after dinner g.j. walked a little eastwards from the club, and, entering leicester square from the south, crossed it, and then turned westwards again on the left side of the road leading to piccadilly circus. it was about the time when christine usually went from her flat to her promenade. without admitting a definite resolve to see christine that evening he had said to himself that he would rather like to see her, or that he wouldn't mind seeing her, and that he might, if the mood took him, call at cork street and catch her before she left. having advanced thus far in the sketch of his intentions, he had decided that it would be a pity not to take precautions to encounter her in the street, assuming that she had already started but had not reached the theatre. the chance of meeting her on her way was exceedingly small; nevertheless he would not miss it. hence his roundabout route; and hence his selection of the chaste as against the unchaste pavement of coventry street. he knew very little of christine's professional arrangements, but he did know, from occasional remarks of hers, that owing to the need for economy and the difficulty of finding taxis she now always walked to the promenade on dry nights, and that from a motive of self-respect she always took the south side of piccadilly and the south side of coventry street in order to avoid the risk of ever being mistaken for something which she was not.
it was a dry night, but very cloudy. points of faint illumination, mysteriously travelling across the heavens and revealing the otherwise invisible cushioned surface of the clouds, alone showed that searchlights were at their work of watching over the heedless town. entertainments had drawn in the people from the streets; motor-buses were half empty; implacable parcels-vans, with thin, exhausted boys scarcely descried on their rear perches, forced the more fragile traffic to yield place to them. footfarers were few, except on the north side of coventry street, where officers, soldiers, civilians, police and courtesans marched eternally to and fro, peering at one another in the thick gloom that, except in the immediate region of a lamp, put all girls, the young and the ageing, the pretty and the ugly, the good-natured and the grasping, on a sinister enticing equality. and they were all, men and women and vehicles, phantoms flitting and murmuring and hooting in the darkness. and the violet glow-worms that hung in front of theatres and cinemas seemed to mark the entrances to unimaginable fastnesses, and the side streets seemed to lead to the precipitous edges of the universe where nothing was.
g.j. recognised christine just beyond the knot of loiterers at the piccadilly tube. the improbable had happened. she was walking at what was for her a rather quick pace, purposeful and preoccupied. for an instant the recognition was not mutual; he liked the uninviting stare that she gave him as he stopped.
"it is thou?" she exclaimed, and her dimly-seen face softened suddenly into a delighted, adoring smile.
he was moved by the passion which she still had for him. he felt vaguely and yet acutely an undischarged obligation in regard to her. it was the first time he had met her in such circumstances. a constraint fell between them. in five minutes she would have been in her promenade engaged upon her highly technical business, displaying her attractions while appearing to protect herself within a virginal timidity (for this was her natural method). in any case, even had he not set forth on purpose to find her, he could scarcely have accompanied her to the doors of the theatre and there left her to the night's routine. they both hesitated, and then, without a word, he turned aside and she followed close, acquiescent by training and by instinct. knowing his sure instinct for what was proper, she knew at once that hazard had saved her from the night's routine, and she was full of quiet triumph. he, of course, though absolutely loyal to her, had for dignity's sake to practise the duplicity of pretending to make up his mind what he should do.
they went through the tube station and were soon in one of the withdrawn streets between coventry street and pall mall east. the episode had somehow the air of an adventure. he looked at her; the hat was possibly rather large, but, in truth, she was the image of refinement, delicacy, virtue, virtuous surrender. he thought it was marvellous that there should exist such a woman as she. and he thought how marvellous was the protective vastness of the town, beneath whose shield he was free—free to live different lives simultaneously, to make his own laws, to maintain indefinitely exciting and delicious secrecies. not half a mile off were concepcion and queen, and his amour was as safe from them as if he had hidden it in the depths of some hareemed asiatic city.
christine said politely:
"but i detain thee?"
"as for that," he replied, "what does that matter, after all?"
"thou knowest," she said in a new tone, "i am all that is most worried. in this london they are never willing to leave you in peace."
"what is it, my poor child?" he asked benevolently.
"they talk of closing the promenade," she answered.
"never!" he murmured easily, reassuringly.
he remembered the night years earlier when, as a protest against some restrictive action of a county council, the theatre of varieties whose promenade rivalled throughout the whole world even the promenade of the folies-bergère, shut its doors and darkened its blazing facade, and the entire west end seemed to go into a kind of shocked mourning. but the next night the theatre had reopened as usual and the promenade had been packed. close the promenades! absurd! not the full bench of archbishops and bishops could close the promenades! the thing was inconceivable, especially in war-time, when human nature was so human.
"but it is quite serious!" she cried. "everyone speaks of it.... what idiots! what frightful lack of imagination! and how unjust! what do they suppose we are going to do, we other women? do they intend to put respectable women like me on to the pavement? it is a fantastic idea! fantastic!... and the night-clubs closing too!"
"there is always the other place."
"the ottoman? do not speak to me of the ottoman. moreover, that also will be suppressed. they are all mad." she gave a great sigh. "oh! what a fool i was to leave paris! after all, in paris, they know what it is, life! however, i weary thee. let us say no more about it."
she controlled her agitation. the subject was excessively delicate, and that she should have expressed herself so violently on it showed the powerful reality of the emotion it had aroused in her. unquestionably the decency of her livelihood was at stake. she had convinced him of the peril. but what could he say? he could not say, "do not despair. you are indispensable; therefore you will not be dispensed with. these crises have often arisen before, and they always end in the same manner. and are there not the big hotels, the chic cinemas, certain restaurants? not to mention the clientèle which you must have made for yourself?" such remarks were impossible. but not more impossible than the very basis of his relations with her. he was aware again of the weight of an undischarged obligation to her. his behaviour towards her had always been perfection, and yet was she not his creditor? he had a conscience, and it was illogical and extremely inconvenient.
at that moment a young man flew along the silent, shadowed street, and as he passed them shouted somewhat hysterically the one word:
"zepps!"
christine clutched his arm. they stood still.
"do not be frightened," said g.j. with perfect tranquillity.
"but i hear guns," she protested.
he, too, heard the distant sounds of guns, and it occurred to him that the sounds had begun earlier, while they were talking.
"i expect it's only anti-aircraft practice," he replied. "i seem to remember seeing a warning in the paper about there being practice one of these nights."
christine, increasing the pressure on his arm and apparently trying to drag him away, complained:
"they ought to give warning of raids. that is elementary. this country is so bizarre."
"oh!" said g.j., full of wisdom and standing his ground. "that would never do. warnings would make panics, and they wouldn't help in the least. we are just as safe here as anywhere. even supposing there is an air-raid, the chance of any particular spot being hit must be several million to one against. and i don't think for a moment there is an air-raid."
"why?"
"well, i don't," g.j. answered with calm superiority. the fact was that he did not know why he thought there was not an air-raid. to assume that there was not an air-raid, in the absence of proof positive of the existence of an air-raid, was with him constitutional: a state of mind precisely as illogical, biased and credulous as the alarmist mood which he disdained in others. also he was lacking in candour, for after a few seconds the suspicion crept into his mind that there might indeed be an air-raid—and he would not utter it.
"in any case," said christine, "they always give warning in paris."
he thought:
"i'd better get this woman home," and said aloud: "come along."
"but is it safe?" she asked anxiously.
he saw that she was the primeval woman, exactly like concepcion and queen. first she wanted to run, and then when he was ready to run she asked: "is it safe?" and he felt very indulgent and comfortably masculine. he admitted that it would be absurd to expect the conduct of a frightened christine to be governed by the operations of reason. he was not annoyed, because personally he simply did not care a whit whether they moved or not. while they were hesitating a group of people came round the corner. these people were talking loudly, and as they approached g.j. discerned that one of them was pointing to the sky.
"there she is! there she is!" shouted an eager voice. seeing more human society in g.j. and christine, the group stopped near them.
g.j. gazed in the indicated direction, and lo! there was a point of light in the sky.
and then guns suddenly began to sound much nearer.
"what did i tell you?" said another voice. "i told you they'd cleared the corner at the bottom of st. james's street for a gun. now they've got her going. good for us they're shooting southwards."
christine was shaking on g.j.'s arm.
"it's all right! it's all right!" he murmured compassionately, and she tightened her clutch on him in thanks.
he looked hard at the point of light, which might have been anything. the changing forms of thin clouds continually baffled the vision.
"by god!" shouted the first voice. "she's hit. see her stagger? she's hit. she'll blaze up in a moment. one down last week. another this. look at her now. she's afire."
the group gave a weak cheer.
then the clouds cleared for an instant and revealed a crescent. g.j. said:
"that's the moon, you idiots. it's not a zeppelin."
even as he spoke he wondered, and regretted, that he should be calling them idiots. they were complete strangers to him. the group vanished, crestfallen, round another corner. g.j. laughed to christine. then the noise of guns was multiplied. that he was with christine in the midst of an authentic air-raid could no longer be doubted. he was conscious of the wine he had drunk at the club. he had the sensation of human beings, men like himself, who ate and drank and laced their boots, being actually at that moment up there in the sky with intent to kill him and christine. it was a marvellous sensation, terrible but exquisite. and he had the sensation of other human beings beyond the sea, giving deliberate orders in german for murder, murdering for their lives; and they, too, were like himself, and ate and drank and either laced their boots or had them laced daily. and the staggering apprehension of the miraculous lunacy of war swept through his soul.
