笔下文学
会员中心 我的书架
当前位置:笔下文学 > Dawn

Chapter 28

(快捷键←)[上一章]  [回目录]  [下一章](快捷键→)

basil and his sister sat longer that summer evening than was their wont. there was a deeper intoning of sentiment, a closer blending of thought, or rather, their individual states had been more clearly defined by the day's incidents.

they were of those rare types of mind which know just how far they can be together, and not detract from each other; just when the mental and spiritual assimilation was becoming attenuated, and each needed solitude. thus they were constantly coming each to the other, and consequently drew from exhaustless fountains of intellectual and physical strength.

life is replete with harmonies ready to inflow, if we are but receptive and delicate enough to receive and appropriate them. blest are they who recognize life's indications, its index-fingers which are pointing each hour to some new experience, which will deepen and expand our lives.

generally there is great danger of two persons settling into themselves, as these two seemed to have done, but basil and beatrice were so catholic they could afford it, in fact they needed just the close companionship which they held. the brother, with his colossal spirit, lofty and original, moving forward through life with that slow majesty which indicates the wholeness of the individual, unlike the airy advance of natures which rush with but one faculty quickened, and mistake speed for greatness, supplied the sister with that manly, noble quality, which must ever exist in the real or ideal of every woman. no wonder her warm, beneficent nature expanded daily, until her heart seemed a garden full of flowers of love and gratitude.

did life at times seem dim and hazy, and the mind full of a thousand doubts, he could dispel the cloud, wrench the truth from its old combinations, and present it to her in striking contrast with its opposite error.

no wonder that new purposes and aspirations were born every hour in that woman's heart, impregnated by his manliness of quality. yet each drew through the subtle texture of soul a different hue of life, as in a bed of flowers, from the same sunlight, one draws crimson, another azure, as though conscious of the harmony of complement and difference.

"i feel a rich, deep vein of thought to-night," said beatrice, "as though i could write a poem or a book, so vivid are my thoughts."

"your life has been a poem, full of sweetly blended words. you have lived yours out, while others have written theirs."

"but there is such power in books, basil."

"i know it well. 'some books are drenched sands on which a great soul's wealth lies all in heaps, like a wrecked argosy.' and some are sweet and full of passion-tones, and you feel on every leaf that you are turning, as though their heart-beats were going into yours; that they were dying that you might have life. books are indeed great, but lives are greater; lives that are full of earnest purpose, and that fail not, even though the tide beats strong about them and the heavens hang thick and dark with clouds. the greatest poems are true lives, now surging with grief and passion, now pulsing with joy-notes, thrilling on each page of life. some books, as well as persons, make us feel as though we stood in the presence of a king, while some give us tears. some books and some beings dome us like a sky. sister, you are the dome which ever overarches my life,--if day, with its azure and ermine clouds; if night, with its stars. nay, do not write a book, but breathe and live your life out each day."

"yet i know that you, basil, could write one, and make it full and perfect."

"i could make one full of words, if not of thought; but come, the night is passing, we shall scarce have an hour's rest before sunrise."

"indeed, i think we are in a fair way to see its early brightness."

to their dreams and life we will leave them awhile, knowing that to such hearts will ever come peace, whether sleeping or waking.

past midnight, that silent hour when the earth is peopled with other forms. it is the hour for the brain to receive the most subtle influences, whether sleeping or waking.

some kinds of sleep bring us brighter states than day gives us. they are awakenings, in which the understanding, instead of being dethroned, acquires a power and vivacity beyond what it possesses when the external form is awake and active. the soul seems emancipated from earthly trammels. the ruling thought of a man's life is not unlikely to shape itself into dreams, the constant thought of the day may encroach on the quiet of the night. thus columbus dreamed that a voice said unto him, "god will give thee the keys of the gates of the ocean." so any earnest longing, resting on our minds when we composed ourselves to sleep, may pass over into our sleeping consciousness, and be reproduced, perhaps in some happier mood.

modern writers on the phenomena of sleep, usually concur in the assertion that man's sleeping thoughts are meaningless, and that dreams are, therefore, untrustworthy. such was not the opinion of our ancestors. they attached great importance to dreams and their interpretations. they had resort to them for guidance in cases of difficulty, or great calamity. we do not claim for all dreams, a divine or reliable character, but that some are to be trusted, every individual of any experience can testify. plato assumes that all dreams might be trusted, if men would only bring their bodies into such a state, before going to sleep, as to leave nothing that might occasion error or perturbation in their dreams.

a young lady, a native of ross-shire, in scotland, who was devotedly attached to an officer, with sir john moore in the spanish war, became alarmed at the constant danger to which her lover was exposed, until she pined, and fell into ill health. finally, one night in a dream, she saw him pale, bloody, and wounded in the breast, enter her apartment. he drew aside the curtains of the bed, and with a mild look, told her he had been slain in battle, bidding her, at the same time, to be comforted, and not take his death to heart.

the consequence of the dream was fatal to the poor girl, who died a few days afterward, desiring her parents to note down the date of her dream, which she was confident would be confirmed. it was so. the news shortly after reached england that the officer had fallen at the battle of corunna, on the very day in the night of which his betrothed had beheld the vision.

another, a lady residing in rome, dreamed that her mother, who had been several years dead, appeared to her, gave her a lock of hair, and said, "be especially careful of this lock of hair, my child, for it is your father's, and the angels will call him away from you to-morrow."

the effect of the dream on her mind was such, that, when she awoke, she experienced the greatest alarm, and caused a telegraphic notice to be instantly dispatched to england, were her father was, to inquire after his health. no immediate reply was received; but, when it did come, it was to the effect that her father had died that morning at nine o'clock. she afterwards learned, that, two days before his death, he had caused to be cut off, a lock of his hair, and handed it to one of his daughters, who was attending on him, telling her it was for her sister in rome.

well authenticated cases might be multiplied till they filled volumes; but the two we have cited, suffice to prove that in sleeping, as well as in waking hours, our minds may receive impressions of truth, or, that the spirit goes out to other scenes, and there takes cognizance of events and conditions.

dawn slept on; her beautiful white face was still and upturned, as though gazing into the heavens. the excitement of the day had gone, and the look of keen pleasure on her features was changed to one of intensest emotion, for she was away, her spirit beside one whose life seemed almost ebbing out of this state of existence. she saw his pale features half hidden in the snowy pillows, the deep, soft eyes looking as though in search of one they loved; and then she heard him call her name, in tones touching and tender. she wept, and awoke. the sun was shining brightly through the window. she arose, and dressed for her departure, and, to the surprise of her friend, announced her intention of leaving that morning for home.

"you are no more to be depended on than the rest of your sex, miss wyman," remarked mr. austin, who really enjoyed having her with them.

she was in no mood to reply in the same spirit, but said quietly:

"i have concluded not to tire you out completely this time, for i want to come again."

"i think your going must be the result of some very hasty conclusion, dawn. i had no intimation of it last evening. really, unless you are ill, you are quite unfair to leave us so soon." mrs. austin having made this remark, glanced for the first time at dawn's white face. what had come over her? was it dawn who sat there so still and white? "are you ill?" she asked, the tremor of her voice betraying her deep solicitude for the welfare of her visitor.

"no; but anxious. i must go to-day, however, or i shall be sick, and on your hands."

"i'd a deal rather you should be on my hands, than weighing on my heart, as you are now," and mrs. austin expressed the hope, after her husband had left, that she would confide to her the cause of her departure and sudden appearance of illness.

"i have had an unpleasant dream," said dawn, when they were alone, feeling that some explanation was due her friend, "and i must go home."

"a dream! o, fie, i never mind them. why, i once had a most frightful one about ned. he was away on a journey, and i dreamt that the boat caught fire, and every one on board was lost. i even went so far as too see a messenger coming to tell me of the disaster."

"but had not your mind been agitated through the day?"

"why, i had read of some dreadful disasters, to be sure, and then i had retired at a late hour, after getting my mind wrought up about the liabilities of danger, which, of course, accounted for it-but was your dream about your father?"

"no."

"why must you go? do you think any one is in danger? i think it was the result of the long ride, don't you?

"i do not. my dream was purely impressional, and outside of the effect of daily incidents. yes, i must go, fannie, and right away."

"in that case i shall ride home with you," and she rang for the man to harness the horse.

each busy with her own thoughts they rode in silence for a long distance, a silence which was only broken by dawn's exclamation of pleasure, as they came in sight of her home.

the next day she sat beside the bed of ralph, whose snow-white face and attenuated form, showed how fast he was passing away.

he gazed long and tenderly into her face, as she sat there, their souls holding their last earthly communion. his spirit was all aglow with life, and trust, while the shadow of separation rested on her, and dimmed her faith and vision.

"but for a little while, dawn, and then we shall meet again; perhaps, to be united."

how the words entered her heart, for now, under the cloud, she felt, o how keenly, that her state had hastened him home. his was the vine-like nature that must cling to another, or die. it was all dark to her then, and added to the pang of separation, was the thought of her cold indifference. he, all gentleness and love, lie in rays of light; all her vision and life had gone into him to help him over the river.

"and you do not dread to go, ralph?" she said, her voice choking with emotion.

"fear? i only long to do so; to be there, where all is peace and rest;" and the rapt, upturned gaze, confirmed his words.

"it will be always day there," he continued; "none of these weary nights which have been so long and lonely-"

"o, ralph, live; live for me. i have been blind and wayward. o, come back, and we will live for each other."

"in my father's house are many mansions; i go to prepare a place for you."

the words sounded far, far away.

"yes, we will live together above, not here. god has so ordered it, my own dawn. i shall be light, perhaps, to you, even in that far-off land. nay, 'tis not 'far'; 't is here. i shall dwell in your heart close-close-closer than ever."

he closed his eyes and rested for a few moments. then, arousing, he clasped her hands firmly, as though he would bear her away with him as he took his heavenward flight.

"look there," he said, "the river! go close with me-for this is our last moment. dawn, i am yours; not even death can part us. i am not going; i am coming closer than any earthly relation could bring me to you; coming-call them."

parents and sister stood beside the bed with tearful eyes. to them he was going far away.

dawn saw not the death-dew on the marble brow, nor heeded the passing breath. another sight was given her, and while they stood so statue-like with anguish, her eyes beheld a soft mist gather like snowflakes on the head; and while the breath grew quick and short, this seemed to pulsate with life, until a face was outlined there. that face the same, yet not the same, but her own dear ralph's, immortalized, set in a softer, finer light. her being pulsated with new joy. a tide of life seemed to have flown into her heart, leaving no room for pain.

a moan struck on her ear; so sad that she started, and the vision fled.

"o, ralph, my own loved boy; he's gone, he's gone," burst from the mother's sorrowing heart, as they bore her from the room.

marion stood dumb with grief, while the poor stricken father bowed his head and wept bitter tears for his lost son.

had dawn no grief, that she could stand there and look so calmly on? what made her feel so indifferent to the dead form on which she gazed? because his life, the life that had once animated it, had passed into hers, and they were one and united. ralph, warm with life, was imaged in her heart and mind. the clay he bore about him, that husk, had no claim upon her being now, and with scarce a look at the body, she walked away.

"i think she could never have loved him, or she would not seem so cold," were the words that floated to her as she passed from the room where lay all that was mortal of ralph.

it was as near as she could expect to be understood here, in a world where so much of her real self was hidden; but such words touched her sensibilities none the less, notwithstanding her philosophy. they went deep, like an arrow, into her heart, and then she knew that the house of mourning was no place for her; that she must go, and to the world appear cold and unfeeling, while her heart was ready to burst with its deep emotion.

she left them, and they never knew how dearly she loved him, nor how close his soul was linked with her own. they mourned him as dead, while to her he became each hour a reality, a tangible, living presence, full of tenderness and love.

miss weston met dawn as she passed out of the house, with that look of tender pity, which says, "i know you suffer." in that look their souls met and mounted to higher states. they could not speak, for the tears which flowed over the graves of their dead; their sorrows made them one and akin.

"you will return by to-morrow," said miss weston, as she parted with dawn at the gate, supposing that she designed returning to be present at the funeral.

"no, i cannot."

"why, dawn! not follow dear ralph to his grave?"

"i have no ralph to bury. he is resurrected-gone higher."

"but the family, they surely-"

"they will not miss me. i am not a part of their lives now. they do not know me, nor do i know myself."

here trust, light, and vision left; the weakness of flesh uprose, and she went down into the dark valley of grief.

she gave a parting pressure of the hand to her friend, and walked slowly to the station. alone; o, what relief do our tears give us, when no one can see them flow. in that dim, summer twilight she walked. fast fell the tears over her cheeks. none but angels knew the sobs, the agony of desolation which swept over her, and like a pall hung between herself and heaven.

it was midnight when she arose from prayer, but morning to her soul. peace had come; the dove had returned with the olive branch; the waters had gone down, and green banks shored the wild sea of sorrow.

she spent the day of the funeral ceremonies alone in the solitude of the woods. full of meaning now came to her these words of christ: "let the dead bury their dead;" and this was her first personal realization of the truth. alone, yet not alone. that presence, unseen, but real, was with her, soothing the harshness of sorrow, filling her heart with peace and comfort. just as the sun sank in clouds of sapphire and crimson, his form stood, radiant, joyous, and life-like before her. it was no myth, no hallucination of the mind. close, within reach, yet she could not touch him; he stood there, the same ralph, with all the tenderness of love on his beaming face which he bore in life. no loneliness came over her as the vision faded slowly away; he seemed to dissolve and flow into her heart. the soft twilight, the singing of birds, and charming landscape, with the breath of summer floating on the air, came like sweet accompaniments to the melody which was pulsing her being, and giving her new strength and vigor for life.

she knew, that to her ralph would each day be a sustaining power, and give life a dual action. when weary of the outer, she could turn within and find one conjoined by the holiest of ties unto her soul.

his life, too, was being unfolded through her, as it could never have been on earth; and as years rolled on she saw how well and good it was that he had passed on before her. there was more completeness to her being than there could possibly have been, had they been united on earth by the form of marriage.

when she emerged from the cloud, all this light transfused her being, and she had no tears, because there was no separation.

先看到这(加入书签) | 推荐本书 | 打开书架 | 返回首页 | 返回书页 | 错误报告 | 返回顶部