god almighty.”

to which his father responded:

“agyos, agyos, agyos. mighty and glorious is the lord god almighty, in all his works and wonderful operations. curiluson, curiluson, curiluson.”

they knelt down, cradock in the midst, before the cup, and ambrose and his father on either hand. the holy vessel gleamed before the boy’s eyes, and he saw clearly its wonder and its beauty. all its surface was a marvel of the most delicate intertwining lines in gold and silver, in copper and in bronze, in all manner of metals and alloys; and these interlacing patterns in their brightness, in the strangeness of their imagery and ornament, seemed to enthral his eyes and capture them, as it were, in a maze of enchantment; and not only the eyes; for the very spirit was rapt and garnered into that far bright world whence the holy magic of the cup proceeded. among the precious stones which were set into the wonder was a great crystal, shining with the pure light of the moon; about the rim of it there was the appearance of faint and feathery clouds, but in the centre it was a white splendour; and as ambrose gazed he thought that from the heart of this jewel there streamed continually a shower of glittering stars, dazzling his eyes with their incessant motion and brightness. his body thrilled with a sudden ineffable rapture, his breath came and went in quick pantings; bliss possessed him utterly as the three crowned forms passed in their golden order. then the interwoven sorcery of the vessel became a ringing wood of golden, and bronze, and silver trees; from every side resounded the clear summons of the holy bells and the exultant song of the faery birds; he no longer heard the low-chanting voices of cradock and his father as they replied to one another in the forms of some antique liturgy. then he stood by a wild seashore; it was a dark night, and there was a shrilling wind that sang about the peaks of the sharp rock, answering to the deep voices of the heaving sea. a white moon, of fourteen days old, appeared for a moment in the rift between two vast black clouds, and the shaft of light showed all the savage desolation of the shore — cliffs that rose up into mountains, into crenellated heights that were incredible, whose bases were scourged by the torrents of hissing foam that were driven against them from the hollow-sounding sea. then, on the highest of those awful heights, ambrose became aware of walls and spires, of towers and battlements that must have touched the stars; and, in the midst of this great castle, there surged up the aspiring vault of a vast church, and all its windows were ablaze with a light so white and glorious that it was as if every pane were a diamond. and he heard the voices of a praising host, or the clamour of golden trumpets and the unceasing choir of the angels. and he knew that this place was the sovereign perpetual choir, cor-arbennic, into whose secret the deadly flesh may scarcely enter. but in the vision he lay breathless, on the floor before the gleaming wall of the sanctuary, while the shadows of the hierurgy were enacted; and it seemed to him that, for a moment of time, he saw in unendurable light the mystery of mysteries pass veiled before him, and the image of the slain and risen.

for a brief while this dream was broken. he heard his father singing softly:

“gogoniant y tad ac y mab ac yr yspryd glan.”

and the old man answered:

“agya trias eleeson ymas.”

then again his spirit was lost in the bright depths of the crystal, and he saw the ships of the saints, without oar or sail, afloat on the faery sea, seeking the glassy isle. all the whole company of the blessed saints of the isle of britain sailed on the adventure; dawn and sunset, night and morning, their illuminated faces never wavered; and ambrose thought that at last they saw bright shores in the dying light of a red sun, and there came to their nostrils the scent of the deep apple-garths in avalon, and odours of paradise.

when he finally returned to the presence of earthly things he was standing by his father; while cradock reverently wrapped the cup in the gleaming veils which covered it, saying as he did so, in welsh:

“remain in peace, o holy and divine cup of the lord. henceforth i know not whether i shall return to thee or not; but may the lord vouchsafe me to see thee in the church of the firstborn which is in heaven, on the altar of the sacrifice which is from age unto ages.”

ambrose went up the steps and out into the sunshine on the mountain side with the bewilderment of strange dreams, as a coloured mist, about him. he saw the old white walls, the yellow blossoms by the porch; above, the wild, high mountain wall; and, below, all the dear land of gwent, happy in the summer air, all its woods and fields, its rolling hills and its salt verge, rich in a golden peace. beside him the cold water swelled from the earth and trickled from the grey rock, and high in the air an exultant lark was singing. the mountain breeze was full of life and gladness, and the rustling and tossing of the woods, the glint and glimmer of the leaves beneath, made one think that the trees, with every creature, were merry on that day. and in that dark cell beneath many locks, beneath wood and iron, concealed in golden, glittering veils, lay hidden that glorious and awful cup, glass of wonderful vision, portal and entrance of the spiritual place.

his father explained to him something of that which he had seen. he told him that the vessel was the holy cup of teilo sant, which he was said to have received from the lord in the state of paradise, and that when teilo said mass, using that chalice, the choir of angels was present visibly; that it was a cup of wonders and mysteries, the bestower of visions and heavenly graces.

“but whatever you do,” he said, “do not speak to anyone of what you have seen to-day, because if you do the mystery will be laughed at and blasphemed. do you know that your uncle and aunt at lupton would say that we were all mad together? that is because they are fools, and in these days most people are fools, and malignant fools too, as you will find out for yourself before you are much older. so always remember that you must hide the secrets that you have seen; and if you do not do so you will be sorry.”

mr. meyrick told his son why old cradock was to be treated with respect — indeed, with reverence.

“he is just what he looks,” he said, “an old farmer with a small freehold up here on the mountain side; and, as you heard, his english is no better than that of any other farmer in this country. and, compared with cradock, the duke of norfolk is a man of yesterday. he is of the tribe of teilo the saint; he is the last, in direct descent, of the hereditary keepers of the holy cup; and his race has guarded that blessed relic for thirteen hundred years. remember, again, that to-day, on this mountain, you have seen great marvels which you must keep in silence.”

poor ambrose! he suffered afterwards for his forgetfulness of his father’s injunction. soon after he went to lupton one of the boys was astonishing his friends with a brilliant account of the crown jewels, which he had viewed during the christmas holidays. everybody was deeply impressed, and young meyrick, anxious to be agreeable in his turn, began to tell about the wonderful cup that he had once seen in an old farmhouse. perhaps his manner was not convincing, for the boys shrieked with laughter over his description. a monitor who was passing asked to hear the joke, and, having been told the tale, clouted ambrose over the head for an infernal young liar. this was a good lesson, and it served ambrose in good stead when one of the masters having, somehow or other, heard the story, congratulated him in the most approved scholastic manner before the whole form on his wonderful imaginative gifts.

“i see the budding novelist in you, meyrick,” said this sly master. “besant and rice will be nowhere when you once begin. i suppose you are studying character just at present? let us down gently, won’t you? [to the delighted form.] we must be careful, mustn’t we, how we behave? ‘a chiel’s amang us takin’ notes,’” etc. etc.

but meyrick held his tongue. he did not tell his form master that he was a beast, a fool and a coward, since he had found out that the truth, like many precious things, must often be concealed from the profane. a late vengeance overtook that foolish master. long years after, he was dining at a popular london restaurant, and all through dinner he had delighted the ladies of his party by the artful mixture of brutal insolence and vulgar chaff with which he had treated one of the waiters, a humble-looking little italian. the master was in the highest spirits at the success of his persiflage; his voice rose louder and louder, and his offensiveness became almost supernaturally acute. and then he received a heavy earthen casserole, six quails, a few small onions and a quantity of savoury but boiling juices full in the face. the waiter was a neapolitan.

the hours of the night passed on, as ambrose sat in his bedroom at the old grange, recalling many wonderful memories, dreaming his dreams of the mysteries, of the land of gwent and the land of vision, just as his uncle, but a few yards away in another room of the house, was at the same time rapt into the world of imagination, seeing the new lupton descending like a bride from the heaven of headmasters. but ambrose thought of the great mountain, of the secret valleys, of the sanctuaries and hallows of the saints, of the rich carven work of lonely churches hidden amongst the hills and woods. there came into his mind the fragment of an old poem which he loved:

“in the darkness of old age let not my memory fail,

let me not forget to celebrate the beloved land of gwent.

if they imprison me in a deep place, in a house of pestilence,

still shall i be free, when i remember the sunshine upon mynydd maen.

there have i listened to the singing of the lark, my soul has ascended with the song of the little bird;

the great white clouds were the ships of my spirit, sailing to the haven of the almighty.

equally to be held in honour is the site of the great mountain,

adorned with the gushing of many waters —

sweet is the shade of its hazel thickets,

there a treasure is preserved, which i will not celebrate,

it is glorious, and deeply concealed.

if teilo should return, if happiness were restored to the cymri,

dewi and dyfrig should serve his mass; then a great marvel would be made visible.

o blessed and miraculous work, then should my bliss be as the bliss of angels;

i had rather behold this offering than kiss the twin lips of dark gwenllian.

dear my land of gwent, o quam dilecta tabernacula!

thy rivers are like precious golden streams of paradise,

thy hills are as the mount syon —

better a grave on twyn barlwm than a throne in the palace of the saxons at caer–ludd.”

and then, by the face of contrast, he thought of the first verse of the great school song, “rocker,” one of the earliest of the many poems which his uncle had consecrated to the praise of the dear old school:

“once on a time, in the books that bore me,

i read that in olden days before me

lupton town had a wonderful game,

it was a game with a noble story

(lupton town was then in its glory,

kings and bishops had brought it fame).

it was a game that you all must know,

and ‘rocker’ they called it, long ago.

chorus.

“look out for ‘brooks,’ or you’re sure to drown,

look out for ‘quarries,’ or else you’re down —

that was the way

‘rocker’ to play —

once on a day

that was the way,

once on a day,

that was the way that they used to play in lupton town.”

thinking of the two songs, he put out his light and, wearied, fell into a deep sleep.