in which soles are beaten and men are sold—with plots and counterplots.
comfortably ensconced in the palace of the deys—elected by a majority of his comrades—the aga hamet proceeded to enjoy his high position, and to exercise the authority of ruler of the pirate city.
the day after his ascension of what we may call the dangerous throne, he sent for hadji baba the story-teller.
“thou art a witty fellow, it seems?” said the dey, when baba made his appearance.
“so it has been said of me, and so i once thought,” replied the jester humbly; “but i have come to doubt the worth of my own wit, since it has led me to dwell in a palace.”
“how so, knave? what mean you?”
“in truth, i know not,” replied baba. “my wit is scarce sufficient to make my meaning plain even to myself. only i feel that the brilliancy of the wit of those who dwell in palaces is too much for me. ’twere better, methinks, if i had remained on my shoemaker’s bench.”
“’twere indeed better for thee to have done so, good fellow, if thou canst say nothing better than that,” replied hamet angrily, for he was a stupid as well as an ambitious man. “let’s have something better from thee, else the bastinado shall drive sense from thy heels into thy head.”
“nay, then, it is hard,” returned baba, with a smile, “to be asked to talk sense when i was hired by thy late master—”
“my late master!” roared the dey.
“surely i said ‘my late master,’ did i not?” returned hadji baba, rubbing his forehead as if he were confused—as, in truth, the poor fellow was, by the terrible scenes that had lately been enacted in the palace. “as i meant to say, then,—it is hard for me to talk sense when my late master hired me expressly to talk nonsense.”
“h’m, yes, very true,” replied the dey, looking wise. “let me, then, hear some of thy nonsense.”
“ah, your highness, that is easily done,” said baba, with sudden animation. “what shall be the subject of my discourse?—the affairs of state?”
the dey nodded.
“let me, then, make a broad statement of a nonsensical kind, which, in its particular applications may be said to be endless. a throne won by treachery, violence, and bloodshed cannot stand long in—”
“villain!” shouted the dey.
“nay, i do but jest,” said baba, with a look of simplicity.
“jest or no jest, thou shalt smart for it,” cried the dey, whose anger had been greatly roused.—“ho! seize him and give him the bastinado, and afterwards bring him hither again.”
two chaouses, who were in attendance in a neighbouring room, at once entered, and, seizing the unfortunate story-teller, hurried him down to an apartment in the palace which was reserved for punishments of various kinds, including strangulation. here they stripped off baba’s embroidered shoes and white hose.
“we have long been fellow-servants under this roof,” said hadji baba, as they were about to begin.
“that is true,” replied one of the chaouses sternly.
“i shall be forgiven, and depend on it thou shalt not be forgotten,” said baba quietly.
the executioner, who knew that the story-teller had been a man of influence and power in the previous reign, hesitated.
“we have our orders, hadji baba,” said he, remonstratively, “and you know that it is as much as our lives are worth to fail in our obedience.”
“i bid you not to fail in the performance of your duty, but i counsel you to lay on lightly,” returned the jester, with a grim smile.
“and how if the dey should expect to hear thy cries, and afterwards to see thee limp into his presence?” asked the man in a tone of indecision.
“depend on’t he shall both see and hear,” exclaimed baba, with a laugh. “thinkest thou that my head is not equal to the saving of my feet? lay on lightly, so that there may be somewhat to show; but see thou dost not over-do it. i will engage to let the tyrant hear on the deafest side of his head, and will limp into his presence with most unfeigned sincerity.”
“well, then, i begin,” said the man, applying a few strokes with a lithe rod to the soles of the jester’s feet.
baba was true to his word. he suddenly gave vent to a yell so appalling that the very executioner, accustomed though he was to such sounds, quailed for a moment, and said anxiously—
“did i hit you too hard?”
“hard!” echoed baba, mingling a roar of laughter with his next yell. “fear not, good comrade; go on, do thy duty—ha! ha!—ho–o–o! stop! why, it is worse than i had imagined,” he added, as the man delivered a cut that was rather sharp. “but go on,” cried hadji baba, with another yell; “i must have something to show, and he shall smart for it.”
he followed up this remark with a series of amateur shrieks and howls so terrible that the hardened chaouses, being accustomed only to the genuine display of suffering, were overcome, and entreated him to desist.
the excitement of the exercise, the conflict of varied feelings, the smarting of his soles, the indignation of his soul, and the absurdity of the deception, had such an effect on hadji baba’s spirit, that he experienced no difficulty whatever in limping like a confirmed cripple, and trembling like an aspen leaf when led into the presence of the tyrant.
“ha!” exclaimed the dey, “i think i have cured thee. thou wilt talk no more nonsense, i warrant.”
“not a word, your highness, not a syllable,” exclaimed the jester, falling on his knees, as the executioners retired. “even though your highness were to hold the reins of power with a hand of gentleness and benignity, which i doubt not you will, i would not repeat such nonsense for the world.”
“gentleness and benignity,” laughed the dey, catching at the words, and paying little regard to what followed; “truly that were a novel feature in my character, as thou knowest well.—now, listen, rascal: as thy feet are in good walking trim, i have an errand for thee. go, tell sidi hassan that i want him, and see thou find him quickly, else another beating awaits thee.”
“your highness shall be obeyed,” said the jester, with a profound obeisance, as he turned and limped out of the room.
sidi hassan had left the service of the british consul, without leave, just before the insurrection, and was seated in his own town mansion, sipping a cup of coffee, and conversing with rais ali, when the message reached him.
“thou art but a cowardly fellow, a weak villain after all,” said hassan to some remark of the interpreter. “the man who plays fast and loose is sure to be brought low sooner or later. why not leave the british consul’s service now that a chance offers? it will be to thy advantage, for i can speak a good word for thee with the new dey.”
“because,” said rais ali anxiously, “although i have not a sensitive conscience, i cannot prevail on myself to betray my old master.”
“very good,” said hassan; “continue to vacillate until thy head is shaken off. adieu. i must not keep his highness waiting.”
so saying, he hastened to the palace, congratulating himself on the expected fulfilment of the promises which the late aga hamet had so lavishly made to him.
like many other sycophants, sidi hassan had mistaken his man. the new dey was well aware that hassan was a turbulent, ambitious character, and thought that it would be best for his own interests to appoint him governor of a distant province of his dominions. like many other coarse, though energetic, characters, hamet also mistook his man. he did not know that hassan would be content with nothing short of the position of second in command. when, therefore, he handed him, with many compliments, the paper containing his commission to the governorship of the province alluded to, he was greatly surprised to behold his former friend fly into a violent passion, tear the paper to pieces, and fling it on the ground, as he turned on his heel and left the room abruptly.
so suddenly and vigorously was the act done that hamet’s wonted coolness failed him for a moment, and hassan had passed out into the street before he gave orders, in a voice of thunder, to have him arrested and brought back.
there is no doubt that in his present temper the dey would have had his late colleague strangled on the spot, but, fortunately for himself, sidi hassan, instead of returning to his own house, went straight to the marina, without having any definite object in view, save that he thirsted for vengeance, and meant to have it if possible.
on his way down he met the sapient interpreter, blindi bobi.
“well, bobi,” he said, making an effort to look calm, “any probability of a rising among the slaves?”
“not much,” replied bobi, in turkish, shaking his head; “slaves don’t like to have their heads cut off and their skin torn away in bits.”
“true!” returned hassan, smiling grimly. “do you know where sidi omar is?”
“there,” said blindi bobi in reply, pointing to the individual in question, and sidling rapidly away.
“something ails you, methinks,” said omar, with a keen glance, as hassan approached.
“ay, the new dey ails me,” returned hassan, with a feeling of desperation, for he felt that he was committing himself in thus speaking to one whom he knew to be his enemy—but anger often leads men into unwise speech.
“has he deceived you?” asked omar, with a quiet smile.
“truly, yes. had i known him better he should not have had mine aid. my party followed me, not him. i could have led them otherwise, and still can.”
“it may not be too late,” said omar pointedly, as he began to suspect that hassan’s thirst for revenge would carry him to any length.—“are these sbirros in search of you?” he added on observing several of the officers of justice issue from the town gate.
hassan turned pale.
“your regrets come too late,” said omar significantly.
“my hand and party,” said hassan quickly, “are with you, sidi omar, if—if—”
“step in here,” said the minister of marine, pushing open a small side-door which led into his house.
hassan obeyed, the door was shut, and he felt that he was now completely in the hands of one whom he had hitherto regarded with suspicion and dislike.
of course the minister of marine understood this as well as himself, but he was too wily to let him read his thoughts by his looks or words.
“hassan,” he said, leading him into a small chamber in the seaward ramparts, which was lighted by a very small and strongly-barred window, “you are safe from immediate danger. we may here talk over our plans—for plans i at least have. the dey fears me too much, as you know, to permit me to remain here as minister of marine. he is also so savage and hasty that i do not expect him to restrain his hand for more than a day or two. but i do not mean to give him a chance. my friends are already in possession of the casba—”
“already!” exclaimed hassan in surprise.
“ay, and they hold other places besides. you and your party are of course doomed.”
hassan started to his feet.
“nay—were doomed,” said omar, with a smile; “but what you have said just now alters the case. give me your aid, and that of your party, and you shall have from me the post which hamet has failed to give you. you know me to be a man of my word.”
whether hassan was much comforted by the last remark is a point of uncertainty; but, feeling that he was now entirely in omar’s power, and knowing that although the soldiers whom he styled his “party” were not nearly numerous or influential enough to place him on the throne, he willingly fell in with omar’s views.
“when do you strike?” he asked.
“to-night,” said omar.
“so soon?”
“the sooner the better. come, we have time to go together to the casba. there thou wilt assemble thy chief men, and in my presence give them instructions.”
“you do not trust me,” said hassan reproachfully.
“i have trusted you with my secret and my life,” replied omar, “it is but fitting that thou shouldst give me some sure guarantee of thy friendship—though i doubt it not.”
“be it so,” said hassan, as he rose, and, following the conspirator into the street, hurried up to the citadel.
when hamet dey issued the order to have sidi hassan arrested, as already related, hadji baba, having returned to his wonted place in the lobby of the palace, heard the order, and, being a bold man, ventured into the audience-chamber after the dey had left it. there he found the pieces of the torn commission. picking them hastily up, he retired to his own apartment, put them together, and very soon guessed the nature of the quarrel between his new master and sidi hassan. rightly concluding, from the insolent violence of hassan’s exit and the extremity of the dey’s rage, that the breach was irreparable, and knowing that hassan was a man of some weight with the army, he resolved to ascertain the views of that worthy, and, in the event of his designing mischief, to aid him.
with this end in view he hastened out to search for hassan, but, like the officers of justice, failed for some time to find him. he met, however, with two of the searchers in the persons of the chaouses who had so recently administered the bastinado in a mild manner to himself.
“well met, comrades,” he said, with a nod; “we have no chance of finding sidi hassan, i fear, for when fools are abroad, wise men stop at home.”
“thou hadst better get thee home, then,” retorted the executioner gruffly.
“not badly thrust,” said the jester, laughing; “but have patience with me, comrade. i am no fool to-day. for once in a way i mean to act the wiseacre. you see,”—here he became confidential—“what the household of the palace may expect from our new master.”
“i see nothing,” replied the man testily, “except that whatever master rules there is always plenty of work for me and my chum here to do; and let me tell you, master baba, that i am no revolutionist—i mind my own business.”
“very good, comrade,” returned baba lightly; “thou wilt play the fool to-day and change places with me. but bear in remembrance that a chaouse may have to be beaten as well as a jester, and that it would not be difficult to find others to take thy place. i might even be tempted to do so myself in case of necessity. it would be a rare jest to have a chaouse beaten by a jester, would it not?”
“if it ever comes to that, i hope you will prove grateful and lay on lightly,” returned the man, with a grim smile.
“that will depend on thy behaviour. if thou art resolved to play the fool now, i must of necessity be in earnest then.”
“what mean you?”
“this,” said baba, with sudden gravity, “that those who stand by a falling man must e’en fall along with him.”
“but hamet dey is not falling. he has only just risen!” said the chaouse, with a perplexed look.
“he is not the first who has risen to fall,” replied hadji baba gravely. “i would not stand in his slippers for all the treasure in the casba. be wise, and take advice from a fool. sidi hassan did not quit the palace to-day to go and smoke his pipe. he is a man of power and a malcontent. there are other men of power who are also malcontents and more popular than hamet. when this is so, it behoves the like of you and me to look carefully after our necks, to say nothing of our soles!”
as he said this an exclamation from the elder chaouse drew his attention to the fact that sidi hassan himself had just turned the corner of the street in which they had been conversing, and was at that moment so earnestly engaged in conversation with sidi omar, that the two approached without at first observing the officers of justice.
the instant hassan’s eye alighted on them, he stopped and became visibly paler. omar also stopped, but pretended not to observe the change in his companion’s countenance, nor its cause, as he continued the conversation.
“hist!” whispered hadji baba to his companions, “when enemies become sudden friends, we should know how to act.”
it was evident from the look of anxiety and uncertainty depicted in the visage of the elder chaouse that he did not by any means know how to act. with the stern resolution of a bull-dog nature, however, he suddenly made up his mind to do his duty.
advancing quickly toward hassan, he was about to lay hold of him, when hadji baba stepped abruptly before him, and said with an affable air and smile—
“his highness the dey has sent these good fellows to arrest sidi hassan, and i have taken upon my own shoulders the weighty responsibility—being, as is well-known, a fool—to offer our united services in the reversal of the decree by the arrestment of the dey instead.”
“a bold jest, good fellow, and one that may cost thee thy life, for the present dey understands not a jest.”
“it is no jest,” returned baba, with a keen glance at omar, whom he knew to be a plotter in the state; “my soles tingle now with what they have already received, and my thoughts tingle with what is yet to come. if you have need of friends in the palace here are two—good and true,” said baba, turning to the chaouses, who stood mute with amazement at the man’s impudence, “and i am one, which makes three, according to the rules of arithmetic. if we are not wanted, then these men must do their duty, for sidi hassan is wanted, and we may as well go blithely to our doom together.”
“fellow,” said omar sternly, “dost know that i have power to have thee flayed alive without consulting thy master?”
“nay, not without consulting my master,” said baba, bowing respectfully, “for my master is before me!”
“in sooth thou art a very impudent knave,” returned omar, smiling in spite of himself; “and were i the vile plotter thou imaginest, i should be afraid of having such a changeable friend in the palace.”
“am i changeable for preferring the kind master who was slain to him who slew him?” said baba simply.
“that is true, hadji baba,” returned omar, suddenly changing his tone.—“sidi hassan, fortune is favourable to us. we will trust these men. they dare not play us false even though they would, because their own lives would be forfeited.—hadji baba, it may be well for thee to know that, while we avail ourselves of thine aid and that of thy friends, we are quite independent of it, because it happens that the train is already laid, and nothing that thou couldst do, not even the instant alarm of the palace guards, could prevent it from being fired, i believe thee faithful, but this information may help to increase thy fidelity. go, and, hark ’ee, be very careful to have the guards well placed and looked after to-night at the hour of nine.”
