i remained no longer in newcastle than until i earned as much money as would pay my way to london. i then took my passage on board a collier bound to the great city; and, after beating about in good weather and bad weather for about three weeks, i arrived in london on the first october, 1776.
the first cockney i met was the scullerman, who was engaged to land me and my luggage near temple bar. i was amused at his slang and his chatter all the way to london bridge; and, on approaching it, he asked me if i was “a-feared;” but, not knowing what i was to be afraid of, i returned the question, at which he looked queer. we passed the gulf about which he wanted to talk, and i again asked him if he was “a-feared.”
it was not long before i found out my old school-fellows, christopher and philip gregson, my old companion, william gray, then a bookbinder in chancery lane, and my friend, robert pollard. the first had provided me with a lodging, and the last—through the kindness and influence of his master, isaac taylor—with plenty of work. before commencing work, i thought it best to take a ramble through the city and its environs. the first day i went alone, and saw nobody i knew. on the second day, i fell in—by chance—with sergeant hymers, in the strand, who, on seeing me, seemed quite surprised. he held up both his hands—he looked—he laughed—shook me by the hand, over and over again, and seemed not to know how to be kind enough. he then took me back with him till he got dressed; and, when this was done, he made a very handsome appearance indeed. the rest of the day he devoted wholly to my service. he first took me to the blackguard places in london. i suppose this was done with a view to corroborate the truth of the stories he had told me before, in newcastle. after i had seen enough of these places, he took me to others better worth notice; and, having rambled about till i had seen a good deal of the exterior as well as the interior of london—of which it would be superfluous to give an account—i sat down closely to work until i got through the wood cuts which, through isaac taylor’s kindness, had been provided for me. i then called upon thomas hodgson, printer, george court, clerkenwell, who had also provided work for me, to meet my arrival in london, and who had impatiently waited for my assistance.[19] i was subsequently employed by mr. carnan, and by mr. newberry, of st. paul’s church yard.
having served my time as a kind of “jack of all trades,” i felt desirous to work amongst the cockneys, to see if i could find anything amongst them; but in this i was disappointed; for i was never permitted to see any of them at work. they, indeed, seemed desirous of seeing what i was doing, and occasionally peeped in upon me for that purpose. i thought such of them as did so were a most saucy, ignorant, and impudent set. wherever i went, the ignorant part of the cockneys called me “scotchman.” at this i was not offended; but, when they added other impudent remarks, i could not endure them; and this often led me into quarrels of a kind i wished to avoid, and had not been used to engage in.
it is not worth while noticing these quarrels, but only as they served to help out my dislike to london. they were only trivial compared to other matters. one of the first things that struck me, and that constantly hurt my feelings, was the seeing such a number of fine-looking women engaged in the wretched business of “street-walking.” of these i often enquired as to the cause of their becoming so lost to themselves and to the world. their usual reply was that they had been basely seduced, and then basely betrayed. this i believed, and was grieved to think that they were thus, perhaps, prevented from becoming the best of mothers to an offspring of lovely and healthy children. i often told them so; and this ended in their tears: and, if they were in poverty, i contributed my mite to relieve them. what a pity it is that this wretchedness is not prevented. base men treat women as if they were inferior beings, made only to be used like brutes and tyrannized over as slaves. i have always beheld such conduct towards women with abhorrence; for my conceptions of this wretched state of things are of the most soul-harrowing description. it would be extreme weakness to maintain an opinion that all women are good, and that the faults here noticed are always ascribable to the men only. this is not the case; for i am obliged to admit that there are good and bad of each sex. i have often attempted to make an estimate of their comparative numbers, in which i have felt some difficulties. sometimes my barometer of estimation has risen to the height of ten to one in favour of the fair sex; at other times it has fluctuated, and has fallen down some degrees lower in the scale; but, with me, it is now settled, and i cannot go lower than four good women to one good man. i have often wondered how any man could look healthy, beautiful, sensible, and virtuous women in the face without considering them as the link between men and angels. for my part, i have often felt myself so overpowered with reverence in their presence that i have been almost unable to speak, and they must often have noticed my embarrassment. i could mention the names of many, but it might offend their delicacy. when a man can get such a helpmate for life, his happiness must be secured; for such a one is of inestimable value: “her price is far above rubies.”
i often spent my evenings at the “george,” in brook street, kept by a person of the name of darby, whose wife, a cumberland woman, claimed a distant relationship to me. at this house, i met with some very respectable and pleasant tradesmen. while i was there one evening, a stranger to me joined us. i think he was a traveller. he had, however, been in scotland, and had a mighty itch to speak very disrespectfully of that country, and was vociferous in attempting to entertain the company with his account of the filth and dirt he had met with in it. this i could not bear: their kindness was fresh in my memory; and i felt resentment rising in me. i, however, quashed that feeling, and only told him that i believed i had travelled on foot, perhaps, about three hundred miles through scotland, and had met with no such people there, nor such dirtiness as he described. there might, indeed, be some such in every country for aught i knew; but i was confident such might be found without going much beyond the street we were in, and who, in addition to their filthiness, were also the most wretched and abandoned of the human race. some of them, indeed, appeared to me to be scarcely human. i concluded by observing that i was afraid he had been keeping very bad company in scotland. a laugh by this was raised against him, and he felt him himself quashed by his own folly.
i very frequently visited westminster abbey, on some part of the sunday; and, on the forenoons of that day, i mostly went with my friend pollard to hear the rev. — harrison, at st. andrew’s church, holborn. i sometimes, also, went to hear eminent preachers at other places. i was once invited by my friend william watson, of the treasury, who had married the eldest miss beilby, to go with him to hear the rev. dr. dodd preach at the magdalen chapel. whether this was at the time he was arrested for forgery i am not certain, but i know i did not see him. i also went with mr. watson to hear the rev. — maxwell, another eminent divine; but, indeed, i believe i did not miss hearing any of the popular preachers in london.
for many years after i left london, i went to hear the preachers of various persuasions, and attempted to find out the general character of their several congregations. having been brought up under the creeds and doctrines of the church of england, i may, perhaps, have some partialities about me respecting that church, but i have ever considered that its clergy are the most learned of any, and that, excepting some of the higher orders of them, they, as well as their hearers, are the most tolerant. i have always felt grieved that a great number of them should consist of very learned and good men with curacies or poor livings that do not afford them a much better income than the wages of common mechanics; and that, however great their abilities may be, it is only by patronage that they can be advanced, while enormous stipends are lavished upon others, very often for the most useless, or, perhaps, the most corrupt purposes. i think it would be much better if the incomes of the clergy could be equalized; for, so long as matters are managed otherwise, so long will it be considered as a system of revenue of which religion is only the pretext.
but it is unnecessary here to dwell on these opinions of mine. every man should be welcome to follow his own opinions on the all-important subject of religion. if these are founded in truth, there can be no fear of their being injured by unreserved discussion. whatever the creed may be, there can be no objection to the religion of a virtuous man; and it is to be hoped that the distinctions and bickerings amongst different denominations of christians will cease, and the causes of them be thought of no more importance than whether a man uses his quid of tobacco in the right cheek or in the left.
after this digression, i must now turn my attention again to london. my friend mr. watson was very desirous to get me work with mr. pingo, in the mint; and, from his being so well-known and respected by the gentlemen in most of the government offices, he thought this might be easily accomplished. my mind was, however, bent quite another way, and no more was done for me in that business. the constant attention and kindness of my london friends, whose company i enjoyed, was unabated. they walked with me everywhere, and the house of william gray was a home to me. i met other newcastle friends, every monday night, at the “hole-in-the-wall,” fleet street, where i went to see the newcastle newspapers. some of these occasionally wanted assistance, and got my last sixpence. at this time i earned a deal of money; and, from my habits of temperance, i spent little for my own living, and thus discovered what a small sum was sufficient to make me independent, and i never lost sight of the inestimable value of being so. i, however, never had a surplus of cash long in my possession; for one or another had occasion for it, and i could not bear to see distress without relieving it.
notwithstanding my being so situated amongst my friends, and being so much gratified in seeing such a variety of excellent performances in every art and science,—painting, statuary, engraving, carving, &c.,—yet i did not like london. it appeared to me to be a world of itself, where everything in the extreme might at once be seen: extreme riches, extreme poverty, extreme grandeur, and extreme wretchedness—all of which were such as i had not contemplated before. perhaps i might, indeed, take too full a view of london on its gloomy side. i could not help it. i tired of it, and determined to return home. the country of my old friends—the manners of the people of that day—the scenery of tyneside—seemed altogether to form a paradise for me, and i longed to see it again. while i was thus turning these matters over in my mind, my warm friend and patron, isaac taylor, waited upon me: and, on my telling him i was going to newcastle, he enquired how long it would be before i returned. “never,” was my reply; at which he seemed both surprised and displeased. he then warmly remonstrated with me upon this impropriety of my conduct, told me of the prospects before me, and, amongst many other matters, that of his having engaged me to draw in the duke of richmond’s gallery; and he strenuously urged me to change my mind. i told him that no temptation of gain, of honour, or of anything else, however great, could ever have any weight with me; and that i would even enlist for a soldier, or go and herd sheep at five shillings per week, as long as i lived, rather than be tied to live in london. i told him how sensible i was of his uncommon kindness to me, and thanked him for it. my kind friend left me in the pet, and i never saw him more. he afterwards, when an old man, visited newcastle, but left it again without my knowing it till after he was gone. at this i felt much grieved and disappointed. i do not remember how long he lived after this; but a memoir of him was published in the “analytical magazine” at the time, together with a letter i had written to him sometime before his death, which he never answered. he was, in his day, accounted the best engraver of embellishments for books, most of which he designed himself. the frontispiece to the first edition of “cunningham’s poems” was one of his early productions; and at that time my friend pollard and myself thought it was the best thing that ever was done.[20]
the same kind persuasions were urged upon me by mr. hodgson, to remain in london, as had been used by mr. taylor, which ended in a similar way. the former, however, went further, and told me that, if i were determined upon leaving london, and would continue to work for him in newcastle, he would furnish me with plenty of it; and that he would begin by giving me as much as would keep me employed for two years. this was particularly pleasing to me, because i could not bear the thoughts of beginning business in newcastle in opposition to my old master, for whom i had the greatest respect.
having spent the evening till a late hour with my friends at the “george,” in brook street, and in the morning taken leave of my landlord and landlady, mr. and mrs. kendal, and their family, in wharton’s court, holborn, i then posted off to the pool, and got on board a collier; and, after a very short passage, arrived in sight of st. nicholas’ church steeple, about the 22nd june, 1777.
