the word was like the lash of a whip. he stared at the patriot open-mouthed.
“yes, poland,” said boronowski. “why not? you want to fight for a great cause. is not a free and independent poland the keystone of the arch of reconstructed europe? it is a commonplace axiom. poland overthrown, overrun with bolshevism, all europe crumbles into dust. the world is convulsed. fighting for poland is fighting for the salvation of the world. could there be a greater cause?”
his dark eyes glowed with compelling inspiration. his outflung arm ended in a pointing finger. and triona saw it as the finger of salvation yeo in his boyhood’s picture.
“wonderful, wonderful,” he said, below his breath.
“and simple. come with me to warsaw. i have friends of some influence. otherwise i should not be here. the polish army would welcome you with open arms.”
triona thrust out a sudden hand, which the other gripped.
“by god!” he cried, “i’ll come.”
an hour afterwards, his brain dominated by the new idea, he danced his way through the melancholy streets. here, indeed, was salvation. here he could live the life of truth. here was the glorious chance—although he would never see her on earth again—of justifying himself in olivia’s eyes. and in itself it was a marvellous adventure. there would be endless days when he should live for the hour that he was alive, without thought of an unconjecturable to-morrow. into the cause of poland he would fling his soul. yes, boronowski was right. the sovereign remedy. his individual life—what did it matter to him? all the beloved things were past and gone. they lay already on the further side of the valley of the shadow of death. his personality was merged into a self-annihilating creature that would henceforth be the embodiment of a spiritual idea.
thus for the rest of the day, and during the night, his mind worked. arrived in poland, he would press for the fiercest section of the front. the bullet that killed him would be welcome. he would die gloriously. olivia should know.
as john briggs, with his papers in order, he found his passport a simple matter. boronowski, with whom he spent most of his time, obtained a speedy visa at the polish and other consulates. during the period of waiting he went carefully through the contents of the suit-case and removed all traces of the name and initials of alexis triona. the little black book he burned page by page with matches in the empty grate of his room. when it was consumed, he felt himself rid of an evil thing. in strange east london emporiums, unknown to dwellers in the west end, and discovered by restless wandering, he purchased an elementary kit for the campaign. much of his time he spent in boronowski’s quarters in somers town, reading propaganda pamphlets and other literature dealing with polish actualities. when the polish army welcomed him with open arms, they must find him thoroughly equipped. he bought a polish grammar, and compiled with boronowski a phrase-book so as to be prepared with an elementary knowledge of the language. the pole marvelled at his fervour.
“you spring at things like an intellectual tiger,” said he, “and then fasten on to them with the teeth of a bulldog.”
“i’m a quick worker when i concentrate,” said triona.
and for many days he concentrated, sleeping and eating little, till his cheeks grew gaunt and his eyes bright and haggard. in his interminable talks with boronowski, he concentrated all his faculties, until the patriot would laugh and accuse him of a tigerish spring on the secrets of his soul.
“it’s true,” cried triona, “it’s the soul of poland i want to make enter my being. to serve you to any purpose i must see through polish eyes and feel with a polish heart, and feel my veins thrill with the spirituality of poland.”
“is that possible?”
“you shall see,” answered triona.
and just as he had fallen under the obsession of the dead krilov during the night watches in the north sea, so did he fall under the obsession of this new great cause. something fundamentally histrionic in his temperament flung him into these excesses of impersonation. already he began to regret his resumption of the plain name of john briggs. even in the pre-war russian days he had seldom been addressed by it. for the first social enquiry in russia elicited the christian name of a man’s father. and his father’s name being peter, he was called by all and sundry ivan petrovitch. so that even then, in his fervent zeal to merge himself into the russian spirit, he had grown to regard the two downright words of his name as meaningless monosyllables. but he strangled the regret fiercely as soon as it arose.
“no, by heaven!” said he, “no more lies.”
and yet, in spite of unalterable resolve, as he lay sleepless with overwrought nerves in the sour room in the euston road, he was haunted by lunatic polish forms, brigiovski, brigowski, which he might adopt without breaking his vow; he could not see himself in the part of a polish patriot labelled as john briggs; just as well might a great actor seek to identify himself with hamlet while wearing cricketing flannels and a bowler hat.
only once in his talks with boronowski did he refer to the unhappiness to which he was to apply the sovereign remedy. the days were passing without sign of immediate departure. boronowski, under the orders of his superiors, must await instructions. triona chafed at the delay.
boronowski smiled indulgently.
“the first element in devotion to a cause, or a woman, is patience. illimitable patience. the demands of a cause are very much like those of a woman, apparently illogical and capricious, but really inexorable and unswerving in their purpose.”
“it’s all very well to talk of patience,” triona fumed, “but when one is hag-ridden as i am——”
boronowski smiled again. “histoire de femme——”
triona flushed scarlet and sprang to his feet.
“how dare you twist my words like that?”
boronowski looked at him for a puzzled moment, seeking the association of ideas. then, grasping it:
“forgive me, my friend,” he said courteously. “my english, after all, is that of a foreigner. the word connection was far from my mind. i took your speech to mean that you were driven by unhappiness. and the unhappiness of a young man is so often—— again, i beg your pardon.”
triona passed his hand through his brown hair.
“all right,” he said, “i’m sorry. yes. if you want to know, it’s a woman. she’s the day-spring from on high, and i’m damned beyond redemption. the best thing that could happen would be if she knew i were dead.”
boronowski tugged at his little greyish-red beard. a follower of great causes was never the worse for having the furies at his heels. but he was a man of kindly nature.
“no one while he is alive can be damned beyond redemption,” he said. “i don’t wish to press my indiscretion further. yet, as an older man, could i be of service to you in any way?”
“no, you’re very kind, but no one can help me.” then an idea flashed across his excited brain. “not until i’m dead. then, perhaps, you might do something for me.”
“you’re not going to die yet, my friend.”
“how do we know? i’m going to fight. the first day i may get knocked out. should anything happen to me, would you kindly communicate with some one?”
he moved to the paper-littered table and began to scribble.
“it’s all rather premature, my friend,” said boronowski. “but as you wish.” he took the scrap of paper which bore the name and address of major olifant. “this i may be liable to lose. i will enter it in my notebook.” he made the entry. then, “may i say a serious word to you?”
“anything you like.”
“there is such a thing as the fire of purification. but—” he put a hand on the younger man’s shoulder, “you can’t call it down from heaven. you must await its coming. so we get back to my original remark. patience, more patience, and always patience.”
this was consoling for the moment; but after a few days’ further grappling with the polish language, he burst into boronowski’s lodgings and found the patriot at his table, immersed in work.
“if we don’t start soon,” he cried, “i’ll go mad. i haven’t slept for nights and nights. i’ll only sleep when we are on our journey, and i know that all this is reality and not a dream.”
“i’ve just had orders,” replied boronowski. “we start to-morrow morning. here are our tickets.”
that night, triona wrote to olivia. it was an eternal farewell. on the morrow he was leaving england to offer up his unworthy life as a sacrifice to the great cause of poland. the only reparation he could make for the wrong he had done her was to beseech her to look on him as one already dead. it covered many pages.
when he returned to his musty room after this last hour’s heart-breaking communion with her, he sat on his bed overwhelmed by sudden despair. what guarantee had she of this departure for poland greater than that of his mission to helsingfors last summer? would she not throw the letter aside in disgust—another romantic lie? he wished he had not written. he took faint hope again on the reflection that by posting another letter from warsaw he could establish his veracity. but why should he keep on worrying her with the details of his miserable existence? better, far better that she should look on him as dead; better, far better that she should believe him dead, so that she could reconstruct her young and broken life. he might die in battle; but then he might not. he had already carried his life safely through battles by land and sea. again he might come out unscathed. even if he was killed, how should she hear of his death? and if he survived, was it fair that she should be bound by law eternally to a living ghost? somebody had said that before. it was olifant. olifant, the fool out for grails, yet speaking the truth of chivalry. well, this time—he summoned up the confidence of dismal hope—he would make sure that he was dead and that she heard the news. at any rate, he had prepared the ground; boronowski would communicate with olifant.
then came a knock at his door—it was nearly midnight. the night porter entered. a man downstairs wished to see him—a foreigner. a matter of urgent importance.
“show him up,” said triona.
he groaned, put both his hands up to his head. he did not want to see boronowski to-night. his distraught brain could not stand the patriot’s tireless lucidity of purpose. boronowski belonged to the inhuman band of fanatics, the devotees to one idea, who had nothing personal to sacrifice. just like lonely old maids who gave themselves up to church-going and good works, and thereby plumed themselves on the acquisition of immortal merit. what soul-shattering tragedy had boronowski behind him, any more than the elderly virgins aforesaid? if boronowski kept him up talking poland till three o’clock in the morning—as he had already done—he would go mad. no, not to-night. the mounting steps on the uncarpeted stairs hammered at every nerve in his body. and when the door opened, it was not boronowski who appeared, but a pallid, swarthy wisp of a man whom triona recognized as one klinski, a jew, and a trusted agent of boronowski. he was so evilly dressed that the night porter, accustomed to the drab clientele of the sad hostelry, yet thought it his duty to linger by the door.
triona dismissed him sharply.
“what’s the matter?” he asked in russian, for he was aware of the man’s scanty english.
klinski did not know. he was but the bearer of a letter, a large envelope, which he drew from his breast pocket. triona tore it open. it contained two envelopes and a covering letter. the letter ran:
“my dear friend,
“a sudden change in the political situation has made it necessary for me to go—where i must not tell you. so, to my great regret, i cannot accompany you. you, however, will start by the morning train, as arranged. the route, as you know, is paris, zurich, saltzburg, and prague. i enclose letters to sound friends in prague and warsaw who will relieve you of all worries and responsibilities. if you do not hear from me in prague, where i should like you to remain one week—it is a beautiful city, and the czecho-slovak republic is one of the most interesting outcomes of the war—await instructions at warsaw. but i anticipate picking you up in prague.
“yours,
“boronowski.”
a moment ago, he had dreaded the interruption of boronowski on his nerve-racked vigil. now the dismayed prospect of a journey across europe alone awoke within him a sudden yearning for boronowski’s society. a dozen matters could be cleared up in an hour’s talk. suppose boronowski’s return to warsaw were indefinitely delayed.
“thanks very much,” he said. “i’ll take back the answer to mr. boronowski myself.”
“there can be no answer,” said klinski.
“why?”
“mr. boronowski left his lodgings early this evening, and has gone—who knows where?”
triona shrugged his shoulders. it was the uncomfortable way of conspirators all the world over. to himself he cursed it with heatedness, but to no avail.
“why didn’t you bring the letter before?” he asked.
“i have had many messages to deliver to-night, sir,” said klinski, “and i have not finished.”
the stunted, pallid man looked tired out, half-starved. triona drew from his pocket a ten-shilling note. klinski drew back a step.
“i thank you. but in the service of my country i can only accept payment from my government.”
triona regarded him in admiration.
“it must be a great country!”
“it is,” said klinski, with a light in his eyes.
“and i’m proud to go and fight for her.”
“it’s a privilege that i envy you,” said klinski. “may god preserve you.”
driven by the impossibility of sleep in the frowsy room, by the incurable wander-fever which took him at periods of unrest, he found himself an hour later standing before the block of flats in the buckingham palace road, staring up at the windows of his home. in the bedroom was a faint streak of light quite visible from below through a crack in the curtains. he remembered how, a year ago, he had been compelled by a similar impulse, to stand romantically beneath the building which housed her sacredness, and how the gods, smiling on him, had delivered her into his rescuing hands. and now there were no gods—or if there were, they did but mock him. no white wraith would appear on the pavement, turning to warm flesh and blood, demanding his succour. she was up there, wakeful, behind that streak of light.
he stood racked by an agony of temptation. the yale latch key was still at the end of his watch-chain. he was her husband. he had the right of entrance. his being clamoured for her, and found utterance in a horrible little cry. the light invited him like a beacon. yes. he would cross the road. perhaps the fool olifant was right. she might yet love him. and then, as if in answer to his half-crazed imaginings, the light went out.
he turned, and walked wearily back across sleeping london.
it was four o’clock when the night porter admitted him. he stumbled to his room. as his train left victoria at eight, it would be an absurdity to undress and go to bed. utterly weary, he threw himself on it as he was, his brain whirling. there could be no question of sleep.
yet suddenly he became conscious of daylight. he started up and looked at his watch. it was past seven. he had slept after all. he made a perfunctory toilet and hurriedly completed his neglected packing. the drowsy night porter, on duty till eight, tardily answered his summons, and took his suit-case to the shabby vestibule. triona followed, with heavy great coat and canvas kit-bag, his purchases for the campaign. the porter suggested breakfast. there was no time. luckily he had paid his bill the evening before. all he demanded was a taxi.
but at that early hour of the morning there were none, save a luggage-laden few bound for st. pancras or king’s cross.
“i can’t leave the hotel, sir,” said the porter, “or i would get you one from euston.”
“i’ll find one, then,” said triona, and putting on the heavy khaki coat and gripping suit-case in one hand and kit-bag in the other, he set off along the euston road. as he neared the station entrance, he staggered along, aching and sweating. what a fool he had been not to foresee this idiot difficulty! what a fool he had been to give way to sleep. he came in view of the clock. given a cab, he would still have time to catch the train at victoria. he had it on his brain that his salvation depended on his catching the train at victoria. he stumbled into the outer court, past the hotel wings. an outgoing taxi-cab swirled towards him. he dropped his burdens and stood in its path with upheld arms. there was a sudden pandemonium of hoarse cries, a sounding of brakes. he glanced round just in time to see, for a fraction of a second, the entering motor-lorry which struck him down.
