for a minute or two i seemed to feel nothing; then there came over me a sort of shiver, partly of cold, for it was very cold, partly of misery. i roused myself, however. with the remembrance of that other evening had come to me also the knowledge of where i was. only a few yards down the sloping street on the left-hand side came a wide stretch of pavement, and there, in a kind of angle, stood a double door, open on both sides, leading into a small outer hall, from which again another door, glazed at the top, was the entrance to cranston's show-rooms.
i remembered it all perfectly. just beyond the inner entrance stood the two carved lions that haddie and i admired so much. i wished i could see them again, and—yes—a flash of joy went through me at the thought—i could get mrs. selwood's address quite as well from old mr. cranston as from the big grocer!
[pg 149]
as soon as the idea struck me i hurried on, seeming to gain fresh strength and energy. it was almost dark, but a gas-lamp was burning dimly above the lintel, and inside, on the glass of the inner door, were the large gilt letters "cranston and co."
i ran up the two or three broad shallow steps and pushed open the door, which was a swing one. it was nearly time for closing, but that i did not know. there was no one to be seen inside, not, at least, in the first room, and the door made no noise. but there stood the dear lions—i could not see them very clearly, for the place was not brightly lighted, but i crept up to them, and stroked softly the one nearest me. they seemed like real friends.
i had not courage to go into the other show-room, and all was so perfectly still that i could scarcely think any one was there. i thought i would wait a few minutes in hopes of some one coming out, of whom i could inquire if i could see mr. cranston. and i was now beginning to feel so tired—so very tired, and so cold.
in here, though i did not see any fire, it felt ever so much warmer than outside. there was no chair or stool, but i found a seat for myself on the stand of the farther-in lion—each of them had a heavy[pg 150] wooden stand. it seemed very comfortable, and i soon found that by moving on a little i could get a nice rest for my head against the lion's body. a strange pleasant sense of protection and comfort came over me.
"how glad i am i came in here," i said to myself. "i don't mind if i have to wait a good while. it is so cosy and warm."
i no longer made any plans. i knew i wanted to ask for mrs. selwood's address, but that was all i thought of. what i should do when i had got it i did not know; where i should go for the night, for it was now quite dark, i did not trouble about in the least. i think i must have been very much in the condition i have heard described, of travellers lost in the snow—the overpowering wish to stay where i was and rest, was all i was conscious of. i did not think of going to sleep. i did not know i was sleepy.
and for some time i knew nothing.
the first thing that caught my attention was a very low murmur—so low that it might have been merely a breath of air playing in the keyhole; i seemed to have been hearing it for some time before it took shape, as it were, and grew into a[pg 151] softly-whispering voice, gradually gathering into words.
"poor little girl; so she has come at last. well, as you say, brother, we have been expecting her for a good while, have we not?"
"yes, indeed, but speak softly. it would be a pity to awake her. and what we have to do can be done just as well while she sleeps."
"i don't agree with you," said the first speaker. "i should much prefer her being awake. she would enjoy the ride, and she is an intelligent child and would profit by our conversation."
"as you like," replied number two. "i must be off to fetch the boy. she will perhaps be awake by the time i return."
and then—just as i was on the point of starting up and telling them i was awake—came a sound of stamping and rustling, and a sort of whirr and a breath of cold air, which told me the swing door had been opened. and when i sat straight up and looked about me, lo and behold, there was only one lion to be seen—the stand of his brother was empty!
"i—please i am awake," i said rather timidly. "it was me you were talking about, wasn't it?"
"i—'it was i'—the verb to be takes the same[pg 152] case after it as before it," was the reply, much to my surprise and rather to my disgust. who would have thought that the carved lions bothered about grammar!
"it was i, then," i repeated meekly. i did not want to give any offence to my new friend. "please—i heard you saying something—something about going a ride. and where has the—the other mr. lion gone? i heard about—a boy."
"you heard correctly," my lion replied, and i knew somehow that he was smiling, or whatever lions do that matches smiling. "my brother has gone to fetch your brother—we planned it all some time ago—we shall meet on the sea-shore and travel together. but we should be starting. can you climb up on to my back?"
"oh yes," i said quite calmly, as if there was nothing the least out of the common in all this, "i'm sure i can."
"catch hold of my mane," said the lion; "don't mind tugging, it won't hurt," and—not to my surprise, for nothing surprised me—i felt my hands full of soft silky hair, as the lion shook down his long wavy mane to help my ascent.
nothing was easier. in another moment i was[pg 153] cosily settled on his back, which felt deliciously comfortable, and the mane seemed to tuck itself round me like a fleecy rug.
"shut your eyes," said my conductor or steed, i don't know which to call him; "go to sleep if you like. i'll wake you when we meet the others."
"thank you," i said, feeling too content and comfortable to disagree with anything he said.
then came a feeling of being raised up, a breath of colder air, which seemed to grow warm again almost immediately, and i knew nothing more till i heard the words, "here they are."
i opened my eyes and looked about me. it was night—overhead in the deep blue sky innumerable stars were sparkling, and down below at our feet i heard the lap-lap of rippling waves. a dark, half-shadowy figure stood at my right hand, and as i saw it more clearly i distinguished the form of the other lion, with—yes, there was some one sitting on his back.
"haddie," i exclaimed.
"yes, yes, geraldine, it's me," my brother's own dear voice replied. "we're going right over the sea—did you know?—isn't it splendid? we're going[pg 154] to see father and mamma. hold out your hand so that you can feel mine."
the brother lions rose into the air.
i did so, and my fingers clasped his, and at that moment the brother lions rose into the air, and down below, even fainter and fainter, came the murmur of the sea, while up above, the twinkling stars looked down on what surely was one of the strangest sights they had ever seen in all their long, long experience!
then again i seemed to know nothing, though somehow, all through, i felt the clasp of haddie's hand and knew we were close together.
a beautiful light streaming down upon us, of which i was conscious even through my closed eyelids, was the next thing i remember. it seemed warm as well as bright, and i felt as if basking in it.
"wake up, geraldine," said haddie's voice.
i opened my eyes. but now i have come to a part of my story which i have never been able, and never shall be able, to put into fitting words. the scene before me was too beautiful, too magically exquisite for me even to succeed in giving the faintest idea of it. still i must try, though knowing that i cannot but fail.
can you picture to yourselves the loveliest day of all the perfect summer days you have ever known—no, more than that, a day like summer and spring in one—the richness of colour, the balmy fragrance of the prime of the year joined to the freshness, the indescribable hopefulness and expectation which is the charm of the spring? the beauty and delight seemed made up of everything lovely mingled together—sights, sounds, scents, feelings. there was the murmur of running streams, the singing of birds, the most delicious scent from the flowers growing in profusion and of every shade of colour.
haddie and i looked at each other—we still held each other by the hand, but now, somehow, we were standing together on the grass, though i could not remember having got down from my perch on the lion's back.
"where are the lions, haddie?" i said.
haddie seemed to understand everything better than i did.
"they're all right," he replied, "resting a little. you see we've come a long way, geraldine, and so quick."
"and where are we?" i asked. "what is this place, haddie? is it fairyland or—or—heaven?"
haddie smiled.
"it's not either," he said. "you'll find out the[pg 155]
[pg 156] name yourself. but come, we must be quick, for we can't stay very long. hold my hand tight and then we can run faster."
i seemed to know that something more beautiful than anything we had seen yet was coming. i did not ask haddie any more questions, even though i had a feeling that he knew more than i did. he seemed quite at home in this wonderful place, quite able to guide me. and his face was shining with happiness.
we ran a good way, and very fast. but i did not feel at all tired or breathless. my feet seemed to have wings, and all the time the garden around us grew lovelier and lovelier. if haddie had not been holding my hand so fast i should scarcely have been able to resist stopping to gather some of the lovely flowers everywhere in such profusion, or to stand still to listen to the dear little birds singing so exquisitely overhead.
"it must be fairyland," i repeated to myself more than once, in spite of what haddie had said.
but suddenly all thought of fairyland or flowers, birds and garden, went out of my head, as haddie stopped in his running.
"geraldine," he half whispered, "look there."
[pg 157]
"there" was a little arbour a few yards from where we stood, and there, seated on a rustic bench, her dear face all sunshine, was mamma!
she started up as soon as she saw us and hastened forward, her arms outstretched.
"my darlings, my darlings," she said, as haddie and i threw ourselves upon her.
she did look so pretty; she was all in white, and she had a rose—one of the lovely roses i had been admiring as we ran—fastened to the front of her dress.
"mamma, mamma," i exclaimed, as i hugged her, "oh, mamma, i am so happy to be with you. is this your garden, mamma, and may we stay with you always now? wasn't it good of the lions to bring us? i have been so unhappy, mamma—somebody said you would get ill far away. but nobody could get ill here. oh, mamma, you will let us stay always."
she did not speak, but looking at haddie i saw a change in his face.
"geraldine," he said, "i told you we couldn't stay long. the lions would be scolded if we did, and you know you must say your french poetry."
and then there came over me the most agonising[pg 158] feeling of disappointment and misery. all the pent-up wretchedness of the last weeks at school woke up and overwhelmed me like waves of dark water. it is as impossible for me to put this into words as it was for me to describe my exquisite happiness, for no words ever succeed in expressing the intense and extraordinary sensations of some dreams. and of course, as you will have found out by this time, the strange adventures i have been relating were those of a dream, though i still, after all the years that have passed since then, remember them so vividly.
it was the fatal words "french poetry" that seemed to awake me—to bring back my terrible unhappiness, exaggerated by the fact of my dreaming.
"french poetry," i gasped, "oh, haddie, how can you remind me of it?"
haddie suddenly turned away, and i saw the face of one of the lions looking over his shoulder, with, strange to say, a white frilled cap surrounding it.
"you must try to drink this, my dear," said the lion, if the lion it was, for as i stared at him the brown face changed into a rather ruddy one—a round good-humoured face, with pleasant eyes and smile, reminding me of mamma's old nurse who had once come to see us.
i stared still more, and sat up a little, for, wonderful to relate, i was no longer in the lovely garden, no longer even in the show-room leaning against the lion: i was in bed in a strange room which i had never seen before. and leaning over me was the owner of the frilled cap, holding a glass in her hand.
"try to drink this, my dearie," she said again, and then i knew it was not the lion but this stranger who had already spoken to me.
i felt very tired, and i sank back again upon the pillow. what did it all mean? where was i? where had i been? i asked myself this in a vague sleepy sort of way, but i was too tired to say it aloud, and before i could make up my mind to try i fell asleep again.
the room seemed lighter the next time i opened my eyes. it was in fact nearly the middle of the day, and a fine day—as clear as it ever was in great mexington. i felt much better and less tired now, almost quite well, except for a slight pain in my throat which told me i must have caught cold, as my colds generally began in my throat.
"i wonder if it was with riding so far in the night," i first said to myself, with a confused remembrance of my wonderful dream. "i didn't feel at[pg 160] all cold on the lion's back, and in the garden it was lovelily warm."
then, as my waking senses quite returned, i started. it had been only a dream—oh dear, oh dear! but still, something had happened—i was certainly not in my little bed in the corner of the room i shared with emma and harriet smith at green bank. when had my dream begun, or was i still dreaming?
i raised myself a little, very softly, for now i began to remember the good-humoured face in the frilled cap, and i thought to myself that unless its owner were a dream too, perhaps she was still in the room, and i wanted to look about me first on my own account.
what there was to see was very pleasant and very real. i felt quite sure i was not dreaming now, wherever i was. it was a large old-fashioned room, with red curtains at the two windows and handsome dark wood furniture. there was a fire burning cheerfully in the grate and the windows looked very clean, even though there was a prospect of chimney-tops to be seen out of the one nearest to me, which told me i was still in a town. and then i began to distinguish sounds outside, though here in this room[pg 161] it was so still. there were lots of wheels passing, some going quickly, some lumbering along with heavy slowness—it was much noisier than at miss ledbury's or at my own old home. here i seemed to be in the very heart of a town. i began to recall the events of the day before more clearly. yes, up to the time i remembered leaning against the carved lion in mr. cranston's show-room all had been real, i felt certain. i recollected with a little shiver the scene in the drawing-room at green bank, and how they had all refused to believe i was speaking the truth when i declared that the french poetry had entirely gone out of my head. and then there was the making up my mind that i could bear school no longer, and the secretly leaving the house, and at last losing my way in the streets.
i had meant to go to mrs. selwood's, or at least to get her address and write to her—but where was i now?—what should i do?
my head grew dizzy again with trying to think, and a faint miserable feeling came over me and i burst into tears.
i did not cry loudly. but there was some one watching in the room who would have heard even a fainter sound than that of my sobs—some one sitting[pg 162] behind my bed-curtains whom i had not seen, who came forward now and leant over me, saying, in words and voice which seemed curiously familiar to me,
"geraldine, my poor little girl."
