i think it's about time someone got all those stories together and burned them. you know the kind i mean—x, the mad scientist, wants to change the world; y, the ruthless dictator, wants to rule the world; z, the alien planet, wants to destroy the world.

let me tell you a different kind of story. it's about a whole world that wanted to rule one man—about a planet of people who hunted down a single individual in an effort to change his life, yes, and even destroy him, if it had to be. it's a story about one man against the entire earth, but with the positions reversed.

they've got a place in manhattan city that isn't very well known. not known, i mean, in the sense that the cell-nucleus wasn't known until scientists began to get the general idea. this was an undiscovered cell-nucleus, and still is, i imagine. it's the pivot of our universe. anything that shakes the world comes out of it; and, strangely enough, any shake that does come out of it is intended to prevent worse upheavals.

don't ask questions now. i'll explain as i go along.

the reason the average man doesn't know about this particular nucleus is that he'd probably go off his nut if he did. our officials make pretty sure it's kept secret, and although some nosy-bodies would scream to high heaven if they found out something was being kept from the public, anyone with sense will admit it's for the best.

it's a square white building about ten stories high and it looks like an abandoned hospital. around nine o'clock in the morning you can see a couple of dozen ordinary looking citizens arriving, and at the end of the workday some of them leave. but there's a considerable number that stay overtime and work until dawn or until the next couple of dawns. they're cautious about keeping windows covered so that high-minded citizens won't see the light and run to the controller's office yawping about overtime and breaking down stability. also they happen to have permission.

yeah, it's real big-time stuff. these fellas are so important, and their work is so important they've got permission to break the one unbreakable law. they can work overtime. in fact as far as they're concerned they can do any damned thing they please, stability or no stability—because it so happens they're the babies that maintain stability. how? take it easy. we've got plenty of time—and i'll tell you.

it's called the prog building and it's one of the regular newspaper beats, just like the police courts used to be a couple of hundred years ago. every paper sends a reporter down there at three o'clock. the reporters hang around and bull for a while and then some brass hat interviews them and talks policy and economics and about how the world is doing and how it's going to do. usually it's dull stuff but every once in a while something really big comes out, like the time they decided to drain the mediterranean. they—

what?

you never heard of that? say, who is this guy anyway? are you kidding? from the moon, hey, all your life? never been to the home planet? never heard about what goes on? a real cosmic hick. baby, you can roll me in a rug. i thought your kind died out before i was born. o.k., you go ahead and ask questions whenever you want. maybe i'd better apologize now for the slang. it's part and parcel of the newspaper game. maybe you won't be able to understand me sometimes, but i've got a heart of gold.

anyway—i had the regular three o'clock beat at the prog building and this particular day i got there a little early. seems the trib had a new reporter on the beat, guy by the name of halley hogan, whom i'd never met. i wanted to get together with him and talk policy. for the benefit of the hermit from the moon i'll explain that no two newspapers in any city are permitted to share the same viewpoint or opinion.

i thought all you boys knew that. well, sure—i'm not kidding. look. stability is the watchword of civilization. the world must be stable, right? well, stability doesn't mean stasis. stability is reached through an equipoise of opposing forces that balance each other. newspapers are supposed to balance the forces of public opinion so they have to represent as many different points of view as possible. we reporters always got together before a story, or after, and made sure none of us would agree on our attitudes. you know—some would say it was a terrible thing and some would say it was a wonderful thing and some would say it didn't mean a thing and so on. i was with the times and our natural competitor and opposition was the trib.

the newspaper room in the prog building is right next to the main offices, just off the foyer. it's a big place with low-beamed ceiling and walls done in synthetic wood panels. there was a round table in the center surrounded by hardwood chairs, but we stood the chairs along the wall and dragged up the big deep leather ones. we all would sit with our heels on the table and every chair had a groove on the table in front of it. there was an unwritten law that no shop could be talked until every groove was filled with a pair of heels. that's a newspaper man's idea of a pun.

i was surprised to find almost everybody was in. i slipped into my place and upped with my feet and then took a look around. every sandal showed except the pair that should have been opposite me, so i settled back and shut my eyes. that was where the trib man should have been parked, and i certainly couldn't talk without my opposition being there to contradict me.

the post said: "what makes, carmichael?"

i said: "ho-hum—"

the post said: "don't sleep, baby, there's big things cookin'."

the ledger said: "shuddup, you know the rules—" he pointed to the vacant segment of table.

i said: "you mean the law of the jungle."

the record, who happened to be the ledger's opposition, said: "old bobbus left. he ain't coming in no more."

"how come?"

"got a stereo contract. doing comedy scenarios."

i thought to myself: "oi, that means another wrestling match." you see, whenever new opposition reporters get together, they're supposed to have a symbolic wrestling match. i said supposed. it always turns into a brawl with everybody else having the fun.

"well," i said, "this new hogan probably doesn't know the ropes yet. i guess i'll have to go into training. anybody seen him? he look strong?" they all shook their heads and said they didn't know him. "o.k., then let's gab without him—"

the post said: "your correspondent has it that the pot's a-boilin'. every bigwig in town is in there." he jabbed his thumb toward the main offices.